10/28/2024
Woke up to a cool 0° today so this seems a topical share! Thanks to Autistic Typing for the helpful info.
Do you have a hard time convincing a certain person to wear a winter coat?
This is a common winter frustration for parents, teachers, and caregivers.
Fear not, a person with Winter Coat Avoidance is here to explain what this is, why this is, and what you can do about it!
It is very likely that the person in your life who refuses to wear a winter coat does not feel a need for a winter coat. That's the simple explanation. The sensory experience of wearing a winter coat is worse than the sensory experience of not wearing a coat. They are not refusing because they want to be difficult or disobedient. They are refusing because winter coats are hard.
A lot of people with sensory differences have troubles with one of the senses called interoception. They feel things differently than a person who has typical sensory experiences. Just like we shouldn't say "the lights aren't too bright" to a person with sensory differences, we shouldn't say "you are not warm enough" to a person with sensory differences.
Interoception is one of the 9+ senses. Yes, there are more than five! They didn't teach us that in elementary school, but I'm not making it up.
Interoception is the sense of feeling what's going on in your body. Interoception is the sense that is going to tell us if we're too hot or too cold. Interoception is going to tell us if we have a belly ache or if our foot is asleep. It is how we experience the feelings within our own body. If I'm not cold, I'm not cold, no matter how many times someone asks, "aren't you cold?" (Please stop asking.)
Winter jackets are bulky and restrictive. This can impede other senses, like proprioception or vestibular senses.
Winter coats are meant to be warm, they are not often made to be flexible and pliable.
A winter coat with shoulders that are too tight feels like I'm being restrained. A winter coat that doesn't allow free movement can make me feel like I'm in danger, because it slows my response time. It may make me feel like I'm going to fall over, because it prevents me from using my body to balance.
All that to say - the discomfort of the coat is worse than the discomfort of the cold.
That's a lot of words for "why." And you might not really care "why" when you just want the person to wear a coat when it's cold outside. So what can you do about it? As with all things neurodivergent, it depends on the individual.
Adapt
Adapting to the person's sensory needs will reduce (although not eliminate) the person's avoidance of winter coats.
Find a winter coat that the person feels comfortable in, which includes ample space in the shoulder area. Choose something with stretchy fabric, like neoprene, rather than nylon.
Provide layers of flexible lighter apparel that can be layered and worn as needed.
Fleece under a windbreaker is about as warm as a typical winter coat.
If it's windy, but not cold, a windbreaker might be enough.
If it is cold, but not windy, a fleece zip-up might be enough.
Evaluate
Evaluate if your perspective is based on facts or how you believe a person should feel.
If it is cool, and above freezing temperatures, there is a low risk of injury from being outside unless you're outside for a long time.
If it is below freezing temperatures, there is a higher risk of injury. It is more important that the person be protected from the cold.
Do you think a coat is important because of the judgment you may face from people who do not understand?
Inform and share concerns
Inform yourself and the Winter Coat Avoidant person of actual risk. Print a copy of the National Weather Service windchill chart and post it by the door. Use a thermometer by the door to help guide decision making.
Instead of explaining that a person should feel cold, explain the facts. One way to inform is "It is 10 degrees Fahrenheit and it is windy right now. This is well below the freezing point. It is dangerous to be in these temperatures for more than a couple of minutes, because you could get frostbite or hypothermia."
In my personal experience, I have even shared with my child that I am afraid that someone may call the police on me for them not wearing a coat in the winter. This is a real concern for BIPOC caregivers especially.
Negotiate
If the risk is low, but you'd feel more comfortable if they have a jacket available, negotiate bringing a jacket to put on if it becomes necessary.
If the risk is higher, and they'll be outside only for a minute, for example to walk to/from a warmed vehicle, offer other options. One option could be to wear the coat only over the shoulders and not put the arms in the sleeves. Another option would be to use a blanket to stay warm while walking to/from the warm vehicle.
If the risk is higher, negotiate the time spent outside. Tell them that if it is too risky, they can't go outside without a coat, but if they'd like to go outside for a shorter amount of time, they won't have to wear the jacket as long.
These negotiations are incredibly important because not only do they help the person make informed decisions, it also helps people to learn the process of making safe decisions.
ID: pink and purple background with a graphic of an orange coat and orange mittens with thumbs down. Neon blue and purple text reads "winter coats are hard."
