09/07/2025
There are a number of diagnostic guides and manuals which attempt to categorise experiences into formal definitions of trauma or traumatic stress. However the truth is, what is experienced as traumatic will vary enormously from one person to another. That doesn’t mean some people are weaker or less resilient, it simply means we’re different beings, with different backgrounds, living in different systems. Trauma is subjective, individual and personal. In my opinion, it is also universal.
The best definition I have come across in my reading is that “trauma” occurs when a person experiences either:
Too much (stress) to soon
OR
Too much (stress) for too long OR
Not enough (needs being met) for too long
What we do know is that distressing symptoms associated with trauma are more likely to occur when:
🔷 adversities occur at a younger developmental stage
🔷 there was an absence of someone to support you and help to make sense of what happened
🔷 the danger was long lasting, repeating or very severe
🔷 you were hurt, on purpose, by someone who was supposed to look after you.
🔷 the threat was unpredictable or you were unable to escape
🔷 what happened, happened in the context of other ongoing threats
We also know for sure that trauma recovery is entirely possible. A dominant idea in the field suggests that there are three phases to recovery, which can be worked through at many paces, using a wide range of therapeutic models and approaches.
These stages are:
1. Safety and stabilisation - finding ways to feel safe and manage overwhelm in the present.
2. Remembering and mourning - processing what happened and grieving what was lost.
3. Reconnection and integration - creating a new sense of self and future.
