16/06/2018
Well said; thank you Haanagh Smith.
This quote made by Professor Stephen Hawking is hugely poignant. He may have had needs where he required huge amounts of assistance physically, yet his mind was his own to explore, think and was as he said, free.
It struck a chord with me as often people have not realised or understood that this applies to many wheelchair users, like Reuben.
Whether that be talking over his head to his Carer or me instead of to him.
Whether that be finishing his sentences for him.
Whether that be making choices on his behalf instead of asking him.
Whether that be making assumptions he doesn’t have thoughts or opinions.
Whether that be making assumptions about his cognition.
Whether that be assuming someone who is a wheelchair user, like Reubs, cannot think for themselves.
Just because someone is non-verbal does not mean that they don’t have thoughts or choices. They may have difficulties in communication or alternative ways of doing so, but don’t assume they can’t think or have thoughts.
Don’t make assumptions. Don’t judge someone’s abilities just because you see the chair first. Just because their body may mean they need extra help, it does not always mean they require assistance with their mind, their thoughts, opinions or beliefs.
In Reuben’s case, he cannot walk or look after himself. He can’t feed himself or be independent. But never ever assume this ‘disability’ therefore applies to his mind as well.
He is funny. He dreams. He has opinions. He has thoughts. He has feelings. He learns. He remembers. He is clever and intelligent. He has a memory far better than mine.
In his mind he can dance with his emotions and run with his thoughts and feelings. In his mind he has no restrictions. In his mind ‘he is free’ and can learn and think and make decisions without anyone helping him.
He will remember if you gave him the chance to speak rather than talk over him.
He will remember anyone if they are kind to him. If you aren’t, he’ll never ever let you forget it.
This is why there needs to be accessibility and services for people with disabilities. For example, this is why Changing Places toilets are such important facilities. This is why the world needs to improve on their care for disabled individuals. Without those facilities, diversity, dignity and privacy are affected and disabled people feel that loss of dignity and all the associated emotions just like the able bodied people in our communities. Just because some disabled people may use a chair (and don’t forget many people have disabilities where a chair is not required) does not make them less. It does not mean they should accept less. It does not mean they are secondary to society and it’s shameful if one was to possess that opinion.
They are never, ever less.
Just because someone uses a chair does not mean they don’t feel emotions and it should never, ever be presumed that this is the case.
So don’t assume. Don’t judge. Don’t see the chair as a symbol of the person. It’s just a part of someone’s life.
Talk to them.
You may learn a thing or two.
