11/12/2025
Someone once described a family as being like a hedgehog: too close, and they prick each other; too far apart, and they struggle to survive. This analogy feels especially poignant with Christmas approaching. For some, the inability to be close to family can be deeply isolating. For others, being in constant proximity, especially in homes that don't feel safe is overwhelming and very unsettling.
Children can emotionally disconnect from their families while still being physically present. 😔 When a family system is under stress, the natural tendency is to stabilise the situation. Often, this leads to rigid thinking, controlling behaviours, and strained communication. As parents, this might come across as being overly bossy or feeling like the children are ungrateful, disrespectful, or simply not listening. Christmas time can definitely add stress to a family system.
While we can’t always control the external stressors impacting our family, we can change how we respond to them. The key is to soften the edges. This means being flexible with the stories we tell ourselves, lowering expectations, letting go of guilt, and prioritising self-care, kindness, and gratitude for ourselves and those around us.
Why not add a dose of silliness to your family’s routine? Dance, sing, change up your usual dinner spot, write each other notes, or start a family yoga session. These small shifts can help ease the stress response and create moments of connection. You might even consider starting a new family ritual- something that sparks laughter and keeps everyone close without the “prickly” moments.
As the season changes and the long holiday approaches, I hope you find time to nurture fun and closeness with your family. Do you have a favourite family activity or ritual that brings everyone together? Share your ideas below to inspire others!