02/10/2023
Don't Force The Process. Flow!
Have you ever experienced losing the joy of something you once loved because of self-imposed pressure?
Do you feel that your mind's expectations take away the fun from activities you used to enjoy?
Does your mind often create attachments to future results, killing the beauty of the journey in the process?
If you answered YES to any of the above, you are not alone. I experienced that a thousand times! And most people I've coached experienced it too!
But why does our mind behave this way?
I believe my mind imposes pressure on me because it wants the best for me. It doesn't want me to fail; it wants me to succeed.
I believe my mind creates expectations to anticipate the future, reduce uncertainty, and help me make decisions. It's for my own good.
I believe my mind creates attachments to future results because it's ambitious and seeks security and a sense of control.
My mind is there for me, and in its own way, it's trying to help me.
But it isn't always helpful!
Self-imposed pressure also leads to stress, anxiety, and burnout. It hinders my productivity and well-being.
While expectations can be helpful at times, they can also lead to disappointment when reality doesn't align with my mental constructs. Additionally, they create a sense of inadequacy and dissatisfaction in my relationships.
As for attachment to future results, it prevents me from enjoying the present and limits my adaptability.
In summary, if I let these unhelpful behaviours run free, they kill the beauty and joy of life.
Do you have the same experience?
Now, let's get practical.
I have some good news and some not-so-good news for you.
The good news is that we can change this. Hooray!
The less good news is that it's not easy. It takes time, patience and persistence.
But no one said life was easy, right? Plus, easy can be boring. Isn't it? So, how about stretching our comfort zone, putting in some purposeful effort, and growing in the process?
Here's how we do it.
First, we need to study the self-sabotaging behaviours of our minds and challenge their limiting beliefs.
This is what I've just done by exploring why my mind behaves in a certain way and the unhelpful consequences of that behaviour.
Second, we create new empowering beliefs and stories. Here are a few examples:
"I prioritize the joy of the journey over the pressure of achieving specific outcomes. Each moment is an opportunity to learn and grow, and I savour the experience without being overly fixated on the end result."
"I let go of the idea of perfection. It's okay to make mistakes and encounter challenges along the way. These are valuable lessons that contribute to my personal growth. I am willing to fail because it's a stepping stone to success."
"I cultivate a growth mindset by approaching each activity with an eagerness to learn and improve. I understand that true mastery comes from continuous effort and learning from both successes and setbacks."
"I am authentic and genuine in my pursuits. I don't pretend to be successful or perfect to meet external expectations. I recognize that being true to myself and my passions is key to finding lasting fulfilment."
"I focus on the present moment and fully immerse myself in the activity I love. By doing so, I let go of worries about future results and enjoy the richness of the here and now. This presence enhances my overall experience."
Then, Once we've laid the groundwork of discrediting limiting beliefs and creating empowering ones, we patiently and persistently practice awareness, emotional intelligence, mindset reprogramming, and action.
AWARENESS - We catch our mind when it engages in old unhelpful behaviours (we catch ourselves in a negative emotion).
EMOTIONAL MANAGEMENT - We stop, pause, and avoid reacting mindlessly to emotions. We observe what's happening with kindness, knowing it's an old, unhelpful thinking pattern we can let go of.
MINDSET REPROGRAMMING - We gently but firmly remind our minds of the new empowering perspective we've created and want to operate from.
ACTION - We make decisions and take purposeful actions from the new empowering mindset, no matter how small the step may be.
Simple. Not easy. And incredibly beneficial!
By going through this process patiently and persistently, our subconscious mind will inevitably absorb the new empowering mindset and start operating from it.
In return, you get to think better, feel better, and act better.
You get to feel more confident, at peace and connected.
Is it worth the hassle?
That's up to you and how much you value living a joyful life ;)
You can make up your mind later. For now, let me ask you...
Where in your life are you struggling to enjoy the journey because of attachment to results? Where does self-imposed pressure prevent you from having fun in the process?
What if letting go of this pressure allows your true self to blossom?
And what if that vibrant, free, and authentic version of you, rather than trying to force the process, naturally achieves results by gently flowing and playing with life?
If you believe it, you can make it happen.
Are you willing to give it a try?
Love,
Simone
