Child-Centred Sydney

28/08/2025

Child-Centred Sydney is relocating to a purposely fit-out space with increased availability. To celebrate, I am offering caregivers this opportunity.

28/08/2025

Brain building through play: Activities for infants, toddlers and children.
Source: Centre on the Developing Child - Harvard University.

Playful interactions with adults help develop sturdy brain architecture, the foundations of lifelong health, and the building blocks of resilience.

26/08/2025

There are various types of play therapy. These are grounded on different theoretical models and sit on a continuum ranging from non-directive to directive. Child-centred play therapy (CCPT) is a Humanistic intervention and the most non-directive of all play therapy modalities.

To access the latest play therapy research, including meta analyses and reviews, please visit https://evidencebasedchildtherapy.com

26/08/2025

24/08/2025

03/07/2025

28/06/2025

As we prepare to celebrate Play Therapy Day this week, I want to share the brilliance of Child-Centred Play Therapy (CCPT).

You might have heard of Play Therapy before —in fact, many paediatric practitioners use a play-based approach—, but not all Play Therapy is born equal. CCPT stands apart because it's non-directive, highly specialised and backed by over a hundred years of research.

Child-Centred Play Therapy (CCPT) is a psychotherapy approach for children that is based on their natural way of self-expression: Play. With play seen as the child’s language and ‘toys’ as their words, the therapeutic materials in the playroom have been carefully selected to facilitate communication.

But the most important resource in the room is the therapist. Just like in other modalities, the child-clinician relationship is the highest predictor of positive treatment outcomes. The therapist builds an unconditional relationship within a warm, safe and predictable environment. This special connection is healing for the child.

In play therapy, the child uses the whole self —mind and body— to express unconscious thoughts, wishes, fears, anxieties and so forth. This helps them process ‘stuck’ emotions and thoughts. Through such play, the therapist gains an understanding of the child’s needs and experiences without asking questions.

CCPT specialists are trained to read the metaphors of the play and observe emerging patterns. These observations help the clinician to reflect thoughts and feelings back to the child, thus addressing the underlying sources of challenges.

Change then happens from the inside out. As internal growth increases, behavioural symptoms will decrease. This leads to a stronger person (resilience and inner strength), more able to tolerate triggers and changes. The effects are progressively noticed in the child’s daily functioning.
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Play Therapy Day is celebrated on 1 July in Australia and the Asia-Pacific region.

11/06/2025

** Announcement ** The name of this page has been changed from Resources for Mindful Parents to Child-Centred Sydney.

The new name is more aligned with the clinical work that I do and my vision: A child-centred society that values and respects children’s rights.

There is now a section under Albums called Resources for Mindful Parents. This includes a collection of infographics on child development, well-being and parenting.

Kindly,
Ale

09/06/2025

When I was growing up, my mum had a poster of the 1959 Declaration of the Rights of the Child in her paediatric waiting room. By the time I was a teenager, the declaration was followed by the UN Convention on the Rights of the Child (1989). This is the most widely ratified human rights treaty in history. The only UN country that hasn't ratified the treaty is the United States.

However, to what extent do duty bearers uphold the articles of the Convention? Wars, climate change and our busy lives in a fast-paced society often make it virtually impossible to do so. The results speak for themselves.

As a child reading my mum's poster, it seemed odd that there was a specific article about play (Art. 31). And yet, that has not been enough to ensure and promote play across all ages. In fact, free play has been in decline over the past 35 years. So much so that the UN General Assembly has now proclaimed 11 June as the International Day of Play.

Play isn't just play. Play is a physical, emotional and developmental need, as well as a basic human right. As parents, our responsibility is to allow ample time for unstructured free play, much of it outdoors. As a society, we must create and support spaces and systemic structures that encourage such unstructured free play.

But for all of this to happen, we must first educate ourselves about human development and the consequences of not allowing children the time, space and opportunity to play.
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First published in June 2024.
On 25 March 2024, the United Nations General Assembly proclaimed 11 June as the International Day of Play, to be observed annually (A/RES/78/268).

