AM child Sleep

20/01/2026

I am often contacted by parents whose children fall asleep easily with parent beside them, and then the parents find themselves in a situation where theirchild wakes a couple of hours later, distressed and wanting a parent beside them for the rest of the night.

This can be exhausting and stressful for the family.

We all wake every 60-90 minutes to check that things are the same as when we fell asleep. In these children’s worlds, there had been a huge change which unsettled them.

Imagine for a second you go to sleep in your bed in your room, in your home. It’s comfortable and safe enough for you to do so. However, imagine waking overnight and finding yourself in your bed, but that bed had moved to the local night street. This change would not allow you to fall back to sleep easily due to the change in environment.

It is so important for your child to settle to sleep in their own surroundings and that there should be no changes once they are asleep…even something as a teddy falling on the floor or a change in lighting may cause overnight upset.

This applies to children of all ages. Younger children will cry out for you, where older children are likely to come and find you, refusing to go back to bed.

A calm and consistent approach to bedtime will reassure your child that when they wake they do not necessarily need you until the morning.

If you struggle with your child’s sleep, and would like support. Feel free to contact me for a free 20 minute consultation.

11/01/2026

Ok, admit it...who has finally flopped onto the sofa with a cuppa or a glass of wine in your hand?

Dreading the creak of the floorboards-knowing your overly tired child doesn’t think it is time for sleep yet?

Or, are you sitting on the floor in your child’s room, flicking through your phone in a bid to pass the time, before you think it is time to leave ninja style, in the hope that they don’t wake?

Do you finally go to bed knowing that tomorrow morning, you will experience a millisecond of despair, as your gorgeous child excitedly greets you ready for the day ahead?

Do you wonder how long it will be before there is a sense of grumpiness in the air?

Completely exhausted but not wanting to go to bed yet...you want some you time. However you are too tired to enjoy the evenings.

Recent research has noted that parents experience sleep deprivation for up to 6 years. For some parents this may last well beyond this.

A child’s sleep problem is a family sleep problem. Children mirror their parents behaviour and perhaps it’s time for you to prioritise your sleep as well.

I am an experienced paediatric nurse who works intensively with families to support their child in addressing their child’s sleep problem. There are many reasons behind children’s sleep problems, and my knowledge and skills will help you address your child’s sleep problem.

Please feel free to contact me for a free 20 minute consultation.

17/11/2025

As many families with a lived experience of ADHD are aware, sleep can be really difficult to manage.

There is a known link between ADHD and sleep problems, with difficulties in falling asleep or staying asleep being most noted. I’m sure that many avenues have been tried to support your child with their sleep, seeking advice, support and even turning to medication just for a few hours rest.

An exciting nationwide research project has been developed for families of children with ADHD who struggle to fall asleep. Interested?

https://www.facebook.com/share/p/1Ct6hoY5VG/?mibextid=wwXIfr

UHS is leading a groundbreaking trial of a digital support tool designed to help children with ADHD improve their sleep.

Developed by experts and parents, Sleep Buddy offers practical advice, sleep plans and guidance tailored to the unique challenges faced by children with ADHD.

📊 Almost two thirds of children with ADHD experience sleep problems. These include finding it hard to get to sleep at bedtime, waking in the night or waking up early in the morning.

🏥 Researchers UHS, the University of Southampton and Southampton Clinical Trials Unit have been working with parents and carers of children with ADHD to develop Sleep Buddy. Families are now being invited to help researchers test to how well Sleep Buddy works in a large trial.

🔗 Find out more: https://www.uhs.nhs.uk/whats-new/press-releases/sleep-buddy-trial-aims-to-help-children-with-adhd-and-their-families

25/10/2025

The benefits of light for a good night...

How are you today? I can’t believe the clocks are going back tonight!

Do you have anyone in your home who really finds getting up hard? It may be that they “aren’t a morning person” or they struggle to fall asleep at night.

If your little person is falling asleep late, as parents, the temptation is to allow them to sleep in the following day.

However, our bodies are designed to be routine driven. We tend wake, eat, drink, use the toilet and go to bed around the same time each day.

Every cell in our body has an internal body clock, which is known as a circadian rhythm. This is “set” at 24 1/2 hours which allow us to have 30 minutes flexibility each day with routines before any effects are seen.

As humans we try to push our body clocks by having late nights, international travel through time zones and not exposing ourselves to enough light through the day.

Whilst altering it slightly may only have a short term impact - such as flying a long distance and experiencing jet lag, if you continue to push it, it can cause issues both physically and emotionally.

If your child tells you they aren’t tired, or will find it difficult to drift off at bedtime. It is likely that they will be afforded a slightly later night - particularly at weekends or during holidays.

Following a later night, you may be allowing your child to sleep in, they will be falling asleep later the following night. This is known as a phase shift, which may be problematic when we return to nursery, school or college.

So, what can you do?

: Late afternoon day light will help. Wrap up warm and play outside. Take this opportunity for exercise and have fun!

: Same bedtime and wake up time each day.

: use cream, yellow or red lights in the house, Particularly in the bedrooms. Any white, blue or green hues in lights will convince the brain that it is still daylight.

