04/29/2026
One of the most common misunderstandings about limits is confusing them with demands, ultimatums, or control. A limit is about what you need and what you will do. It's not about dictating what your partner does.
Telling them to stop something is a demand. Threatening to leave if they don't change is an ultimatum. Controlling who they see is not a limit, it's control. These things might come from a real and valid need, but they're not the same thing as a healthy limit.
A real limit says "I need this" not "you must do this."
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