23/05/2025

Seven lessons from The Boy Who Was Raised as a Dog

1. Trauma Is Not What Happens. It Is What Happens Inside You

Dr. Perry explains that trauma is not defined by the event itself but by how overwhelmed and helpless a person feels in response to it. Two children can live through the same experience and be affected in completely different ways.

2. The Brain Remembers What the Mouth Cannot Say

Dr. Perry shows how early trauma literally shapes the architecture of the brain. It changes how a child perceives safety, relationships, and even time. Many behaviors that look like defiance or disobedience are actually fear responses. Survival strategies.

3. Connection Heals What Trauma Breaks

This might be the heart of the whole book. Children who have been hurt by people can only begin to heal through relationships with people who are consistent, patient, and safe. Therapy matters. Structure matters. But above all else, healing comes through connection. This truth extends beyond childhood. It applies to all of us. We are wired for love. We are wounded by disconnection. And we are repaired through presence.

4. Safety Comes Before Change

Before a child can think clearly or learn or trust or grow, they must feel safe. Truly safe. Not just physically, but emotionally. Dr. Perry emphasises that we cannot expect traumatised children to behave like their peers without first helping their nervous systems settle.

5. Patience Is Not a Weak Response. It Is Sacred Work

Often adults miss the mark not because they do not care, but because they are tired, scared, or unprepared. The healing work Dr. Perry describes is slow. It is not flashy. It often looks like nothing is happening. But beneath the surface, the child is rebuilding their sense of self, brick by quiet brick. That work deserves reverence.

6. What Was Broken in Relationship Must Be Repaired in Relationship

Many of the children in this book were hurt in places that should have been safe. Their pain came from those who were supposed to love and protect them. That is why healing can only happen when someone new shows up differently. With steadiness. With gentleness. With no agenda other than to be with them.

7. There Is Always Hope. But It Looks Different Than We Expect

Some of the children in this book recover in ways that are miraculous. Others find partial peace. Others simply survive. And yet all of these outcomes matter. Dr. Perry never promises a perfect ending. What he promises instead is this: if we meet people where they are, if we see beyond the behavior into the wound, if we walk alongside them with compassion, something sacred begins to shift. And that is enough.

The Boy Who Was Raised as a Dog is more than a book about trauma. It is a book about what it means to be human. It will break your heart. But it will rebuild it too.

This is not a book to be rushed. It is a book to be felt. To be cried over. To be remembered.

If you are a parent, a teacher, a therapist, a survivor, or simply someone trying to make sense of a hurting world, let this book walk with you. You will not be the same when you finish it. And in this case, that is a very good thing.

Book: https://amzn.to/4j4I2bi

Audiobook also available using the link above.

23/05/2025

A beautiful song to help caregivers remember how to "be with" and focus on the relationship with their child rather than what's wrong.
By Shiranne, from Not Twins

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Visible

First connect
Pause, reflect
Reflect often

Be present
Be patient
Enjoy them

Give space, give time
Show grace, go outside
Say less, say yes, empathize

And, breathe, slow down
Be here and trust them
Go upstream, observe more
Be mindful, they’re people

Look inward
Listen more
Just listen

Validate feelings
Just wait
Allow them

Give space, give time
Show grace, go outside
Say less, say yes, empathize

Long game, lens shift
Reframe, check myself
Children understand, choose more love

And, breathe, slow down
Be here and trust them
Go upstream, observe more
Be mindful, they’re people

Adjust expectations, drop rope for fewer battles
Choose collaboration and let go - connection matters
Respectful communication
It depends
It depends
It depends
Try again to

Give space, give time
Show grace, go outside
Say less, say yes, empathize

Long game, lens shift
Reframe, check myself
Self care, no fear, I’m enough

And, breathe, slow down
Be here and trust them
Go upstream, observe more
Be mindful, they’re people
Visible

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Listen to the song here https://www.facebook.com/NotTwins/videos/1124517634589715

15/05/2025

On this International Family Day we recognise that parenting is one of life’s most rewarding, yet complex, roles. It becomes even more nuanced when faced with challenging behaviours in children. Parents may feel overwhelmed, isolated, or even guilty when behaviours like tantrums, defiance, and aggression appear. Yet, these behaviours are not uncommon, and there are compassionate, effective ways to approach and understand them.

