06/02/2026
It’s S*x on and tonight we're reversing some old messages about our vocal chords when it comes to making a lil' noise.
“Shh… they might hear you.”
For a lot of us, that sentence was part of our first experiences in the bedroom.
Teenage bedrooms. Thin walls. Parents asleep down the hall.
S*x became something you did quietly, carefully, apologetically.
Bodies learned the rules fast:
Don’t gasp.
Don’t moan.
Don’t say too much.
Definitely don’t sound like you’re enjoying it that much.
And here’s the thing, those early lessons don’t automatically disappear when privacy finally arrives.
Even as adults, many people keep having s*x as if someone is listening.
Jaw clenched. Breath held. Sounds swallowed before they escape.
From a s*xology perspective, voice can be an integral tool.
Sound helps the nervous system release intensity.
Words help the body stay present.
Moans, sighs, laughter, dirty talk, soft affirmations ... these aren’t performative.
They’re how arousal circulates instead of getting stuck.
Letting yourself be verbal during s*x isn’t about being loud for someone else.
It’s about giving your body permission to respond honestly.
There’s a particular joy in that unlearning:
The first time you don’t hush yourself.
The first time a sound surprises you.
The first time words fall out without planning.
It can feel vulnerable. Even rebellious.
That’s often a sign you’re touching something real.
You weren’t meant to experience pleasure on mute. You were just taught to. And you’re allowed (now) to turn the volume back up.
Up next Friday: the moans, the groans, the sighs of it all
**sh
