Be and Become Psychology

25/02/2026

Right now, does even getting in the car feel like another thing you can’t be bothered doing ?

Another task. Another coordination activity. Another thing to figure out.

I support women via Telehealth so you don’t have to add traffic, parking or another logistical juggle to your week.

But this isn’t just about convenience.

It’s about creating enough space over time in your schedule and your inner world that one day you could drive to an appointment, a cafe or a walk on your own without feeling overwhelmed, rushed and pulled in ten different directions.

The goal isn’t to make your world smaller.

It’s to help the mental load shift so you can breathe and have space in your life again ( even with a busy family).

Online therapy for working women across Australia.

Reach out to make an appointment.

20/02/2026

10/02/2026

The mental load is the invisible work of knowing where things are, knowing what needs to be done, anticipating needs, tracking timelines and holding information so family life keeps ticking along.

Gendered roles and socialisation often place this 'in your head' cognitive labour on women—especially mothers—making them the default 'know where things are in the house person', as well as the memory, planner and monitor not just for children and teens but for adult partners too.

When one person carries most of the remembering, knowing and anticipating it quite frankly becomes exhausting and can lead to cognitive overload, chronic stress and burnout.

Is it unreasonable for two adults in a household to both know where things are, what needs doing and when ? No. It’s reasonable.

When each person holds agreed upon responsibility for specific tasks within the household division of labour and caregiving—without needing to be prompted, reminded or managed—it reduces cognitive strain, supports psychological wellbeing and helps improve relationships.

Because after 10 years of marriage each adult should know where the beach towels are kept, how to inform the school that their kid is sick and know the Netflix login details !

31/01/2026

The mental load and burnout are real for working mums. Discover how your beliefs shape responsibility and learn the first step to carrying less. A quick 2 min read – link in bio.

www.beandbecome.net.au/insights

14/01/2026

Ever feel like you’re running the family while everyone else just helps?

Shared responsibility ≠ delegation.

To truly reduce the mental load, others need to take full ownership of a task—start to finish.

That includes the invisible mental work that happens before the task even begins.

When one person manages the system, they carry the mental load… even if others ‘help’.

06/01/2026

Emotional labour is the effort required to manage your own emotions and the emotions of others, often to meet social or professional expectations.
This includes:
• Suppressing negative emotions like frustration or stress
• Displaying positive emotions like cheerfulness or patience
• Caring for other people’s emotional needs: anticipating, comforting and managing moods

Emotional labour adds an extra layer of effort on top of the mental load, because you’re not only managing tasks but also managing how people feel while you do it.

For working mums, this often means they are constantly multitasking between work responsibilities, family planning and emotional support—all of which can be mentally and emotionally taxing.

Acknowledging the invisible work behind the scenes helps us see its impact and validate our own experience.

29/12/2025

Being a mum, working, doing both - Yes it can be exhausting.

But what often goes unnoticed is the mental load—all the planning, remembering, worrying and organising that never stops.

That invisible weight can completely drain you of time, space and energy to pursue other things outside of these roles—things that expand the sense of who you are and allow you to enjoy being your own person.

12/12/2025

• Beliefs create expectations.
• Beliefs determine boundaries.
• Beliefs affect perception of tasks.
• Beliefs shape behaviour.

02/12/2025

- Before anyone can eat dinner I have to plan meals, check ingredients, write the grocery list, shop, prep, cook, serve and clean up.

Before the kids can do extra curricular activity I have to register them, pay fees, buy gear, track schedules, wash uniforms, organise drop-offs and plan snacks.

-Before laundry can get done I have to gather clothes, sort them, check for stains, wash them, switch loads, dry them, fold them and put everything away.

Before the kids can go to school I have to get them up in time, give them breakfast, pack lunches, figure out if it's library day today, sign forms and make sure they have clean uniforms.

And I'm not able to do any of these things just by themselves without interruption and without other competing demand landing on my lap.

25/11/2025

19/11/2025

Carrying the mental load isn’t just about the tasks you do — it’s the constant mental effort of planning, managing, and worrying. Even when you try to step back, those longstanding patterns of being the 'default' often take over.

Over time, this can make it hard to rest, switch off, or focus on your own needs.

Partners have a role to play too — the mental load isn’t meant to fall on just one person. Breaking these habits takes effort, but it can be done — one step at a time.

10/11/2025

As a psychologist, I often hear working mums say “I’m just so tired”. Part of the reason might just be the mental load they carry— the invisible work of planning, remembering, organising and caring for everyone.

It’s the constant background ‘thinking’ task of managing family life, even when you’re at work or trying to rest.

This endless daily mental effort can lead to fatigue, stress and emotional depletion.

Truly sharing the load means sharing the thinking, not just the tasks.