05/03/2026
I travel a lot since moving to Sydney. It provides the flexibility to come home and run a clinic several times a year as well as plenty of gorgeous places to explore within a 6 hour flight radius. However, along with that I’m developing a paralysing fear of airports. Not planes but the process of checking in and going through airport security. I feel more and more that impending sense of doom as I head to the airport and by the time I’m checking in it’s hitting my diaphragm and all I want to do is head straight home and hunker down with my family. It’s getting harder and harder to leave them.
Lots of people have a fear of flying, I’ve never understood it myself being an avid traveller and loving the discovery of new and different places. However, I’ve been known to book flights to the wrong city, miss planes after taking my family to the wrong gate, order the wrong visas. We have been turned away from flying for not having a spare page in the back of a passport (the man) and have had a swat team descend on us going through security after a knife accidentally appeared in a pair of shoes not long after 9/11 with my arabic man carrying a temporary passport (again the man - don’t ask me how we got out of that one).
Today I had a shed ton of anxiety from the moment I woke up - was it mine? Who knows but I’m seeing it popping up in clients and the one thing I know is that it doesn’t come from nowhere. We don’t just have random panic attacks because we are sensitive - anxiety, sweating, fear and impending doom are all symptoms that the sympathetic nervous system is in full swing. The body is sensing danger and it’s not until we look at the root cause of it that we can begin to truly address it. Although all those things above have happened to me, the deeper components are rooted in childhood with a deep fear of getting it wrong - doing the wrong thing, making people angry. As I grow in visibility and become better known, this fear is swinging back round for me to take another look at. It’s the reason I’ve stayed hidden in my clinic for so long - after all visibility always makes you a target. I’ve had to really thicken up my skin and drop my people pleasing persona to grow and it’s been hard! But the soul wants what the soul wants and I’m having to get stuck back in to ‘The Work’. Another layer to shed. We’ve all got them.
This time I have the interment of my brother’s ashes followed by a wedding - such an interesting juxtaposition to hold in one trip. If you are suffering right now from anxiety, depression, fear, get stuck into somer deep inner work. Nothing is more challenging or more rewarding because that work will open up your field to the abundance you seek and enable you to be the light for others.
Kia kaha and Mauri ora
Arohanui
Melly
www.atmellyrose.com
Or come visit me at the Forest Healing Festival up north: https://www.foresthealingfestival.org/