24/07/2025
Last day of term yesterday and when I walked into the room. The head of the course and another teacher was there but not our own.
My sons teacher died last week, so walking into this situation I internally freaked out waiting to hear if there had been an accident and a wave a grief hit me at the same time as I tried to contain my emotions for ###X, who was a wonderful human.
Isn't it lucky I'm doing Counselling.
My ability to mask is still strong so it came to the check in where we were all getting raw and real where the tears suddenly flowed. I turned away to the wall and let the tears flow until it was my turn, knowing it was ok to say my heart is currently a little broken.
We have a nice group - it is a safe space.
I left the lesson for composure and had a chat with the lead just about where my head was at and where the grief was hitting. Before heading back into class.
Grief is so strange. Hitting over and over. Its sometimes makes no sense why it hits or takes you out. It took me a minute to work out my trigger and why I was suddenly pulled into the ocean of it fully.
But these feelings will be of use as I come through and get to help others.
And so I have new teacher, the old one decided we weren't the class for him and that's okay.
I am quite excited to be taught by her in September as there's a lot of alignment in who she serves and her why to do the job with my own. So onwards and upwards.
