Positive Change Counselling

11/04/2025

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10/27/2025

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10/26/2025

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10/23/2025

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10/23/2025

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Boundaries are about protecting ourselves, however they still allow us the ability to create and maintain connections with others.

Walls are defenses that prevent us us from being able to relate intimately with others.

“I really need an hour of alone time when I get home from work before I can connect” .. is an example of a relational boundary.

When someone takes that time to nourish themselves, it would ideally allow them to connect after that time.

They would be able to re-connect because their boundary and their needs were honored.

Note: This is just an example being used to make this point.

If they don’t ever come back to you, or fail to ever invest emotionally, there might be other things present.

People can sometimes unknowingly have walls up because they have deep fears or a low tolerance for closeness.

I still would never suggest assuming any of this.

I would invite a collaborative discussion.

Exploring whether walls may be present in a relationship with someone is vital.

Walls protects one person, but at the cost of relational connection with the other person.

“I really understand and support your need to spend time alone after work. I respect your needs. I’d love if you’d be willing to check in with me afterward so that I also can feel connected to you.”

People who have strong avoidant tendencies can sometimes become rigid with their boundaries.

That rigid approach makes sense given the fact that they may have had to learn to tend to themselves under stress.

It makes sense that having someone ask them for intimacy and relational compromise can feel overwhelming and even sometimes invasive.

Relating intimately can feel extremely foreign and risky.

Honoring our personal limits is essential.

And if connection and intimacy is what we’re truly seeking, then exploring relational avoidance is a must so that connection and vulnerability can be made possible again.
// Silvy Khoucasian

PS: Want to explore working together? Message me “work with me” to book a free consultation ✨

10/21/2025

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10/21/2025

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Hydrate.
Sleep.
Rest.

Take good care of yourself.

10/20/2025

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A little reminder from your friendly neighbourhood frogs 🐸✨

Save this for when your brain is being mean, and come back to grab what you need most 🫶🌈

10/17/2025