Narcissistic Personality Disorder - NPD Therapy Edgbaston Birmingham

23/04/2025

Understanding the traits of a narcissist woman

It is important to recognise the key difference between someone with NPD and the narcissistic qualities that can be displayed by anyone (including you!).

Signs of a narcissistic woman/puppet-master
For instance, the signs of a narcissistic woman may be that she uses manipulative tactics to get what she wants. However, this ‘female narcissist’ as she might be labelled, only occasionally does this and does not have any of the other traits defining NPD, so she would not be clinically diagnosed.

The DSM-5 lists nine key narcissistic traits
To be diagnosed at least five of these traits must be present in the individual:

Exaggerated feelings of superiority and self-importance
Regular fantasies about personal power, intelligence, success, or attractiveness
A firm belief in personal specialness
A strong need for attention, praise and admiration from other people
Entitled behaviour, such as a desire for special treatment
A habit of using manipulation tactics
Low empathy or disinterest in the emotional needs of others
A tendency to envy others or assume others envy them
Arrogance and scorn for others.


Giancarlo DiMaggio, psychiatrist and researcher in the treatment of narcissism, identifies seven domains, “maladaptive self–other schemas; poor self-reflection and intellectualising; disturbed agency; maladaptive coping; poor theory of mind and empathy”

This brings up the question…

Are Narcissists born or made?

What causes narcissistic personality disorder?
As with all personality disorders, there are a range of factors that contribute to the development of NPD. Our current understanding identifies inherited traits and early childhood experiences as key contributors to its development.

Now let’s dive into the differences between narcissist traits, female or male.

How female narcissists differ from males
Gender bias is a controversial and widely debated issue in the DSM-5, which currently reports that up to 75% of individuals with NPD are males. Due to discrepancies in socialisation and gendered expectations related to femininity and masculinity, the characteristics of someone with NPD can differ drastically between female and male.

Most gender stereotypes are defined within two categories. The first is reflective of ‘agentic characteristics’, defined as dominance, assertiveness, competitiveness and need for achievement. The second are ‘communal characteristics’, defined as tenderness, selflessness and nurturance. Agentic characteristics have been closely correlated with the narcissistic personality and the masculine stereotype, whereas communal characteristics are more likely to be typical of women and the feminine stereotype (Grijalva et al., 2015).

Males with NPD often score higher in entitlement, exploitativeness and a lack of empathy (Richman and Flaherty, 1990), being more likely to express overt “grandiose” narcissism. To the contrary, females with NPD use more indirect and discreet ways to fulfil their narcissistic goals, often displaying the covert “vulnerable” narcissism subtype (Morf & Rhodewalt, 2001).

When angered by a slight provocation, what is defined as ‘narcissistic rage’, the behaviours exhibited can also illuminate the distinct differences between genders. Whilst men tend to be aggressive and explosive (malignant), narcissist women will often withhold attention and withdraw affection, again characteristic of the “vulnerable” narcissist subtype. This subtype can be missed by the DSM-5 because of its current overemphasis on capturing grandiose themes (Green et al., 2023).

What is Narcissistic personality disorder (NPD)?
Narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) sits on a broad spectrum of severity, those with it often being unaware, or in denial, that they have it. It is prevalent, highly comorbid with other disorders and very variable in its characteristics. Whilst the underlying pathology remains the same, its presentation falls into three broadly accepted subtypes:

The grandiose “overt” narcissist,
The vulnerable “covert” narcissist
The “malignant” narcissist.


It is within these subtypes that we can identify gender differences.

If you are recovering or attempting to distance from a NPD relationship and need help ,call ;
Stuart - 07825 599340 or email for a free consultation call
stuart@stuartdowning.co.uk

18/04/2025

You can be a great father and still lose your family, because in today’s world, effort means nothing if you’re a man.

You wake up early.
You go to work.
You pay the rent.
You stay loyal.
You pray for the family.

Still - you lose them.

Not because you failed but because modern fatherhood is built like a trap.

