Amy's blog type page, Aylesbury (2025)

22/07/2023

Yesterday was a BIG day for Ida... and for me! Ida had her very last day at nursery!

Now I appreciate this is a milestone that many experience, in fact I’ve seen a number of Facebook and Instagram posts showing kids last day at nursery this week, but I cant help feeling that the significance of yesterday requires more than a quick comment, I cannot summarise the last 7 years in anything less than a blog post. For 7 years this nursery has been a constant in our ever changing, unpredictable and, at times, very traumatising 7 years. When everything was going wrong, nursery was there promising constant safety, constant care, constant support and routine. So here is our journey...

I clearly remember the days looking round nurseries before I returned to work from Emmett's maternity leave nearly 7 years ago. I had looked round three in Aylesbury and thought I had made my decision, when I suddenly decided I wanted to look round one more to compare. It only seemed sensible to look at one that was en route to work so I came across Aylesbury College Day Nursery. For reasons still unknown to me, I had already determined it wasn't going to be first choice but I headed there to look round with my mum anyway.
We were met by Nursery Manager Carol and shown around the building, into the four different rooms divided based manly on age; and within a few short minutes my "decision" changed- my previous first choice was demoted, I wanted Emmett coming here!
The Nursery had such a lovely feel about it, Carol was welcoming, fun and evidently keen to help working parents as much as possible. The staff were all friendly and I immediately decided it was the perfect fit.

7 years on and I still know that I made one of the best decisions of my life sending my two precious little ones to that Nursery! It is THE BEST! I have never had a single problem. My kids have always loved going (except perhaps Ida at the beginning 🤣) and the staff there are kind, caring, supportive, wonderful, phenomenal even and I literally have so much love for them all!
From the day Emmett started I knew my kids were safe in their hands and I cannot thank them enough.

Yesterday was Ida's last day there and I am feeling grief, I've lost that 7 year routine, my babies are grown up school children, but personally I've lost a source of comfort and friendship and my 7 year constant. Of course we can pop in but it's not the same. I will miss every single one of those wonderful ladies.
They were there when I was struggling with postnatal depression and listened to my woes.

They were there with a big hug, fighting our corner and rooting for Emmett when Emmett had cancer, they made sure they knew how best to help him. I remember Mandy asking to be educated on Emmett’s Hickman line when he returned to nursery even though they just needed to beware of it. And a group of them attended our fundraising tea and cake sale to further show us their support.
Carol and Dawn worked to make our lives financially less stressful during that time but ensuring Emmett stayed on their register even when they were under pressure to take him off.

They had me crying on their shoulders more times than I would have liked.

They called me EVERY TIME Emmett came into contact with a dangerous virus at Nursery when his immune system was still low- (including dreaded chicken pox that he came into contact with during his first 2 hours back after treatment 🙈)

They gave Ida her own steriliser and routine to ensure she was safe with her dairy, egg and soya allergies.
They (especially Julia) put up with HOURS of screaming from a 10 month old Ida when we were trying to settle her in.

Lisa had Ida as her own personal permanent shadow for at least a year. Cat made sure she transitioned happily to the next room when she had to be parted with Lisa, and soon Cat had a new shadow.

Dawn saw me as a hysterical mess the day before the national COVID lockdown was announced because when I picked Emmett and Ida up that day we knew we wouldn't be back in the following week and I couldn't cope with the idea of not knowing if Emmett would get to graduate! The milestone we were looking ahead to throughout the entire of his treatment was Nursery Graduation and starting school and I could foresee that opportunity being snatched away again. COVID DID prevent Emmett experiencing a graduation ceremony but Dawn and the ladies knew how important it was to me so for the few weeks Emmett made it back into Nursery after lockdowns and before starting school, Dawn got out the cap and gown especially for him, and for me. All these things meant so much to me.