: Use bright light therapy in the mornings. You may have heard of sad lamps. They replicate strong sunshine to wake you up and increases your serotonin levels, your “happy hormones”.

Light therapy is the only “sleep aid” I would advocate. Lamps that you use have to be 10,000 lux to be effective and are only required to be used for 20-30 minutes each morning.
You do not have to look at it, just have it close to you whilst you go about your morning routine. It doesn’t just benefit the person who struggles with mornings, it can help the whole family!

Remember, the days are short now, but getting that daylight will help with sleep.

Feel free to contact me for a free 20 minute consultation if you would like support.

15/09/2025

Bedtime anxiety is very common in children and young people.

It can start very young with a separation issue, lead onto a fear of “monsters under the bed”, and may progress to generalised anxiety both day and night.

Your child may display these symptoms as repeatedly getting up for the toilet, becoming angry at bedtime or having a “poorly tummy”.

For older children, they may begin to worry about not getting enough sleep and the impact that will have the following day.

Unfortunately, both anxiety and sleep problems can go hand in hand, with one feeding the other. Neither is your child’s fault.

Your child needs to feel reassured throughout the day that anxiety is a normal “fight or flight response”. The sooner they become comfortable with this concept, the more receptive they will be to any sleep support you can offer them.

- An opportunity to talk about their anxieties during the day, not at bedtime. Please don’t dismiss them as being “silly” - they are real to your child.
- A calm and consistent bedtime routine.
- Allow them to spend time doing a relaxing activity in the hour before bed: colouring, diaries, reading, relaxation or mindfulness.
- Educate your child about sleep.

If you would like support with regards to your child’s sleep concerns, please do not hesitate to contact me for a free 20 minute telephone consultation.

If you are concerned about the level of anxiety your child is displaying, please speak to your GP, school nurse, or health visitor for further advice.

09/06/2025

Tired children often have very subtle signs indicating that they are sleepy. It is very rare for a child to say “I’m tired”, and if asked outright, they will often deny it (whilst yawning!).

By noticing your child’s sleep cues, you can find the “sweet spot” for bedtime.

Signs to look out for include:

: staring into the distance
: eye rubbing
: clinginess
: disinterest in toys or food
: fussiness
: demanding attention
: crying inconsolably and often without obvious reason
: behaviour change
: refusing things that would normally comfort them.

For older children, it is important to be aware that an increase in activity can be a sign of tiredness. Parents describe their child “going nuts”, “getting the zoomies” and “being too active” at bedtime. This can lead to parents feeling that, perhaps, their child is displaying signs of potential ADHD.

The signs of chronic sleep deprivation and ADHD are so closely linked, you may find that by improving sleep, and recognising this as a sleep cue, may improve daytime symptoms.

Once you understand your child’s sleep cues, acting to bring bedtime earlier by 15 mins or nap earlier by the same amount can reduce the chance of them becoming so tired that they fight it and try to keep themselves awake - often through screaming or activity.

This is likely to reduce bedtime stress for both you and your child.

If you would like any support with regards to your child’s sleep. Please do not hesitate to contact me for a 20 minute discovery call.

05/06/2025

I read an interesting article this morning whilst waiting for my teen to get ready for school.

Recent research conducted for parenting found that parents can lose approximately 15 days a year doing a drawn out bedtime routine!

This leads to losing your evening and can cause relationship conflict, further exhaustion and poor parental sleep.

I see this daily, and can see how parents can find themselves in these situations. Years of working with family sleep problems has shown the lengths parents will go to in order to get their child to sleep: parents climbing into a cot, the same 8 story books every night, going in every half hour to restart a favourite piece of music, rearranging teddies…the list is endless.

Whether or not you need to stay with your child’s until they are asleep, these routines are not sustainable for you. Staying in their room until they are asleep can lead to a sleep onset association, and will mean that you are regularly returning to them throughout the night.

The bedtime routine should be an enjoyable time with a calm end point, ideally within 30 minutes of the whole routine starting…not as they get into bed. You don’t want to be leaving your child frustrated and then not be able to enjoy a bit of “you time” before you go to bed.

It is thought that whilst every moment of life is precious, there are 9 critical minutes of the day that will support you and your child:
The first 3 minutes of the day, the first 3 minutes of the reunion (after nap, nursery or school) and the last 3 minutes of the day.
Missing out on any of these through distraction or frustration can lead to discontent within the family.

What are your bedtime routines?

If you would like help with this, or any other child sleep concern, please feel free to reach out to me for a discovery call.

27/05/2025

Sleep terrors and sleepwalking

27/05/2025

Are you living in a home with a little person who suffers with sleep terrors or sleepwalking?

Can you almost set your watch, knowing what time the screaming starts, or the padding of little feet is heard?

Both sleep terrors and sleepwalking are also referred to as parasomnias (behaviours occurring during sleep that cause disruption)

Some children can experience a repeat of the sleep terror or sleepwalking within an hour of the first episode.

They can, but not always, be a sign of stress, over tiredness, or illness. They can be common in children between the age of 4 and 8 years, but can also occur earlier or later in childhood.

