Myaku Psychotherapy

Myaku Psychotherapy Counsellor and Psychotherapist offering sessions in London and online

What happens when delay gratification gets put on a pedestal?When all you can think about is achieving your dream.  A go...
12/03/2026

What happens when delay gratification gets put on a pedestal?
When all you can think about is achieving your dream.

A good exposition of the Pixar movie Soul. On why it is important to also live in the present.

LInk in comments.

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Humor is important during wartime because it helps people psychologically, socially, and even politically to cope with e...
06/03/2026

Humor is important during wartime because it helps people psychologically, socially, and even politically to cope with extreme stress and uncertainty. The below are a few noted benefits:

1. Psychological coping with fear and trauma
2. Restoring a sense of control
3. Strengthening group bonding
4. Safe criticism under censorship
5. Reframing tragedy

Give yourself permission to laugh, it is not disrespectful, but an important outlet to process the multiple layers of your feelings, and help you become more in control again, to help those around you.

Finding a safe space to talk is also very effective, call up a good friend or reach out now to book in a session. Link in bio.

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Have you ever heard of a grandparent being more strict with their grandchild over their own children? I reckon the answe...
27/02/2026

Have you ever heard of a grandparent being more strict with their grandchild over their own children?

I reckon the answer is -- Never.

So why do we only hear complains about grandparents being too lenient and spoiling the grandchildren, but never the other way around?

“A lot of people see becoming a grandparent as a chance to ‘do over’ parenthood, and maybe make up for some of the things that they wish they had done the first time around."

Maybe, with age and experience, we all come to realise grace and acceptance is ultimately more nurishing and healthy (authoratative parenting style), over rule-following and punishment (authoritarian parenting style).

Sure overdoing it might lead to permissive parenting style, but still, maybe this overcorrection is a reflection of what the parenting landscape had been.

Maybe it is saying something about the pressures parents put on their children (and themselves), versus the results they reap when their children become adults.

Would love to hear your thoughts.

Source in comment.

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"Traditions are just peer pressure from dead people" - Eliot SchreferLunar New Year took place last week and depending o...
25/02/2026

"Traditions are just peer pressure from dead people" - Eliot Schrefer

Lunar New Year took place last week and depending on the traditions you follow, you are either fully done with it, or you still have a few more days' worth of festivities ahead.

Or maybe you are still upset over disagreements with other family members over what traditions to follow.

Instead of labelling some traditions as 'outdated' or 'incorrect' , it will be more effective to explore the meaning behind the activities, and find new ways to achieve it within modern day sesibilities.

Most traditions mean well for their context and history, but some methods can be discriminatory or limiting by modern standards.

You can respond in a few ways:

Reinterpret – Keep the ritual, change the meaning.
Adapt – Keep the value, update the practice.
Retire – Let it go entirely.

Having a frank discussion can often lead to new options and opportunities going forward, and for everyone to feel acknowledged and their wishes respected.

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" Be watchful, therefore, of the choices of others, but not judgemental. Know that their choice is perfect for them in t...
04/02/2026

" Be watchful, therefore, of the choices of others, but not judgemental. Know that their choice is perfect for them in this moment now -- yet stand ready to assist them should the moment come when they seek a newer choice, a different choice, a higher choice." -- (Walsch, 1997, Conversations With God, p.47)

The path to genuine help and longlasting empowerment embodied nicely in the quote above, and that is my approach with my clients. Stay ready and prepared, never unsolicited. You can be your true selves here, as many selves as you have.

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Came across this Star Ferry display, an iconic transportation mode in Hong Kong,  in a German flea market, among tens of...
22/01/2026

Came across this Star Ferry display, an iconic transportation mode in Hong Kong, in a German flea market, among tens of thousands of other memorabilia pieces from around the world.

I wonder what sort of journey has it had? What meaning did it carry for its owner?

We often collect things to affirm our identity, sense of belonging, and emotional connection to aspects of our lives.

How do you choose what to collect, what to keep, and what to toss away?

As it goes with physical collection, so does your mental collection. Do you sometimes find it hard to make room for your new self? Let go of old traits and thinkings that are no longer the current you?

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Welcome back. I hope you made some good memories during the hoilday period.If January means going back to your day job o...
06/01/2026

Welcome back. I hope you made some good memories during the hoilday period.

If January means going back to your day job or school, take time to welcome the return of routine, and here's why:

Structure: You found out what worked for you in 2025, time to go back to good habits without all the holiday distractions.

