Emotion Enhancement

12/02/2023

2. Don't expect a rebound partner to speed the healing.

01/06/2022

https://www.emotionenhancement.com/therapy

Emotion Enhancement Therapy is now open for new face-to-face clients in a convenient location next to Liverpool Street Station.

Some of the issues I can help with include relationship problems, insecure attachment, breakups, enmeshment & abandonment trauma, low self-esteem, anxiety and more. Please visit the new Therapy page for further information.

Emotion Enhancement therapy provides counselling services in London specialising in relationships, breakups and emotional development.

21/04/2022

Research shows couples who split within six years of getting married tend to have six similar habits.

19/01/2022

Projection, "pathological certainty," and lack of self-awareness.

11/11/2021

Gottman’s five-to-one ratio

"John Gottman from the Gottman Institute has done extensive research regarding relationships and what makes them happy.

One of the more interesting findings is about the magic ratio. After examining couples and how they dealt with conflict, it seemed that happy couples for who love lasts show five positive interactions for each negative one.

[...]So, let’s say there is a conflict between a couple where one criticizes the other. Then, to resolve this conflict they can try positive interactions, which for example are showing empathy, apologizing, being affectionate, showing appreciation or interest."

Words and graphic by on Instagram.

11/06/2021

The emotional equivalent of leaving someone at the altar.

06/05/2021

by Marissa Pomerance There are 4 things that some couples do regularly that are so unhealthy, they’ve been dubbed “The 4 Horsemen,” as in, the 4 horsemen of the apocalypse, according to The Gottman Institute.   And how does this one institute get to make such bold assertions, you ask

07/04/2021

Accept that they won't change and take responsibility for your own choices.

11/02/2021

Enmeshed families are at the extreme end of closeness, with no healthy boundaries between family members and the parents' unmet emotional needs taking priority..

Enmeshed families are are inflexibly close, overinvolved in each other's lives, with hardly any boundaries between family members, lack of a

20/01/2021

Bids for attention, and the health of relationships.

16/12/2020

It’s estimated that 50% of people have an insecure attachment style, and this topic by far drives most traffic to Emotion Enhancement, and is the reason many of my clients seek therapy. Attachment styles are first established by the relationship we have with our parents in childhood, and this becomes the basis on which we form and maintain relationships as an adult. With such a high percentage of insecure attachment, it’s perhaps surprising how many people are unaware of what their predominant attachment style is. Whilst some people sit strongly within just one attachment style, others will use strategies from more than one of the styles. This is why it’s useful to check your predominant & secondary attachment styles using a more detailed assessment.

The Diane Poole Heller assessment (www.dianepooleheller.com) shows the percentage split between attachment styles. For example, my primary style was secure with 52% with secondary attachment styles of fearful-avoidant & anxious, both being around 20%. The Farley assessment (www.web-research-design.net) also breaks down by relationship type, so you can see the difference between your styles with family, friends and intimate partners, and can record how this changes over time.

If you do have a insecure attachment style, being aware of your triggers and negative attachment strategies is the first step in being able to manage them. These behaviours escalate under attachment distress. For example anxious and dismissive-avoidants attract to each other like magnets, yet they bring out the worst in each other in terms of attachment behaviours. You can use this awareness to make better partner choices, and being able to communicate triggers will help you work together with partners to create safe and satisfying relationships. Going to therapy or doing your own work like reading around the topic and meditation are going to help hugely. You can learn more about attachment styles, including what parenting styles cause them by visiting www.emotionenhancement.com

29/11/2020

It honestly is that simple. Become the person you seek and you’re bound to bump into someone else doing the same. The path to “getting a partner” isn’t that complex. It requires setting the intention, showing up to life (i.e. demonstrating that you truly want that), and then making the choices that are likely to get you there.