Soul Healing with Michelle

09/06/2023

09/04/2023

It has been one of the most challenging years I think I have ever had. I’m so thankful that I got a couple weeks of reprieve this summer, as it seems I needed it before this current round of chaos.

This year seems to be bringing up past experiences and many are repeating from having family struggling with serious mental health and suicidal attempts, members with legal involvement, family with addictions, having close relationship break ups that impacted our entire family, 2 very serious vehicle accidents and a couple just causing vehicle damages, 2 of my kids and one “adopted” moved out within a couple weeks of each other. 2 physical assaults, 2 big forest fires that have impacted 3 different family members, and now our landlord has let us know he will be putting the house up for sale.

After 9 years of raising our kids in the same house, we were not expecting to move at least not until Trea graduated. With only 2 years left before he graduates it’s going to be a big change.

To increase the stress, it is extremely hard to find current rentals with the already lack of places, the increase of people affected by the fires and also needing housing. Add on 2 dogs and a cat and the struggle is that much harder.
Had we known that this was coming we would have figured out a way to buy before the prices skyrocketed.

The whole idea of being in a place of being homeless scares me more than anything I have experienced.

I know everything happens for a reason, and that everything happens the way it is supposed to, but dang this year has challenged me beyond what I could prepare for.

I’m definitely feeling overwhelmed and uncertain😟

How many of you have been challenged This year?

08/05/2023

All so often I see the depths of people experiencing trauma and I do everything in my being to be the support they need. I have met people with some sad, traumatic and some horrific experiences. I have watched the grief, loss, depression, and the pain of their past. Never wanting anyone to feel alone in these circumstances I would never give it a second thought to be a support.

The thing I didn’t think of is that all the traumas of my past could come into the equation. I had been diagnosed with C-PTSD a number of years ago, and I have worked hard to overcome many of the challenges that has come with it.
However in the last 9 months I have been challenged to the point it has re triggered many past traumas, emotions and symptoms.
I forgot my own advice and how important self care is. You cannot help anyone when your drowning yourself. You can not fill other people’s cups when yours is empty. But yet here I was trying to fill every cup in front of me and I was drowning.

So what did I do?

I went camping for 2 weeks straight, by myself. I did a lot of soul searching and processing. Plus I didn’t have to take care of anyone or anything except myself.

Did it fix my issues?

Nope, but it definitely has allowed my cup to start refilling. What it did do was help me to clarify my own roles in each situation, to look for patterns of where these things have happened before and where I need to put up my own boundaries.

The reason I’m sharing this is because I know that there are a lot of people out there struggling right now. I know many people will hide their trauma, will put up a wall as to not be “hurt/grieving” again.
I know how it feels to struggle everyday and also have the stigma in many system, where most people are dismissed. I want others to be able to talk openly about what they are experiencing and receive the support they need.
And for me to be able to suggest this to others, I have to also have a voice and say I’m experiencing some major life events and I’m doing everything in my power to keep my head above water (at this moment in time, as I know things won’t always be this triggering).

If I have been silent lately it’s solely because I’m taking the self care I constantly tell others they need. And once I fill my cup back up I will be a better version of me and able to respond to everyone.

Remember you never have to struggle alone There are so many others who can help support you. 💖💖💖

04/22/2023

https://www.facebook.com/reel/718602813192339?fs=e&s=TIeQ9V&mibextid=tejx2t

04/20/2023

Sometimes our hearts get broken. Sometimes we don’t understand the trauma. Sometimes we need to have our lives completely torn down, so we can rebuild it to our higher potential.

Every event that occurs offers us the ability on how we are going to respond and what knowledge we are taking forward to ensure we don’t repeat old patterns.

Take the time to reflect on what parts you played in a situation, what you are wanting for your future, and what changes you can make as to prevent a repeating pattern.

Most importantly self care should be your priority. You can’t support others if your not running on a full battery. Heal yourself and others will see your worth.

04/16/2023