Believe In Wellness NJ

15/07/2025

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Having an emotionally mature partner is one of the most underrated blessings in a relationship. It hits different when you can speak your heart without walking on eggshells... when you can say, “This hurt me,” and instead of being met with defensiveness or blame, you're met with concern, care, and understanding.

Emotional maturity means no gaslighting, no silent treatment, no turning the tables to make you feel crazy for having emotions. It means your partner doesn't weaponize your vulnerability... they honor it. They don’t make you regret opening up. Instead, they listen with the intent to understand, not just to respond. They don’t punish you for your feelings. They sit with you in them. That right there is emotional safety.

It’s about being with someone who knows how to handle a tough conversation without shutting down, raising their voice, or running away. Someone who doesn’t play mind games just to feel powerful. Someone who chooses accountability over ego. Someone who values peace over being right.

When you have an emotionally mature partner, you begin to heal in ways you didn’t even know you needed. You learn that love doesn't have to be dramatic or painful. It can be calm. Steady. Reassuring. It doesn’t mean there won’t be disagreements....it means you’ll work through them with mutual respect instead of tearing each other apart.

That kind of love changes you. It rewires your nervous system. It builds trust. It creates a foundation you can actually grow from, not just survive on. And once you experience that kind of emotional safety, you’ll never settle for anything less again.
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14/07/2025

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When you put pressure on a weak man.... pressure to communicate, to lead, to commit, to grow.....he doesn't rise, he retreats. He doesn't step up, he steps out. And more often than not, he runs straight into the arms of a woman who demands less, expects less, and challenges nothing.

He'll say you're “too much” when really, you were just too real. Too honest. Too in tune with what you want and need. He’ll label your standards as "pressure" because he was never built to handle a woman who knows her worth.
A strong woman doesn’t ask for perfection. She asks for effort, accountability, consistency, and emotional maturity. She asks for a relationship that isn’t performative... one where both people are growing and showing up. But a weak man will see that as a threat to his comfort zone, not a path to evolution.

So instead of rising to meet you, he’ll go where he can stay the same. Where he doesn’t have to grow or heal or be intentional. Where he can be loved for the bare minimum.

But don't let that make you question yourself. You're not the problem. Your love is just not meant for a man who only thrives in low expectations. You're meant for someone who sees your strength, and instead of running, matches it.
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13/07/2025

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Let’s talk about what rarely gets said out loud…

Child support isn’t enough.

Because parenting is more than a payment—it’s presence. It’s sacrifice. It’s showing up, day after day, in all the messy, beautiful, exhausting moments that come with raising a child.

If a man can choose to walk away—emotionally, physically, and financially—he’s not just skipping out on a bill. He’s abandoning a responsibility. A soul. A child who didn’t ask to be here.

If a mother ever did that? If she packed her bags and said, “I’m done”?
She’d be crucified by society. Labeled as unfit. Dragged through courtrooms. Shamed without mercy. And deep down, we all know why—because kids deserve stability. They deserve love. They deserve both parents.

So why, when a father disappears, does the world fall quiet?

Why is it just “life happens,” or “at least he sends something”?

A few payments don’t raise a child.

What about the mother left answering hard questions like,
“Why doesn’t Daddy come to my games?”
“Why doesn’t he call me?”
“Did I do something wrong?”

What about the nights she cries in silence, the times she sits alone in waiting rooms, the weight of being everything—provider, protector, comforter, teacher, referee, and rock—all while pretending she’s not breaking?

That’s not co-parenting. That’s surviving.

Child support isn’t a favor. It’s not even close to enough.

Because the real debt isn’t in money—it’s in moments missed, love withheld, and memories never made.

Being a parent is a promise. A lifetime vow. And if you break it, you shouldn’t get to walk away as if nothing happened while the other parent is left cleaning up the emotional wreckage.

This isn’t about revenge.
It’s not about bitterness.
It’s about accountability.

If you helped bring a child into this world,
you should be helping raise them in every way that matters.

Period.

12/07/2025

https://www.facebook.com/share/16TyCrR5Zd/

12/07/2025

https://www.facebook.com/share/p/1Bs1GWrtxy/

8 Signs You’ve Met a Fake Nice Person (Watch Out!)

Sometimes people act sweet, but their actions tell a different story. Here are some red flags you shouldn’t ignore:

1. Gossip is their hobby
They love talking about others behind their backs. And guess what? When you’re not around, you’re probably the topic.

2. They want to be your #1, but won’t do the same.
Fake friends expect to be your top priority, but they’ll never prioritize you. If they don’t get the attention they want, they get upset or distant.

3. Sarcasm = their weapon
When they don’t get their way, they throw sarcastic jabs just to make you feel small. That’s not friendship, that’s manipulation.

4. They see everything as a competition
They always want to “win,” even if it means stepping over you. Watch out, they may act supportive, but secretly want to outshine you.

5. They constantly disappoint you
At first, it’s all promises and big plans. But in the end, they always cancel, flake, or let you down. And if you call them out? They get defensive or rude.