This and much, much more, in addition to giving my kids the best start and setting them up so that they were/are very ready for school, has ensured that have never questioned if they were in the best place 2-3 days a week for the last 7 years. The Day Nursery Staff have guaranteed that both Emmett and Ida are ready for the next chapter in our lives. My grief is also wrapped with happiness, this point in our lives is bittersweet but I’m grateful to see my kids growing up and reaching the next part of their lives. Thank you Aylesbury College Day Nursery for playing such a huge and perfect part of our lives ❤

06/05/2023

In September last year I signed up to do a course. I signed up in secret, I didn't tell anyone at the time. Unfortunately we had so much illness in this house in the three months that followed, that I missed deadlines and got taken off the course. I had enjoyed the content and was disappointed but it wasn't just the course, I had had to take time off work with illness too and lots of things had been affected.
At the start of this year I spoke to the course organisers and explained the situation and that I was actually really valuing the course content. I had chosen to do it for a few reasons and I asked for another chance. They agreed to let me sign up again without penalty and I worked hard to complete the course this time. Today I received my certificate 🙂

Those of you who read my blogs will know that I have had my own personal battles with my mental health. Even though I myself have, in the past, had battles with self-harm and suicidal thoughts, when I am not in that dark hole, I struggle to understand why I would turn to self-harm; it felt illogical. So I wanted to do this course to understand this side of mental health more.

Additionally I now run a mental health support group with two friends of mine. Our group works with women experiencing pre and postnatal anxiety and depression. All three of us have been there. But just talking to the three of us about that time, it is clear that our experiences are similar but different.
Rate of su***de is higher in this population, and su***de is a leading cause of death in new mothers and accounts up to 20% of deaths in the first year post-birth. So I wanted to feel more confident that I might recognise these signs, if needed, earlier in women attending our group.

Another population area with a higher rate of su***de, that is often overlooked, is in our older adults. This is 'often attributed to the development of depression due to bereavement or loss of physical health and independence.' Su***de in older adults is another peak and these su***de attempts are often more planned and calculated. They tend to use more lethal methods and so the rate of attempts that lead to death are much greater.
Something I found undeniable during my career as a Physiotherapist was evident when I worked in the community team. I visited patients in their own homes, these are people who cannot attend Outpatient therapy for reasons such as difficulties leaving their house, this is predominantly due to mobility issues for frailty or illness reasons. The isolation and loneliness they experience is evident. They are often more motivated with their Physiotherapy because they want to be able to leave their own 4 walls or they have reached a depression, because of their situation. They not only were commited to their Physiotherapy but the value they had for my company was unmistakable. Some would not see anyone, except perhaps some agency carers, between Physiotherapy visits. These individuals gained as much, if not more, from my conversation as they did from Physiotherapy input. This loneliness and isolation, their reducing energy, independence and increasing health concerns can easily lead to mental health needs and this was always a part of my work that I wanted to be able to support their mental, as well as their physical, health.
I moved on to work in Neurology for eight years. The nature of the degenerative Neurological conditions or sudden life changes following a stroke, for example, that my patients were experiencing, were further causes of depression. I worked closely with a wonderful team of Psychologists during this role. I learned a great deal from this work together and it further established my desire to want to be able to provide a more holistic approach to my therapy. Just an extra point to note, the waiting list for our Psychology service was always the longest.
After I left the NHS and decided to go out on my own, it was natural that I should choose to specialise in seeing clients in their own homes, in particular with neurological conditions and/or older people, as well as pre-post surgical, and those who struggle to leave their homes for other reasons. I therefore felt it important that I further my knowledge to recognise mental health concerns in my clients too.

And then overall, mental health and su***de is a significant national concern, especially post COVID. This course covered children, young adults and adults. It educated on differences in these age groups, it explained subtle signs and ways to support and prevent self-harm and su***de but also educated on how to support su***de bereavement. I learnt a great deal from this course. One aspect of unit 4 was to look at su***de prevention campaigns. I looked into several, but chose to focus on a campaign run by the Samaritans that has since worked closely with the National Rail Network and British Transport Police. The campaign is called "Small Talk Saves Lives". Anyone can access the campaign materials and it aims to increase confidence in members of the public to trust their instincts if they are concerned about anyone and how to start a simple conversation that may save a life. I found this a worthwhile and valuable campaign especially in todays world. Su***de affects so many lives and is very much preventable.
I do hope that my personal experience and now the additional tools I have gained from this course, will allow me to support any family, friends, clients, colleagues, women I meet through our group or anyone I come across in life, who need it.

I'm proud of the work I completed for the course, my feedback was always very good. I had to search back in my memory to my uni days to remember how to do referencing but I enjoyed it, completed it, and still doing it "secretly". The Level 2 qualification is the equivalent of a GCSE and was a funded course. And most importantly of all, it has given me a bit more knowledge to help me understand my own personal challenges and to hopefully help others with theirs.

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