What are challenging behaviours?
Challenging behaviours encompass a range of actions that disrupt a child’s daily life, impact their ability to connect with others, or even threaten their own safety. For instance, a child may display physical aggression like hitting or pushing, verbal outbursts, or even self-injurious actions. These behaviours, often signalling a struggle within the child, are particularly common among children with developmental or learning challenges, but they can appear in any child under stress or frustration.

Understanding that these behaviours are often a way for children to express their needs—especially when they lack the words or skills to do so—helps us see them in a more compassionate light.

Children’s behaviours, even the challenging ones, often have underlying causes. Here are some key factors that can influence a child’s behaviour:

🩵 Developmental and biological influences
For some children, neurological or developmental differences can influence behaviour. Children with autism or intellectual disabilities, for instance, may engage in self-injurious behaviours, display aggression, or exhibit repetitive actions. These behaviours may intensify when the child feels overstimulated or when they lack adequate support to express themselves.

🩵 Sensory processing needs
Sensory sensitivities can make seemingly normal environments overwhelming. A child who is hypersensitive to sounds, textures, or lights might feel distressed in busy settings, leading to meltdowns or avoidance behaviours. These reactions are often misunderstood, yet they represent the child’s attempt to self-regulate in a world that feels chaotic to them.

🩵 Emotional development and temperament
Temperament plays a significant role in how children respond to stress. Some children have a more intense emotional response to new or challenging situations, which can make it harder for them to manage impulses or frustrations. This emotional sensitivity, common in children with autism, for instance, can lead to frequent meltdowns or defiant responses.

🩵 Environmental and social stressors
Every child is affected by their surroundings. Major changes like moving, a new sibling, or family stress can make children feel unsettled, which may manifest as challenging behaviour. In addition, cultural expectations or community settings can affect how a behaviour is perceived and responded to, influencing the child’s comfort level in various situations.

A few gentle reminders:
• Every child expresses their needs in different ways.
• Every family looks different—parents, grandparents, carers, and kin all count.
• It’s okay to ask for help. Teachers, health professionals, and community services can be valuable allies.

Whether you’re parenting in a city high-rise or a rural town, whether you’re working with a speech therapist or learning through lived experience—know that your compassion matters.

Keep listening, learning, and lifting one another up. Because humility, like parenting, is a lifelong journey. 💙

✨Want to read more about understanding challenging behaviours, read more in our blog article: https://neuro.now/lived_experience/understanding-challenging-behaviours-in-children/

References:
Absoud, M., Wake, H., Ziriat, M., & Hassiotis, A. (2019). Managing challenging behaviour in children with possible learning disability. BMJ, 365. https://doi.org/10.1136/bmj.l1663.

Didden, R., Sturmey, P., Sigafoos, J., Lang, R., O'Reilly, M., & Lancioni, G. (2012). Nature, Prevalence, and Characteristics of Challenging Behavior., 25-44. https://doi.org/10.1007/978-1-4614-3037-7_3.

O'Reilly, M., Rispoli, M., Davis, T., Machalicek, W., Lang, R., Sigafoos, J., Kang, S., Lancioni, G., Green, V., & Didden, R. (2010). Functional analysis of challenging behavior in children with autism spectrum disorders: A summary of 10 cases. Research in Autism Spectrum Disorders, 4, 1-10. https://doi.org/10.1016/J.RASD.2009.07.001.

Korbut, S., Hedley, D., Chetcuti, L., Sahin, E., & Nuske, H. (2020). Temperament predicts challenging behavior in children with autism spectrum disorder at age 5. Research in autism spectrum disorders, 71. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.rasd.2019.101492.

Rogers, B. (2004). How to Manage Children's Challenging Behaviour. https://doi.org/10.4135/9781446251690.

Worcester, J., Nesman, T., Mendez, L., & Keller, H. (2008). Giving Voice to Parents of Young Children with Challenging Behavior. Exceptional Children, 74, 509 - 525. https://doi.org/10.1177/001440290807400406.