The Accident
It was a pleasant sunday 23/11/2003 I was returning home after spending some time with brother and nephews . I remember a car
towing a caravan about two car's ahead , I was in no rush so I kept a good gap between me and car in front . I had just entered 80km zone when about 800mtrs ahead I could see quite a lot of traffic slowing to make a left turn . The offender caught my eye straight away ( I could tell he was speeding ) he had to go wide to avoid car in front of him which was making a right turn . As soon as his car veered off bitumen he lost control , it seemed to me like he was going to end up crashing through a property fence to my right , when suddenly as he tried to over correct his loss of steering, his front right hand tyre caught part of bitumen road and suddenly it was obvious he was coming straight towards me . ( now all this took place in only a few seconds and because of high speed he was travelling I only had a split second to make the decision that ultimately saved my life - I swung hard on steering wheel but it was to late ) last thing I remember was knowing that a bad accident was about to occur . Report - eye witness
I was hit high speed side on as I tried to avoid him . My car actually got picked up and flipped over top of car that hit me . Obviously I was knocked out immediately , but as my car flipped and landed heavily back down on drivers side . the second impact to my head must have brought me back around . Driver of caravan three cars ahead said
" That bloke flew past me and as I looked in my rearview mirror I could see the red commodore behind me was air borne which was higher than the height of the caravan I was towing "
I remember being trapped as my car was on its side . I couldn't move any of my right side and a confusion which I can only now describe was concussion . There was fuel everywhere I was in an extraordinary amount of pain and I couldn't undo my seatbelt
( which ultimately saved my life with a combination of other factors ) I could hear voices and my adrenalin was in survival mode , I said to whoever was there to get me out of car asap before it caught on fire ( From past experience I knew how quickly a car can burn out especially when there is a full fuel tank of gasoline splashed everywhere through car ) I wanted out and I wanted out imediately and i didn't care how they did it or how much physical injuries I sustained . People pushed car over and immediately a fire started under bonnet . I remember two fairly big blokes drag me out of car and drag me about 40-50mtrs to a car that had stopped because of accident scene. Adrenalin pumping ,confusion still very much present , trouble breathing , still couldn't move any of my right side . Pain was even more excruciating from being dragged out of car ( But being away from car was one immediate danger taken care of )
There were people everywhere , some yelling , some crying , some panicking , I just remember thinking I hope the ambulance gets here asap . A young couple gave me some comforting words and some religious prayers . Ambulance took me to Princess Alexandria Hospital emergency -
Sadly the bloke who hit me died pretty much on impact - So because he drove high speed while drinking ( he lost his life ) Me and another bloke have to live with the consequences of that accident every day for life .. ( to be continued AALD )
Lost & Found: What Brain Injury Survivors Want You to Know
I need a lot more rest than I used to. I get physical fatigue as well as a “brain fatigue.” It is very difficult and tiring for my brain to think, process, and organize. My stamina fluctuates, even though I may look good or “all better” on the outside. Cognition is a fragile function for a brain injury survivor. Some days are better than others. Pushing too hard usually leads to setbacks, sometimes to illness. Brain injury rehabilitation takes a very long time; it is usually measured in years. It continues long after formal rehabilitation has ended. Please resist expecting me to be who I was, even though I look better. I am not being difficult if I resist social situations. Crowds, confusion, and loud sounds quickly overload my brain, it doesn’t filter sounds as well as it used to. Limiting my exposure is a coping strategy, not a behavioral problem. If there is more than one person talking, I may seem uninterested in the conversation. That is because I have trouble following all the different “lines” of discussion. It is exhausting to keep trying to piece it all together. I’m not dumb or rude; my brain is getting overloaded! If we are talking and I tell you that I need to stop, I need to stop NOW! And it is not because I’m avoiding the subject, it’s just that I need time to process our discussion and “take a break” from all the thinking. Later I will be able to rejoin the conversation and really be present for the subject and for you. Try to notice the circumstances if a behavior problem arises. “Behavior problems” are often an indication of my inability to cope with a specific situation and not a mental health issue. I may be frustrated, in pain, overtired or there may be too much confusion or noise for my brain to filter. Patience is the best gift you can give me. It allows me to work deliberately and at my own pace, allowing me to rebuild pathways in my brain. Rushing and multi-tasking inhibit cognition. Please listen to me with patience. Try not to interrupt. Allow me to find my words and follow my thoughts. It will help me rebuild my language skills. Please have patience with my memory. Know that not remembering does not mean that I don’t care. Please don’t be condescending or talk to me like I am a child. I’m not stupid, my brain is injured and it doesn’t work as well as it used to. Try to think of me as if my brain were in a cast. If I seem “rigid,” needing to do tasks the same way all the time; it is because I am retraining my brain. It’s like learning main roads before you can learn the shortcuts. Repeating tasks in the same sequence is a rehabilitation strategy. If I seem “stuck,” my brain may be stuck in the processing of information. Coaching me, suggesting other options or asking what you can do to help may help me figure it out. Taking over and doing it for me will not be constructive and it will make me feel inadequate. (It may also be an indication that I need to take a break.) You may not be able to help me do something if helping requires me to frequently interrupt what I am doing to give you directives. I work best on my own, one step at a time and at my own pace. If I repeat actions, like checking to see if the doors are locked or the stove is turned off, it may seem like I have OCD — obsessive-compulsive disorder — but I may not. It may be that I am having trouble registering what I am doing in my brain. Repetitions enhance memory. (It can also be a cue that I need to stop and rest.) If I seem sensitive, it could be emotional lability as a result of the injury or it may be a reflection of the extraordinary effort it takes to do things now. Tasks that used to feel “automatic” and take minimal effort, now take much longer, require the implementation of numerous strategies and are huge accomplishments for me. We need cheerleaders now, as we start over, just like children do when they are growing up. Please help me and encourage all efforts. Please don’t be negative or critical. I am doing the best I can. Don’t confuse Hope for Denial. We are learning more and more about the amazing brain and there are remarkable stories about healing in the news every day. No one can know for certain what our potential is. We need Hope to be able to employ the many, many coping mechanisms, accommodations and strategies needed to navigate our new lives. Everything single thing in our lives is extraordinarily difficult for us now. It would be easy to give up without Hope.