You do everything right…
and still end up wrong.

She leaves. The kids follow. The house becomes a memory.

You keep paying bills.
She keeps changing the narrative.

And if you dare raise your voice?

You’re “toxic.”
You’re “unstable.”
You’re “the reason she left.”

You paid for the piper—
but she still dictates the tune.

You followed the rules. But that’s the problem.

Because if you follow the rules, you’re not a leader. If you’re loyal, you become a simp.

You were told to protect her. So you did!

You were told to provide. So you did!

You were told to stay faithful. So you did!

And now?
You’re divorced.
You’re depressed.
You’re disposable.

The court says, “You are not the father.”

But the damage is already done.
Your heart? Shattered.
Your name? Stained.
Your wallet? Still responsible.

They call it “in the best interest of the child.”
A child she won’t even let you see...

Meanwhile, she smiles in silence.

Because she already won.

The lie worked.
The system backed her.
And society cheered her on.

You?
You’re on your fourth therapy.
And nobody clapped you for surviving.

Let’s talk facts.

80% of divorces are initiated by women.
1 in 3 DNA tests come back negative.
Thousands of men are behind bars - not for crime - but for not being able to keep up with court-mandated payments…
for children that might not even be theirs.

Let that marinate.

You lose your family … and they still blame you.

“She probably warned him.”
“He chose beauty, not brains.”
“He didn’t discern well enough.”

Really?

So when men of God...
Pastor Chris Oyakhilome,
Benny Hinn,
Kenneth Copeland...
end up separated or divorced…
they didn’t hear God?

They didn’t fast enough?
They didn’t have spiritual eyes?

Or maybe…
just maybe…
they married women who were experts at hiding their true nature.

Until one day - they woke up, and switched.

No warning.
No remorse.
Just “I’ve changed.”

Modern women don’t leave you for cheating.

They leave because your timeline expired.
You don't tickle their fancy and fantasy again.
You couldn’t afford the soft life package again.
So they 'cut their losses' & shoot for the streets.

You were good. But you weren’t enough.

Not rich enough.
Not fun enough.
Not trendy enough.

And now the kids are gone.
The house is quiet.
Your heart is tired.

And all you hear is:

“Real men fight for their families.”

As if you didn’t already bleed trying.

Let me be clear.

You can be a great father and still lose all.

Not because you didn’t love enough.
But because love doesn’t matter anymore.

Not if you’re a man.

Let the keypad warriors flood the comments.
Let the women say “not all of us.”
Let the deniers come swinging.

But the real men know.

They’ve lived it.
They’ve bled it.
They’ve buried it.

Say nothing and move on.

22/03/2025

A narcissist doesn't love anyone, they manipulate. They don't seek healing, just safe places to return to when things go left. They use their past as a crutch, expecting pity while repeating the same toxic cycles. You could pour every ounce of love into them, and they'd still have a backup plan. They chase attention for power, never feeling satisfied. In the end, they'll drain you mentally, leaving you empty while they move on like nothing happened.

20/03/2025

A narcissist mindset, that didn't happen, and if it did, it wasn't that bad, and if it was, it's not a big deal, and if it is, it's not my fault and if it was, I didn't mean it, and if I did, you made me do it.

08/03/2025

14/02/2025

STRANGE BUT TRUTH 💔

You didn’t lose the love of your life; you broke free from the chains of a predator who drained your joy, strength, and identity.

A narcissist isn’t your soul mate—they’re a master manipulator hiding behind a carefully crafted mask. The person you see at the end of the relationship, the one who discarded you without empathy, is who they’ve been all along.

Their charm, their “magic,” their love-bombing—all of it was a performance. False promises and shallow words disguised their real agenda: to control, exploit, and feed off your emotional energy while breaking down your confidence.

What you endured wasn’t love—it was a calculated game of power. Gaslighting, criticism, and emotional manipulation weren’t acts of affection but weapons used to keep you doubting yourself. Their betrayals weren’t mistakes; they were deliberate moves to hold you captive in their cycle of abuse.

