Kylie Thomas

Kylie Thomas Sexologist | Psychologist

Stop Faking Org*sm's: Start Feeling Authentic Pleasure ✨💡 Learn your body - what it likes, needs, and how it changes ove...
09/01/2025

Stop Faking Org*sm's: Start Feeling Authentic Pleasure ✨

💡 Learn your body - what it likes, needs, and how it changes over time. Pleasure mapping can help!
✋ Explore self-pleasure - mix it up and even try a m*sturbation mediation to discover new sensations.
🎯 Shift your focus - make pleasure the goal, not the big O. Regularly ask yourself, 'What would make this feel even better?'.
💬 Communicate openly - share your desires, fantasies, and boundaries with your partner(s).
🍽️ Expand your menu - variety keeps things exciting, think of s*x like a buffet instead of a set menu.
👩 Seek support - if this feels overwhelming, a s*x therapist can empower you to overcome this with education, tools and strategies.

Faking doesn't serve anyone, but real pleasure? That's worth the effort 🔥

What's one step you could take today to connect with your authentic pleasure? Comment below 👇

Faking Org*sms: Nobody Wins, When Pleasure isn't Real!Faking org*sm is more common then you might think. Research shows ...
08/01/2025

Faking Org*sms: Nobody Wins, When Pleasure isn't Real!

Faking org*sm is more common then you might think. Research shows that around 68% of women and vulv* owners have faked an org*sm at least once, and another study puts that number even higher at 80% during s*x.

But it's not just women - about 25% of men admit to faking it too, especially in casual encounters rather than committed relationships.

Why do people fake it? Whether it's to avoid hurting a partner's feelings, end an uncomfortable experience, or because they feel pressure to perform. But, faking doesn't help anyone in the long run because it reinforces unrealistic expectations about the female body, can impact negatively on mental health (i.e., decreased self-esteem and heightened anxiety), and foster a cycle of disconnection from self and your partner.

Have you ever felt pressure to fake it?

Book an appointment for individualised, evidenced-based care to help you address this concern with understanding, compassion and practical strategies for lasting change.

Spicy Tips to Stop Spectatoring & Boost Pleasure 🌶️✨Are you stuck in your head during intimacy, worrying about how you l...
06/01/2025

Spicy Tips to Stop Spectatoring & Boost Pleasure 🌶️✨

Are you stuck in your head during intimacy, worrying about how you look or perform? That's called spectatoring, and it's a common distraction that can be a barrier to pleasure.

Here's how to shift focus to more self-connection and embodiment:
🔥 Focus on your senses - what do you feel, hear, see and taste in the moment?
🔥 Breathe deeply to ground yourself and stay present.
🔥 Notice and observe spectatoring thoughts, and release without judgement.

What helps you stay out of your head and in the moment during intimacy? Share your go-to-tip below!👇

Spectatoring: The Thoughts We Struggle to Share After Intimacy Pauses ✋When spectatoring takes over, it can leave both p...
05/01/2025

Spectatoring: The Thoughts We Struggle to Share After Intimacy Pauses ✋

When spectatoring takes over, it can leave both partners wondering and worrying in silence:
💭 "Did I ruin the moment?"
💭 "Was it something I did?"
💭 "How do I explain what happened?"

Spectatoring can cause psychological detachment (i.e., shifting to the perspective of an outsider to one's own intimate experience), impact of physical response (i.e., lack of arousal, difficulty with body functioning, ability to reach O), anxiety and stress, internal dialogue (i.e., self-monitoring about performance, partner satisfaction), disconnection from partner (i.e., emotional distance) and broader implications (i.e., low sexu@l confidence, satisfaction and/or desire).

These unspoken reflections can create change in the relationship, but they don't have to. Opening up about what's going on - whether it's self-doubt, distraction, or something else - can bring understanding and connection back into the moment.

Your thoughts are valid, and so is your partner's. Take the first step by starting the conversation. 💕

Have you ever experienced these unspoken moments? How do you navigate them with your partner? Share your thoughts below! 👇

Mind in the Moment: 9 Common Distractions During Intimacy 🧠❤️‍🔥Intimacy isn't just physical connection - it's about ment...
04/01/2025

Mind in the Moment: 9 Common Distractions During Intimacy 🧠❤️‍🔥

Intimacy isn't just physical connection - it's about mental presence too. But what happens when your mind starts to wander? From performance pressure to worries about past experiences, there are many distractions that can pull us out of the moment.

