Carla Da Costa

13/02/2026

Roses Are Red. Standards Are Higher? 🌹
Maybe you are single.
Maybe you are in a situationship that calls itself “seeing how it goes”.
Maybe you are healing and not available for nonsense.
Maybe you're in something that is not love at all.

My Valentines Day Newsletter for you.

13/02/2026

The Making Of A MasterPiece - For those who had a deep 🐍 year.

‘Spirit is carved from the wastelands of my mind.

It takes its form while gathering my woes.

With tools in hand, it shapes for me my dream.

It smoothes away the sadness to reveal the soft edges.

It grinds away the despair to expose the velvet texture of my bliss.

Spirit’s mallet pounds away at the indentations left by the footprints of my fears.

Standing back, Spirit finally inspects what has come forth from this chaos.

Changes are made allowing my hidden emotions to be shown the way out of their abyss.

Now the carved sculpture stands for all to see in the splendour that is SPIRIT and the GRACE that is me.’

By A Eckhardt

✨ This year happened FOR me. Not TOO me ✨

12/02/2026

If you recognised yourself in this, this is for you.

Guilt and shame do not just sit in the background. They shape your standards. Your decisions. Your tolerance. Your future.

You tell yourself you have moved on.
That other’s have.
But your nervous system is still carrying regret, guilt and shame.
Still replaying conversations.
What you did.
How you handled things.

And that internal conflict keeps you small.
Because you’re not facing the devil within.

Inside AfterGlow, we do not skim the surface.

We move step by step.

First, we stabilise you emotionally.
You learn how to regulate your triggers instead of being ruled by them.

Then we identify the guilt and shame story you are still carrying.
The ones linked to the marriage.
The ones linked to your choices.
The ones linked to who you think you should have been.

We separate facts from identity.
You stop labelling yourself as the failure.

Next, we rebuild self trust.
Through clear standards.
Boundaries that hold.
Decisions that align with the person you are becoming.

And finally, we shift you into self leadership.

You stop seeking external validation.
You stop chasing closure.
You stop running from your shadow.
You start choosing from power.

AfterGlow is not about becoming someone new.
It is about returning to the person you were before guilt distorted your self worth.

If you are ready to stop circling the same emotional patterns, message me the word GUILT.

Let’s face this elephant in your room once and for all.

12/02/2026

You thought this time would be different — you've done the therapy, read the books, taken away the insights. Yet the same pattern shows up. But patterns don’t change with insight alone; they change with integration.

Read my new post to learn why you keep repeating relationship patterns after divorce and practical steps to break the cycle. https://wix.to/Rcy0TID

Are you repeating the same relationship patterns after divorce? Learn why it happens and how to break the cycle for good.

11/02/2026

What you don’t heal catches up with you and collects interest. 9 years post my own marriage ending, having coached over 2,000 men and women in this season of their life I see it over and over again.

*Follow my step by step process within AfterGlow my coaching program for women post-separation. Drop every other healing or therapy modality you’re dabbling in and give me 3 months of your life. I’ll change it 🙌🏼DM me “THRIVE” to enquire.

10/02/2026

Comment “PODCAST” below this post to receive the link to listen and learn more. Alternately visit the link in my profile to my Podcast.

By facing your own patterns head on with truth you save your children from the responsibility of having to do it for themselves.

♥️♥️♥️

09/02/2026

After a marriage separation, clarity isn’t one moment — it’s a process. This short read from Carla Da Costa walks through the stages of seeing your ex, reclaiming your perspective, and why where you stop matters for your kids. A must-read for anyone navigating separation and co‑parenting.

Read more: https://wix.to/U5pSWg1

After a marriage ends, clarity comes in stages.Most people don’t realise this.They think clarity is a single moment where the truth finally lands.In reality, it’s a progression.And where you stop matters, not just for you, but for your children.Perspective shift one: seeing your ex clearlyThis i...

09/02/2026

A first session with me isn’t about fixing you.
And it isn’t about digging through your past for the sake of it.

I start by listening to you open up.
I listen to how you speak about your life.
The words your mind uses to explain.
What you normalise.
What you minimise.
I hear what you’ve learned to carry quietly in the gaps between what you do and don’t say.

I’m observing your body language.
The gaze in your eyes and how you hold yourself.
I read your energy.
Including when it’s performative.
I read your subconscious - the answers you think in your mind but don’t speak.

Most women arrive thinking they’re coming for clarity.
What they often experience first is relief.
Because for the first time, they’re not managing the conversation or directing where this needs to go.
I do.

Internally I’m naming and identifying your internal belief system.
Understanding what I need to do to up-level it for you.
I’m writing down your blind spots you can’t see to share them with you.
I help you see what you’ve been navigating on autopilot.
Patterns you’ve survived inside of.
Emotional plateaus you didn’t realise were shaping your choices.

There are often quiet ah-ha moments.
You begin to understand why certain things still feel heavy.
Why moving on hasn’t felt as free as you expected.
Why coping has replaced feeling settled.

We don’t rush change.
We don’t strip away your coping strategies.
We build awareness and safety together.

You leave the session feeling more grounded, clear and empowered. Not exposed.
Clear, not cracked open.
And with language for things you’ve felt but never named.

Most women say some version of:
“I didn’t realise this was still affecting me.”
“I thought this was just normal for me now.”
“I feel different already.”

Not because everything is solved.
Because clarity with the right support changes how you carry and see yourself.
If you’re functioning well but feel emotionally flat, tight, or tired of doing this alone, a first session is often the turning point.

If you’d like to explore working together, message me directly via my inbox with the word “SESSION.”

You don’t need to be in crisis.
You just need to be honest about what’s not working.

07/02/2026

You do not need more insight or learnings from books, podcasts or YouTube videos.
You need a different relationship with your pattern’s and reactions.

Let this land.

03/02/2026

And this is why so many first marriages don’t last…or shouldn’t…

In my work I combine both shamanic, psychological and coaching modalities to navigate my clients through this internal process.

Please DM me “FIRST MARRIAGE” to explore my services if this share resonated with you.

*Please note I do not work in the same way or method as a therapist or counsellor.