It is really important to understand that sleep terrors are very different from nightmares.

A sleep terror will always happen in the early part of the night, as your child begins to come out of deep sleep (within 1-4 hours after initial sleep onset)

Your child will not be able to be consoled during a sleep terror, which can be distressing for you as a parent. However, please rest assured, your child will not remember it.

Although your child may be talking, it will not be meaningful conversation. They may appear very distressed and sweaty, . They may look as though they are awake, but they are still in sleep.

Sleep terrors tend not to last too long in duration, and the child will easily settle back to sleep.

This is different from a nightmare, which will occur later in the night, during REM (dream) sleep. You child will be consoled by you, and are likely to remember the nightmare.

Sleepwalking also occurs in the first few hours of sleep. Again, they are not awake. When sleepwalking, it is possible to do complex tasks such as open doors and make food. Your child will only be aware of sleep walking if they wake whilst doing it. This can be confusing for them to wake somewhere they didn’t expect to. Simply guide your child back to bed in a calm manner.

Most children will grow out of the parasomnia by 8 years old, but you can help them to stop.
If you cannot be definite about timings, keep a diary for a week to confirm when the sleep terrors or sleepwalking start.
15 minutes before the time the parasomnia starts, go in and gently stir the child. Not enough to wake them, just enough for them to stir slightly.
Don’t try to wake them, it may cause further agitation or distress as they wake out of deep sleep.

For sleepwalkers, it is vital that you are aware of safety...ensuring doors and windows are locked and that the key is not easy to reach.
Maintain the stirring each night. Don’t miss a night. Over time, the symptoms of night terrors or sleepwalking will lessen and eventually stop.
Continue the stirring for a further few weeks after they have stopped to make sure that they don’t return.

For sleepwalkers, it is vital that you are aware of safety...ensuring doors and windows are locked and that the key is not easy to reach.
Try not to discuss the incidents with your child, it may cause them to be anxious about sleep and lead to reluctance to go to bed.

If you are struggling with any aspect of your child’s sleep, please do not hesitate to contact me for a free 20 minute consultation.

08/05/2025

Did you know that world maternal mental health day is held on 7th May?

However, we should be aware of this every single day of the year. Being a new mum can be an overwhelming experience for even the most supported and experienced parents.

It is estimated that 1 in 5 new mums experience perinatal mood and anxiety disorder, and 1 in 10 dads experience low mood. You are not alone.

After all the anticipation of “the new arrival” picturing what motherhood should look like, probably influenced by social media posts showing happy parents and contented babies, you may not be feeling those societal aspirations. Please rest assured, “perfect posts” don’t show the reality of the rest of the day!

It doesn’t help when people ask unhelpful questions such as “Are they healthy?”, “are they good?” “Do they sleep?” or “Do they feed well?” How do you think they would respond if you said “no?”

When were you last asked “how are you?”

Even if they did ask, would you feel confident to say “this is tough, I need to have a shower, coffee or just a hug?”

Your baby of course needs you to be responsive to their needs both day and night, but they also want you to be ok. It is more than ok to ask for help.

There is a known bidirectional relationship between sleep and mental health, with poor sleep increasing the risk of low mood and anxiety, and symptoms of these changing your sleep.

It doesn’t help that all new parents are sleep deprived. Fortunately, as the human race, we are biologically designed to survive this period. Your baby doesn’t have a routine and as such cannot understand the sleep cues needed to sleep through the night, on top of this, they need to satisfy their little tummies and reassurance that they are safe and loved.

In the first few months, start a bedtime routine for your little person, and yourself. If you want more support, look for sleep advice from The Lullaby Trust or www.babysleep.com

You are not failing as a parent if you experience these feelings. You are not alone. You are strong. You are amazing.

Look after yourself, ask for and accept help.

29/04/2025

I recently spoke to a parent of a toddler who was transferred to her own bed once she was asleep. Falling asleep on their parents bed was a positive family experience after cuddles, stories and milk.

However, within a couple of hours the child woke and became highly distressed. They could not calm down until they had returned to the area in which they fell asleep in and a parent was present for the remainder of the night.

Understandably the family were exhausted and confused by their child’s overnight distress.

We all wake every 60-90 minutes to check that things are the same as when we fell asleep. In this toddlers world there had been a huge change which unsettled them.

Imagine for a second you go to sleep in your bed in your room, in your home. It’s comfortable and safe enough for you to do so. However, imagine waking overnight and finding yourself in your bed, but that bed had moved to the local night street. This change would not allow you to fall back to sleep easily due to the change in environment.

It is so important for your child to settle to sleep in their own surroundings and that there should be no changes once they are asleep…even something as a teddy falling on the floor or a change in lighting may cause overnight upset.

This applies to children of all ages. Younger children will cry out for you, where older children are likely to come and find you, refusing to go back to bed.

A calm and consistent approach to bedtime will reassure your child that when they wake they do not necessarily need you until the morning.

If you struggle with your child’s sleep, and would like support. Feel free to contact me for a free 20 minute consultation.