Moon Yard

27/10/2022

WHAT YOU MIGHT MEAN WHEN YOU SAY ‘SORRY’ /

If you’re an over-apologiser (like so many of us are) getting present to what you actually mean and what you’re actually feeling when you find yourself saying it might be helpful.

You might find that it’s coming from a fear of being disliked if you just say ‘no’

Maybe you want to be seen as a good person who priorities the needs of others…

Maybe you fear conflict & want to avoid it at all costs….

Perhaps you fear criticism & are using a ‘sorry’ to absolve yourself if any wrongdoing & as a means of avoiding truly owning your mistakes…

Maybe you’re using ‘sorry’ to demand the other person reassure you by saying ‘it’s ok’…

Discerning what we actually feel & mean & then expressing that accurately is skill and often requires unpacking learned conditioning.

Our workshops next month will help us use the body & felt sense to hone those skills & get better at it.

Link in bio x

25/10/2022

IRL WORKSHOPS NEXT MONTH /

Has the shift into autumn 🍂 left you feeling exhausted 🥱 and/ or low?

You might feel frustrated with your lack of energy & be pushing yourself to be the productive ‘normal’ you…

Or you might be mentally checking out, becoming distant & passive…

You could even resent that you aren’t feeling like the best version of you so hide away because this isn’t how you want to be perceived.

As women, we’ve been conditioned to focus on how we come across to others, and to conceal the less ‘likeable’ parts of us.

But this takes huge amounts of energy & robs the world of crucial aspects of who we really are - our own personal magic 🪄

The darker months are almost an invitation to turn towards the parts of ourselves we keep in the dark. The bits we feel we need to hide in order to ‘fit in’

When we offer those parts of ourselves some space & acknowledge them (like we will in this workshop) we can re-integrate them and embody our full energetic and emotional spectrum once more.

Full details are in bio.

🌚 🌚 🌚

25/10/2022

IRL WORKSHOPS NEXT MONTH /

Has the shift into autumn 🍂 left you feeling exhausted 🥱 and/ or low?

You might feel frustrated with your lack of energy & be pushing yourself to be the productive ‘normal’ you…

Or you might be mentally checking out, becoming distant & passive…

You could even resent that you aren’t feeling like the best version of you so hide away because this isn’t how you want to be perceived.

As women, we’ve been conditioned to focus on how we come across to others, and to conceal the less ‘likeable’ parts of us.

But this takes huge amounts of energy & robs the world of crucial aspects of who we really are - our own personal magic 🪄

The darker months are almost an invitation to turn towards the parts of ourselves we keep in the dark. The bits we feel we need to hide in order to ‘fit in’

When we offer those parts of ourselves some space & acknowledge them (like we will in this workshop) we can re-integrate them and embody our full energetic and emotional spectrum once more.

Full details are in bio.

🌚 🌚 🌚

17/10/2022

S.A.F.E. Self Compassion Practice / This is a practice to try at moments which aren’t really turbulent or charged so that you can hone the skill & then bring it into more challenging moments once it’s more familiar or second nature.

It’s not a one ☝️ time practice but something to repeat regularly so it starts to happen automatically.

What do you notice? Does working through these steps help the uncomfortable feelings of shame or guilt become more tolerable or less potent?

11/10/2022

11/10/2022

SHAME SPIRALS / Slide to learn what they are & how to know when you’re in one.

Shame is not an easy emotion to feel, stay present with or even think about…but it’s so powerful and can impact our thoughts and behaviour is lots of ways.

If any of the above slides resonate you might find our upcoming, in person workshop useful.

Embracing Our Shadow to Live in Our Wholeness - An Embodied Workshop for Women

Taking place next month in both Bristol & London - we’ll use embodied reflection to better integrate & accept all parts of ourselves.

Self acceptance, compassion & empathy are some of the strongest shame antidotes available.

Workshop details linked in our bio.

19/08/2022

WOMEN SUFFER MORE FROM STRESS //

There are many studies about this & of course multiple possible reasons why this has been found to be true (some studies are linked in our highlights if you’re curious)

We’ve highlighted nervous system centric, historic reasons in the slides above.

Our bodies have learned (over the last few thousand years of a patriarchal system) that to survive and stay safe we need to manage the needs of people around us and ensure their opinion of us remains positive.

Many of us are lucky enough to not have to navigate through such a system any more - but our nervous systems’ haven’t learned that yet. They are still coded to seek safety in relationships and by ensuring everyone else’s needs are met and managed.