But here’s the powerful truth: You didn’t lose a family member—you escaped a nightmare.

Walking away from that toxic cycle took unimaginable strength. Breaking free from someone who pretends to love but thrives on control isn’t easy, but you did it. And now, you’re standing in the light of freedom, no longer bound to their lies.

Healing begins when you accept this: you weren’t loved, you were used. But that does not define your worth or your future.
You were created for real love, genuine connection, and a life filled with joy, authenticity, and peace.

You are worthy of being truly seen, deeply heard, and genuinely valued. Never settle for less than the love and respect you deserve. Real love isn’t a game or manipulation—it’s kind, patient, and true.

As you heal, remember this:

You’ve reclaimed your life, and the right people, the right love, and the right future are waiting for you.

10/02/2025

Insomnia and Sleep issues
Lying awake at night, staring at the ceiling, feeling wired but exhausted?
If that sounds familiar , there’s a good chance your cortisol levels are out of control.
And here’s the deal: high cortisol is more than just a bad night’s sleep—it’s a serious roadblock to your health, energy, and your ability to hit the flow state.
Cortisol is your body’s built-in alarm system.
It’s meant to help you handle stress, but when it sticks around too long—especially at night—it can wreak havoc on your sleep.
Studies show that elevated evening cortisol is one of the biggest culprits behind tossing and turning, disrupted sleep cycles, and that feeling of being “tired but wired”.
When your cortisol levels are too high in the evening, your body stays in a state of alertness, making it nearly impossible to relax and fall asleep.
And poor sleep doesn’t just affect your mood—it drags down your entire health, energy, and performance.
The Cost of High Cortisol:
1. Disrupted Sleep
High cortisol messes with your body’s natural circadian rhythm, making it harder to fall asleep and stay asleep. You wake up feeling drained, no matter how long you’ve been in bed.
2. Increased Stress and Anxiety
Cortisol is linked to heightened stress responses. If your cortisol stays high, your body is constantly in “fight-or-flight” mode, which leads to more stress, anxiety, and mental fog during the day.
3. Blocked Flow State
Cortisol doesn’t just affect your sleep—it blocks your ability to enter the flow state. The flow state is where you’re fully focused and performing at your best, but high cortisol keeps your brain stuck in overdrive, making it impossible to focus deeply or think creatively.
Now, imagine what happens when you cut evening cortisol by 25%.
You’re not just lowering your stress—you’re giving your body the green light to relax, sleep deeply, and wake up energized.
Lowering cortisol improves your sleep quality, reduces anxiety, and opens the door for you to finally access the flow state.
When cortisol comes down:
1. Deep, Restorative Sleep
Lower cortisol allows your body to enter its natural rest-and-recover mode, improving sleep quality and helping you wake up refreshed and ready to take on the day.
2. Reduced Anxiety, More Clarity
When your cortisol levels are balanced, you’ll notice less anxiety, better mental clarity, and an increased sense of calm. This sets you up for a more productive, focused day.
3. More Consistent Flow State
With cortisol in check, your mind and body can work together, making it easier to slip into the flow state—where creativity, focus, and high performance come effortlessly.
You don’t have to spend another night staring at the ceiling, trapped in a cycle of poor sleep and high stress.
Lowering your evening cortisol naturally is possible, and it’s the key to better sleep, more energy, and consistent access to the flow state.
Call Stuart - 07825 599340 to discuss your insomnia issue in more detail
Email - stuart .co.uk
https://hypnotherapy4freedom.co.uk/.../hypnotherapy-for...
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Stuart Downing is a trusted hypnotherapist helping clients overcome their issues across the UK and worldwide. Read his reviews here.

25/01/2025

10 Things the Narcissist Will Always Do When You Go No Contact with Them (5 Might Surprise You!)

02/10/2024

13/04/2024

32K likes, 1170 comments. “The fake discard is traumatizing af 🥴”