31/10/2022
Several years ago, when I had people pleasing tendencies, I would always try to do the most for others. No matter who it was, I found myself giving a lot of my time, energy and effort for others so they feel supported and loved.
The intention was good, but I self-sacrificed myself. I always put myself last.
What happened? I was always dying for thirst — in the unhealthy places.
Yet in reality, I deeply wanted that support within myself. But because I didn’t know how to give, I found myself searching for it externally. The more I gave to them, I thought — they’ll give that back.
But because I gave so much, I became disappointed in their efforts, I felt like it wasn’t ever enough (because of how much I gave). 😅
The more I blamed them (instead of looking at myself), I started to give even more of myself and became even angier — funny looking back, as I thought that the same formula would yield different results.
But after constant outputting, it still didn’t work.
But here’s one secret I discovered: when we get angry at others from a place of expectation, it doesn’t have to do anything with them… but ourselves.
I had to go back within and look at myself.
💔Why did I give so much away?
💔Why did I believe that self-abandonment meant healthy relationships?
I had to let go of my stories around these expectations I gave to others and myself. I had to find why I was operating this way, what I was in fear of… I had to observe my thoughts to find out what’s happening.
Because when you let these stories go, you start to understand that you didnt have to work for anyone’s love.
It was about you giving that type of love to yourself and others would naturally compliment that same energy back.
When you lean into your authentic self-worth, you’ll see that you don’t need to prove yourself or your worth to anyone.
When you lean into your authentic self-worth, you’ll see that you don’t need to chase for someone.
Apply to my 1:1 to find how you can break you chains. It’s time to stop chasing. ⛓