This is the lens through which many women have to make decisions & take action and it makes every little thing in life more complex and exhausting…

We can’t think our way out of this…our nervous system requires retraining and that means working with the body as well as the mind…

Can you think of any example of when you were hampered in making a decision or taking action in your life because you were concerned about how it would affect someone else & now looking back you can see you were taking too much responsibility for their needs & subverting your own?

We’re chatting about this live in our FB community today at 12:30. Link in bio if you’d like to join

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16/07/2022

SELF ACCEPTANCE

How much do you really practice self-acceptance?

Do you embrace your flaws, shortcomings and places for growth, or do you constantly strive for more, belittle yourself when things go wrong and feel as if nothing you do is ever going to be worthy of the respect and love of other people? 

Often we believe that acceptance will come once ‘specific milestones have been realised.

Unfortunately those milestones are quickly replaced with others, and so a deeper sense of dissatisfaction grows.

This can also prevent us from being present as we look back at a long list of ‘failures’ or ‘mistakes’ and berate ourselves for making the wrong turns, rather than using those experiences as learning curves, and ways of forming a deeper understanding of all parts of who we are. 

Self- acceptance can be slippery, and when we start to practice it, it can be easy to slip into self-criticism or bargaining… IF this THEN this. True self-acceptance takes away the IFs BUTs and SHOULDs and finds peace with what actually is.

We’re discussing how to cultivate self acceptance in a LIVE chat in our community on Monday at midday.

Join our community ‘A Safe Space for Women who feel Stressed, Stuck & Less-than’ via the link in our bio & tune in on Monday.

30/06/2022

Sometimes when we feel disconnected from those around us, it can feel hopeless, pointless or even exhausting to try and help our loved ones to understand us better. The tendency can be to mentally sign out and ignore harmful communication for the sake of keeping the peace. And sometimes this is necessary to preserve energy or as an act of kindness....

However if it becomes a default habit, we are constantly missing opportunities for genuine connection and being better understood.

Some of us might choose to ignore, simply accept or retaliate in a passive aggressive way to some of these unhelpful comments. But how do these actually make you feel? Do they trigger you? Are they helpful or hurtful? Do they make you feel seen and understood, or overlooked and unhelpfully categorised. If you can connect to the feeling underneath this is the first step.

Can these alternative responses help to connect to the person making unhelpful assumptions, whilst also providing a clear direction about how you wish future communications to go?

16/06/2022

It is not always easy to admit to ourselves that in some ways the highs and lows of the stress response have become something that we feel we need in order to function properly. It is well understood that stressful life situations and events can lead to addictive patterns and behaviours, but what if the addiction is actually to stress itself?

We can become psychologically, physically and emotionally dependent on the highs and lows of stress hormones and chemicals.

Do any of these sound like you?

06/06/2022

HOW MANY OF THESE FEEL FAMILIAR?

A lot of our clients who are struggling with stress, burnout and feeling stuck also identify as perfectionists and notice they have a loud, critical inner dialogue.

If you're a perfectionist or find yourself engaging in negative self talk, DM us the words 'GOOD ENOUGH' for a practice called: Show Your Inner Critic the way of Good Enough.

18/02/2022

The Dance of Healthy Boundary Setting:

Oftentimes when we start to learn about our boundaries and how to set them appropriately the tendency maybe to move from one end of spectrum to the other. For example - if you're someone who hasn't historically set many boundaries at all, your first attempt at regaining your own space might feel quite harsh, rigid, abrupt or even punitive to others. This is all part of the learning process.

Conversely, if you're someone who's had quite strong boundaries which have led you to feel disconnected from others, your first attempt at being more open or less shut down may feel like a vulnerability purge and leave you wanting to draw back to the protective shell which feels more familiar to you.

This is quite normal when we've lived for a long time in one extreme end of the boundary spectrum. The skill is to lean into the middle by taking small tentative steps in either direction.

Start by dipping your toe in the water and notice how it feels to do something slightly different. Rome wasn't built in a day and neither will your healthy boundaries be established overnight by attempting to do everything completely opposite to how you've always done them.

It can take a lot of time, patience & resilience to withstand the emotional rollercoaster that is inevitable when you're moving out of an extreme end of the spectrum of boundary setting. Just remember the more experiences you have of operating from a space that honours your needs as well as the needs of others, the easier it gets to apply fluid boundaries appropriate to the situation.