23/02/2021
I was working with a client who felt guilty for ALL the things she had done to their kids, speaking of fighting with her partner, letting them see the unhealthy model of relationship, causing them pain, hurt, not being able to be the present, a perfect mother who loves playing, for working too much, not baking enough, feeling so stressed out and anxious...
She had this constant nagging going on in her mind. She was worried about everything all the time.
Slowly but surely her guilt bucket was overflowing.
She had started believing she was doing things wrong... that she was wrong... thinking how "bad" she was, how she was not doing enough, and then too much, thinking of all the things she said, thought and didn't say or do...
She desperately tried to keep all the balls rolling while escaping and hiding the bad habits, thoughts and feelings that kept haunting her more and more.
😕 Of course... she tried to numb the feelings with overworking, overdoing, wine and focused on prioritizing everyone else’s needs except her own.
😕 Of course... all that giving giving giving, the unhealthy need to be earning the good, love, recognition, and attention and made her so anxious, angry, jealous, and resentful that added up the pressure in her relationships.
We circled back to talking about the guilt she carried.
She said she doesn’t really believe she could release it, she felt it was part of her and us, mothers.
So I said,
“Guilt is not coming with motherhood. It’s not supposed to be part of it or part of you, there is no such thing as mom's guilt.
It is an emotion.
If it’s getting too overwhelming, lowering your confidence and self-esteem, ability to make decisions, causing issues as it does, it shows there are some blocks behind it that we can address and heal."
She was surprised about my answer. She couldn't believe she could be free from these emotions. Her ego-mind loudly resisting the change.
Sometimes we need to keep breaking the ice and peel the onion until people are ready to stop protecting them with the self-sabotaging patterns, addictions, anger, resentment, anxiety, criticism... which are only aiming to keep them safe in the same, familiar, trying to avoid the pain and hurt from the past. This is actually preventing them to change, have pleasure, happiness- clarity.
----These emotions are an unhealthy survival mechanism. ----
People who are suffering from guilt are often extremely hard and critical of themselves (and others), blaming themselves for any mistakes without being able to let go, they overcontrol, they aim to strive for perfectionism that exhausts them.
Because it feels scary let go, and change, take responsibility- they hide and wish they could be their true selves who doesn't need to hide or play any roles.
Most people simply don't even know, yet believe, there are tools and methods on how to release the emotional issues, so they could feel better, balanced, and have their desires and needs met.
IF YOU READY TO OVERCOME GUILT, TOO MUCH WORRYING- HERE'S WHAT'S NEEDED:
Become aware of it- in your mind, thoughts, and how it affects your behavior.
* How does it serve you to stay how you are?
* What would become possible for you if become free from it?
* Trackback in the past and connect with the past events:
* Who did you learn that from?
* Whose energy is that?
* Forgive for yourself.
* Connect and heal the inner child & giving her the attention and
love what she needs, and only you can give to her.
Forgiveness is an essential part when healing guilt. It doesn't mean you would accept things that people have done to you but it helps you to set yourself free from that baggage that only you carry.
If you are ready to dive in and feel better, more accepting, and stop worrying so much about everything, join the "FREEDOM FROM GUILT" workshop next Sunday.
See all the details below this post and DM me to ask if you have any questions.
Much ❤