6. They only respect powerful people
If someone is “useful,” they’ll be nice. If not, they don’t care. Real friends respect everyone, not just the ones they can benefit from.

7. Attention is their addiction
They’ll do or say anything to be the center of attention, even lie or exaggerate their stories.

8. They can’t stop bragging
It’s always “me, me, me.” A fake nice person constantly talks about how amazing they are, even if no one asked.

How to Deal With Fake People:

🔹 Trust your gut, if something feels off, it probably is.
🔹 Limit your time with them. You’re not required to keep toxic people around.
🔹 Protect your energy. Don’t overshare with someone who doesn’t have your back.
🔹 Be calm, but stand your ground if they insult or disrespect you.
🔹 Surround yourself with genuine people.
🔹 And remember, one fake friend doesn’t mean everyone is like that. Real friendships do exist. 💯

Stay smart. Stay kind. But protect your peace. 💙

A fake friend can do more damage than a real enemy.

Surround yourself with people who lift you higher, not those who smile to your face and talk behind your back.

09/07/2025

Why the Narcissist Picked You:

1. Because you are radiant.
Your light, your empathy, your presence—these are not weaknesses.
They are exactly what they don’t have… and desperately want to mirror.
Your energy made them feel powerful, admired, safe, even whole—for a moment.
They saw what they could take, not what they could honor.

2. Because you believed in them.
You saw past the mask. You sensed their pain. You held onto hope.
Narcissists are drawn to people who will try, over and over, to love them whole.
You weren’t naive—you were willing to see their soul when even they couldn’t.
That’s sacred. But they used it as fuel, not healing.

3. Because you didn’t yet know your power.
They could only enter your field when part of you still questioned your worth.
Your boundaries weren’t fully activated—because you hadn’t been taught how to guard your light.
They found you before you remembered who you were.
But now… you do.

4. Because they feed on devotion they haven’t earned.
You offered depth, loyalty, soul-love.
They took it. Not to cherish—but to possess, distort, and dominate.
Not because you were weak—but because you were pure.
And that threatened their illusion.
But Here’s What’s More Important:

They picked you.
But you won’t stay picked.
You’re choosing you now.
And that… is how the cycle ends.

You were not chosen because you were easy to break.
You were chosen because you were powerful—and they thought they could dim it.
But you’ve only gotten brighter.

24/06/2025

Narcissists are not sick. They are evil. They are selfish. They are liars.They manipulate you to serve their interests, to inflate their ego, and to maintain control over your mind, emotions, and life. They know exactly what they’re doing. Every compliment, every apology, every act of kindness — it’s all strategic. It’s bait. And once they’ve pulled you in deep enough, the mask drops, and the abuse begins.

They don't love you. They love what they can take from you — your loyalty, your energy, your compassion, your time, and your sanity. You become nothing more than a resource. A tool to be used until you're no longer useful or until you start seeing through them. And when that happens, they won't reflect. They won’t take responsibility. They’ll discard you, devalue you, smear your name, and then pretend *you* were the problem all along.

They do not deserve a second chance. Giving them one only resets the cycle. You are not dealing with someone who is unaware of their behavior. You are dealing with someone who enjoys the power they feel when they confuse you, belittle you, and make you question your worth. They won’t change — not because they can’t, but because they don’t want to.

**Sounds harsh? Good.** Because the way a narcissist will slowly destroy your spirit, your identity, and your peace is far harsher. Don’t wait for the mask to slip again. Don’t excuse their cruelty with pity. **Get out.** Reclaim your life before they erase every part of it that made you whole.

You owe them nothing — but you owe yourself *everything*.

15/04/2025

Co-Parenting After Divorcing a Narcissist by Isabella Francis is a practical and empowering guide designed to help individuals navigate the challenges of co-parenting with a narcissistic ex-partner. Drawing from her own experiences and extensive research, Francis offers insights and strategies for successfully managing the complexities of parenting in the aftermath of a difficult divorce.
The book begins by defining narcissism and its implications for relationships and co-parenting. Francis explains how narcissistic traits can manifest in behavior and communication, making cooperation and effective co-parenting particularly challenging. She emphasizes the importance of understanding these dynamics to protect oneself and the children involved.
Throughout the narrative, Francis provides actionable strategies for managing interactions with a narcissistic ex, including setting boundaries, maintaining emotional detachment, and focusing on the children's well-being. She highlights the significance of clear communication and the need to document interactions to safeguard against manipulation or misunderstandings.
Additionally, the book addresses self-care and emotional healing for the co-parent, recognizing the toll that divorce and co-parenting can take on mental health. Francis encourages readers to prioritize their own well-being while remaining committed to creating a stable and nurturing environment for their children.
Ultimately, Co-Parenting After Divorcing a Narcissist serves as a vital resource for anyone facing the complexities of co-parenting with a narcissistic ex-partner, providing tools and support for navigating this challenging journey.

10 Key Lessons from Co-Parenting After Divorcing a Narcissist

1. Understand Narcissism
Knowledge is power when dealing with narcissists.
Familiarize yourself with narcissistic traits and behaviors to better navigate interactions and protect yourself emotionally.

