11/14/2025
Can I get some advice? ⤵️ ❤️
A year ago today, my mom had a stroke. It wasn’t the day she died (that came 13 long days at the bedside later) but it was the day that I knew with 100% certainty she had moved from “late life” to “end of life”.
I’ve learned alot in this past year. Our “grief anniversaries” don’t always fall on the date of death has been a KEY learning!
Sometimes it’s the day of the diagnosis, the fall, the call from the care home that hold the sneakiest kind of grief.
I’m totally noticing how guilt after loss and complicated grief has snuck up on me.
I sometimes wonder if I did enough for her before the stroke, during those long years in care.
Then there’s the fact she died on my dad’s birthday. Again, no f@&king fairy-tale. It has kind of made me extra stressed to be honest!
Do you have your own pre-grief milestone? Or something that complicates a death anniversary for you?
I’d really love some advice. This date for me isn’t something I will mark on a calendar, but I swear to god it’s showing up in my body.
