Lewis Etoria Psychotherapy and Counselling

04/03/2026

🫵 Becoming Ourselves..... again and again

If life were a book, becoming yourself would be the story that threads through every chapter. Each season would turn a new page, revealing a layer you didn’t know you were ready to meet. Some chapters would be soft and sun‑lit, others heavy with underlined sentences and footnotes full of questions. Yet, all of them would be necessary to the plot.

Perhaps you would meet earlier versions of yourself the way you meet characters who shaped the beginning of the story. As the narrative deepened, you’d notice how each chapter brings you closer to a voice that feels more your own, more honest, more rooted.

Therapy offers a time and place dedicated to reflecting on your lifelong manuscript of becoming. Within that space maybe some it can be revised, expanded, and deepened - what do you think?



Thanks

18/02/2026

We often label behaviour as good or bad — but behaviour is actually communication.

A calm child has the skills (in that moment).
A dysregulated child is still learning them.

Your role isn’t to judge the behaviour —
it’s to guide the skill.
✨ Regulation
✨ Problem-solving
✨ Repair

That’s how change happens.

👉 Instead of asking: “Why are they behaving like this?”

Try: “What skill do they need right now?”

💛 You’re not raising a “good” child.
You’re raising a capable one.

Follow for realistic, skill-based parenting support
🔗 www.thetherapistparent.com

27/01/2026

Here’s some pictures of my therapy space. The room is quiet, private and calm but that doesn’t mean you have to be. You are welcome to arrive however you are and however you need to be.

22/01/2026

For my fellow mixed race therapists and clients and anyone out there working through what it means to have mixed heritage in a world that sees only black and white, a reminder that other people don't get to define your experience of race, identity and racial trauma.

30/11/2025

Four of my favourite books on relational psychotherapy. All from different viewpoints but all focused on the importance of the relationship between therapist and client.

23/11/2025

I'm having a sort out of books and trying to make space for things and musing that this reflects my experience of life at the moment.

Sometimes I just have to take everything off the shelf, take a step back and have a look at where everything fits.

The shelf is still going to be full, but it won't be overflowing!

18/11/2025

This quote from Donald Winnicott cuts through to a duality of the human condition – that we need both a private self and connection with others. We may at times feel a tension between the need to protect our autonomy and our need to be close to other people.

In psychotherapy you can explore what autonomy and connection mean to you, how they show up in your relationships with others and how you can work toward a firmer sense of self.

Psychotherapy can support you to feel more sure-footed in knowing when it is right for you to draw back from connection and when it is right for you to lean in. The push-pull you may sometimes feel in relation to other people is one of the things I seek to explore with you as a relational-developmental psychotherapist.

01/11/2025

People come to therapy for all kinds of reasons. Usually, because something in their life is not quite right. They may have experienced something painful that feels unbearable. They may be going through a difficult experience right now. Or they may not know what is wrong, but something feels not right or stuck.

It's almost impossible to explain exactly what will happen in your therapy because each person is unique. That said, my goals for your therapy will always be:
➡That you feel more comfortable with yourself
➡That you are able to heal and grow from painful experiences
➡That you are empowered to make decisions about how you live your life.

23/09/2025

Most accredited courses for psychotherapists require trainees to undertake their own personal therapy. This varies by course and accrediting body.

The requirements of my accrediting body (the UKCP) are for at least 40 hours of personal therapy through each of my four years of training.

Why is this?

Undertaking therapy while training and practising supports me to:
- Understand my own process and how this plays out in relationship with others
- Develop self-awareness
- Become aware of how I impact others, and how they impact me
- Experience a long-term therapeutic journey.

In relational psychotherapy your therapist's self-awareness is vital. As humans we all bring parts of our history into our here-and-now relationships. This happens out of our awareness. In your therapy I will be supporting you to become more aware of how your history impacts you now, particularly in how you relate to others. The more awareness I have of my own patterns, the better I am able to support you in understanding yours.

13/09/2025