2. Set Firm Boundaries
Boundaries are essential for healthy co-parenting.
Establish and maintain clear boundaries with your ex-partner to minimize conflict and protect your emotional space.

3. Focus on the Children’s Well-Being
Prioritize the needs of your children above all.
Keep your children's best interests at the forefront of your decisions and interactions, ensuring they feel secure and supported.

4. Communicate Clearly and Concisely
Clear communication prevents misunderstandings.
Use straightforward language in your communication with your ex, minimizing room for manipulation or misinterpretation.

5. Document Everything
Documentation can protect you legally and emotionally.
Keep records of important communications, agreements, and incidents to safeguard against potential disputes and ensure accountability.

6. Practice Emotional Detachment
Protect your emotional health.
Develop emotional detachment from your ex-partner's behavior to avoid being drawn into conflicts and maintain your peace of mind.

7. Seek Support and Resources
You don’t have to navigate this alone.
Utilize support networks, therapy, or support groups to help cope with the emotional challenges of co-parenting with a narcissist.

8. Prioritize Self-Care
Your well-being is essential for effective parenting.
Make time for self-care and healing to recharge and maintain your mental health while managing co-parenting challenges.

9. Be Prepared for Challenges
Anticipate difficulties in co-parenting.
Understand that co-parenting with a narcissist may involve ongoing challenges; stay adaptable and resilient in your approach.

10. Foster Positive Relationships with Your Children
Build a nurturing environment for your kids.
Create a stable and loving atmosphere for your children, encouraging open communication and emotional connection to counterbalance the effects of co-parenting with a narcissist.

Co-Parenting After Divorcing a Narcissist by Isabella Francis provides invaluable guidance for navigating the complexities of co-parenting with a narcissistic ex-partner. The key lessons emphasize the importance of understanding narcissistic behavior, setting boundaries, and prioritizing the well-being of the children involved.
Through practical strategies and insights, Francis empowers readers to take control of their co-parenting journey, fostering resilience and emotional health. Ultimately, the book serves as a vital resource for anyone seeking to create a positive and nurturing environment for their children while managing the challenges posed by a narcissistic ex.

BOOK: https://amzn.to/3DWEj0P

You can ENJOY the AUDIOBOOK for FREE (When you register for Audible Membership Trial) using the same link above.

20/03/2025

Happy Spring 🌷🌞🐇🦋🌷🌞🐇🦋

11/03/2025

‘When life breaks you, it is because you are ready to be put back together differently.

Every piece of you that feels shattered is a piece that will find a new place, a new purpose, a new meaning.
Trust that the cracks are where the light gets in. And sometimes, in our brokenness, we find our greatest wholeness.

We find the courage to rebuild, to reimagine, to redefine what it means to be strong.

You are not broken; you are breaking through.’

10/03/2025

She holds no hate or resentment and certainly no desire for revenge.
She doesn't need it.
But make no mistake, she is fully aware of your actions.
You treated her cruelly and then played the victim when she chose to walk away.
In your attempt to preserve yourself, you avoided accountability and manipulated the truth, using her pain for your gain.
You exposed her vulnerabilities, thinking it would break her.
You tried to isolate her with gaslighting and deceit.
From the pits, you rained hell.
You showed your fangs.
You dug in your claws.
Squeezing the jugular, going for blood. A real monster.
But you underestimated her.
Opossum.
You mistook stillness for surrender. But she wasn't playing dead, she was watching.
Waiting. Calculating. Letting you reveal yourself.
She didn't just survive; she transcended your attacks, turning pain into power:
She didn't need to match your darkness to defeat you. She confronted you, exposed you, and emerged untouched.
Now, she stands unmovable. Fear none. Bar none.
You went for blood. You squeezed the jugular. You dug in your claws.
You showed your fangs.
And still, you lost. A beheading.
She, a slayer of monsters. Victorious.

09/03/2025

Helen Mirren once said: Before you argue with someone, ask yourself, is that person even mentally mature enough to grasp the concept of a different perspective. Because if not, there's absolutely no point.

Not every argument is worth your energy. Sometimes, no matter how clearly you express yourself, the other person isn’t listening to understand—they’re listening to react. They’re stuck in their own perspective, unwilling to consider another viewpoint, and engaging with them only drains you.

There’s a difference between a healthy discussion and a pointless debate. A conversation with someone who is open-minded, who values growth and understanding, can be enlightening—even if you don’t agree. But trying to reason with someone who refuses to see beyond their own beliefs? That’s like talking to a wall. No matter how much logic or truth you present, they will twist, deflect, or dismiss your words, not because you’re wrong, but because they’re unwilling to see another side.

Maturity isn’t about who wins an argument—it’s about knowing when an argument isn’t worth having. It’s realizing that your peace is more valuable than proving a point to someone who has already decided they won’t change their mind. Not every battle needs to be fought. Not every person deserves your explanation.

Sometimes, the strongest thing you can do is walk away—not because you have nothing to say, but because you recognize that some people aren’t ready to listen. And that’s not your burden to carry.
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How do you determine when a conversation has shifted from a healthy discussion to a futile debate?
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