29/06/2023
Separating the cremation from the celebration.......
The funeral standard, most usually delivered by Andrea Bocelli and Sarah Brightman, feels so fitting at the crematorium that we can forgive the otherwise quite incomprehensible lyrics because of the single line “it’s time to say goodbye”. And by the time you are at the crematorium it is, indeed, time to say goodbye; or is it?
Man reading eulogy at a crematorium with a friend standing next to him with his arm around him
Let’s think about those two things – the time and the saying goodbye. The thing is that times are changing, and although for many people the well trodden path of death, funeral director, crematorium still brings enough meaning and comfort to adequately mark the end of a life in a social sense, for an increasing number of others it does not.
Take the distinct shift towards direct, or non attended cremations for example. The option to have a cremation without any ceremony has always been there, but the number of families choosing this option has taken a marked upturn in recent times.
Why could that be? Are we becoming hard hearted about after death rituals or is the relentless upward march in cost of an average funeral forcing more people to go this way as a less than ideal, but affordable option?
The cost challenge is real and very concerning with an average uk funeral now coming in at £3,953 (£3000 with us ) it is simply beyond many families in these tough economic times to come up with that kind of money. That is heartbreaking. However here at Free Plan we are encouraging and supporting a new, positive, meaningful and more cost effective funeral, and it comes down to timing.
Most crematorium funerals fulfil two purposes; one, to get everyone together to mark the death of someone and two, to cremate the remains. If you can separate the cremation from the act of remembrance then you have so much more freedom. If there is no ceremony with the cremation you don’t need to worry about whether Aunty Joan can get a bus home after the funeral tea if the ceremony is at 2pm, or stress about meeting and speaking to people you might not know very well. By booking a direct cremation with Free Plan you can tick the cremation part off your list and really consider remembrance, and now things get interesting!
I say that because if you actually sit down and think about how you would want your own life to be remembered when it is over, it may well not be in a building that people only go to when they are sad or broken hearted. It may be in a place that was actually meaningful to you like your garden or your local pub! And what does that remembrance look like? Some tears, yes, people will be sad, but there could also be smiles, storytelling, photographs, music, food and laugh, big belly laughs, as those whose lives you touched remember who you were and what you meant to them.
Equally, it could be a family meal on your birthday or a group of friends raising a glass of your favourite wine as they speak about how much they enjoyed your get togethers. A day at the races or a long hike with a flask of tea and sandwiches at the end. That is the beautiful thing. If you separate the act of cremation from the act of remembrance you are freed, and costs will be significantly less too. A direct cremation with Free Plan costs just £995 which, if you spent £1,000 on a big party for family and friends, would still leave you with change of almost £2,000!
So, if we separate the cremation from the remembrance, if we change the timing of the two parts, that gives us a huge choice as to how we say goodbye and that is a much better recipe for joy, meaning and remembrance for many.
Cost Effective Funerals with Free Plan
Here at Free Plan we help families to focus on celebrating the life of someone they love, in a way that feels right to them.