Understanding the 9 types of distracting thoughts during s*x can help you navigate them with more awareness and compassion.

Remember: it's okay to have these thoughts, but it's how we manage them that makes all the difference.

Have you experienced any of these distractions during intimacy? Which one resonates with you most? Comment below. 👇

Exploring Sensation Play: A Journey of Pleasure and Discovery 🔎Sensation play invites you to explore all the senses - si...
31/12/2024

Exploring Sensation Play: A Journey of Pleasure and Discovery 🔎

Sensation play invites you to explore all the senses - sight, sound, smell, taste and touch in a way that deepens intimacy and enhances pleasure. This practice is all about tuning into the body, building anticipation, heightening arousal and fostering deeper connection.

What sensations do you find most alluring and sensual? Share your thoughts or questions below! 👇

Wrapping up 2024 with so much gratitude—for new beginnings, deep connections, and the privilege of this work. Here’s to ...
20/12/2024

Wrapping up 2024 with so much gratitude—for new beginnings, deep connections, and the privilege of this work. Here’s to more growth and learning in 2025!

❓True or False: You Can Lose Your Virgin*ty by M*sturbating? ❓Virgin*ty is not a medical or scientific term - it's a soc...
20/12/2024

❓True or False: You Can Lose Your Virgin*ty by M*sturbating? ❓

Virgin*ty is not a medical or scientific term - it's a social construct designed to control when and how people (especially those with vulv*s) engage in s*xual activity. The concept of "losing your virgin*ty" is rooted in patriarchy, used to enforce the idea of saving yourself for "the one". But here's the truth: it doesn't exist. There is no part of your body that is "virgin*ty". If it were about body parts, then why does it not apply to people with 🍆?

Instead of focusing on outdated ideas of virgin*ty, let's talk about sexual debut - a personal, empowering choice that is unique to each individual. Your s*xual debut is yours to define, free from societal pressure.

How do you feel about the concept of virgin*ty? Let's chat about how we can reshape these outdated scripts! 👇

🔎 "How to Quit P**n" - A Common Search, A Shared StruggleThe search for "how to quit p🌽rn" is a frequently searched topi...
19/12/2024

🔎 "How to Quit P**n" - A Common Search, A Shared Struggle

The search for "how to quit p🌽rn" is a frequently searched topic online, highlighting the widespread challenge many people face in managing their relationship with p**nography. This issue is far more prevalent than we may realise, and it's clear that many are seeking guidance and support. You're not alone in this. 💻

Struggling with p**n use isn't a sign of failure - it's a reflection of how widespread and complex this issue has become in society. If you're navigating this, professional support is available.

Book an appointment for individualised, evidenced-based care to help you address this concern with understanding, compassion and practical strategies for lasting change.

What do you think is behind the rise in searches like this? Share your thoughts below! 👇

How Well Do You Know Your Anatomy? 🧠✨Genti@l literacy is more than just basic anatomy - it’s about understanding your bo...
18/12/2024

How Well Do You Know Your Anatomy? 🧠✨

Genti@l literacy is more than just basic anatomy - it’s about understanding your body and feeling empowered by that knowledge. Could you confidently label the pen*s or the clitor*s? Surprisingly, only 63% of people can correctly identify the clitor*s on a diagram. That’s astounding, given it is essential pleasure organ for half the population! 🤯

Knowing these structures can improve sexu@l health, pleasure, and communication. So, how would you rate your genit@l literacy? 🤔

Drop a 🧠 in the comment if you’re ready to learn more or tag a friend who needs this reminder!

📚 Everything You Didn't Know about the Pen*s 🍆An accessible, fact-filled resource that covers everything from anatomy to...
17/12/2024

📚 Everything You Didn't Know about the Pen*s 🍆

An accessible, fact-filled resource that covers everything from anatomy to sexu*l function, and health concerns. Recommended for any client who wants to feel more informed and confident about 🍆 anatomy.

Have you read any books that gave you a whole new perspective on sexu*l health? Share your recommendations below! 👇

Fletcha, my Belgian Malinois Shepherd. He gives zero fcks and takes no prisoners.
16/12/2024

Fletcha, my Belgian Malinois Shepherd. He gives zero fcks and takes no prisoners.

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