Connection: We often use the holidays to reconnect with distant friends and relateives. But it is the people closer in proximity to us that can offer support readily.

Progress: An ongoing job or school responsibility can help us feel validated, promote self worth, and sense of achievement as we compare to ourselves from last year.

Rest: No more party invites, no more Christmas Pop Ups, .. yes it's time to give yourself time to recharge. Enjoy the mundane yet beneficial things you have brought into your life.

So go ahead, load up the laundary machine with your favorite detergent and optimal spin cycle and catch up on some Netflix.

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(Part 7 of 7)Spending holiday seasons away from family and loved ones can be very tough. Maybe you are away due to work,...
23/12/2025

(Part 7 of 7)

Spending holiday seasons away from family and loved ones can be very tough.
Maybe you are away due to work, studies, or other factors outside your control.

Here are some key things to beware of—and ways to manage them—so loneliness doesn’t quietly take over.

Remember you are not the only one feeling this way.

- Think of years past how would people deal with being away from family and friend?
- Think of your parent's generation, how did they deal with being away?
- Create your tradition with the resources and connection that you have. It doesn't have to be the same as what other people do.
- Sets goals for yourself to achieve this hoilday season, try something different, add to your own experiences.
- Make plans for after the holidays so you have other things to look forward to.

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(Part 6 of 7)Spending holiday seasons away from family and loved ones can be very tough. Maybe you are away due to work,...
22/12/2025

(Part 6 of 7)

Spending holiday seasons away from family and loved ones can be very tough.
Maybe you are away due to work, studies, or other factors outside your control.

Here are some key things to beware of—and ways to manage them—so loneliness doesn’t quietly take over.

6. Not Creating New Meaning

Beware:�Waiting for holidays to “pass” can make them feel empty and endless.
What helps:
* Volunteer (shelters, community kitchens, spiritual or community groups).
* Start a personal ritual: a yearly hike, letter to yourself, special meal.
* Focus on contribution, not just celebration.

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(Part 5 of 7)Spending holiday seasons away from family and loved ones can be very tough. Maybe you are away due to work,...
20/12/2025

(Part 5 of 7)

Spending holiday seasons away from family and loved ones can be very tough.
Maybe you are away due to work, studies, or other factors outside your control.

Here are some key things to beware of—and ways to manage them—so loneliness doesn’t quietly take over.

5. Silence About Your Feelings

Beware:�Thinking “others have it worse” or “I should be grateful” can keep you from acknowledging loneliness.

What helps:
- Remind yourself it's ok to be in need. It's ok to text a friend because you want to chat.
- Talk about it with a trusted person - a friend, community member, or therapist. Even a familiar barista or barberer will do.
- Remember: gratitude and loneliness can coexist. It's ok to be the friend in need sometimes.

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(Part 4 of 7)Spending holiday seasons away from family and loved ones can be very tough. Maybe you are away due to work,...
19/12/2025

(Part 4 of 7)
Spending holiday seasons away from family and loved ones can be very tough.
Maybe you are away due to work, studies, or other factors outside your control.

Here are some key things to beware of—and ways to manage them—so loneliness doesn’t quietly take over.

4. Overworking or Over-Scrolling

Beware:�Using work or screens to numb feelings can increase emptiness later.

What helps:
* Set gentle boundaries on work and phone use. Mix it up with interactions with people.
* Balance distractions with something grounding: journaling, walking, cooking. So you are not passively receiving information.
* Ask yourself: Is this helping me rest, or helping me avoid? If it is to avoid, go outside for a walk, call a friend, text a friend, initiate conversations.

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(Part 3 of 7)Spending holiday seasons away from family and loved ones can be very tough. Maybe you are away due to work,...
18/12/2025

(Part 3 of 7)
Spending holiday seasons away from family and loved ones can be very tough.
Maybe you are away due to work, studies, or other factors outside your control.

Here are some key things to beware of—and ways to manage them—so loneliness doesn’t quietly take over.

3. Isolation Through Withdrawal

Beware:�Loneliness can push you to stay inside, avoid invitations, or tell yourself you “don’t belong.”

What helps:
* Say yes to low-pressure invitations (coffee, walks, volunteering).
* Create structure: plan your days instead of letting things happen as if on auto-pilot.
* Even brief human contact (gym, phone calls, café) is good to instill sense of connected ness.

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