My Online Therapy

My Online Therapy Myonlinetherapy.com is UK's first virtual psychology clinic.

Are you the Chandler in your life? Do tears not flow easily for you - about anything at all? There are many reasons why ...
09/06/2022

Are you the Chandler in your life? Do tears not flow easily for you - about anything at all?

There are many reasons why you might struggle to shed a tear or two. It might be because of a physical ailment but, more often than not, an inability to cry says a lot about our emotional state, our beliefs and prejudices about crying, or our past experiences and trauma.

Maybe your lack of waterworks stems from a medical condition, medication you're on, eye surgery - or even living in a hot and windy climate.

But it could stem from mental health issues, too - surprisingly, many people with depression struggle to cry. Some people say their depression feels like numbness or emptiness, meaning that emotional situations don't elicit the response you'd normally expect.

You could also be suffering from repressed emotions, meaning you struggle to get in touch with your feelings, or societal pressure - maybe you've had it drummed into you that crying is embarrassing and childish, and as such you struggle to do it even when you feel like you want to.

You know the feeling: you're sitting in a lecture or a tutorial, and all these other clever people are making insanely d...
08/06/2022

You know the feeling: you're sitting in a lecture or a tutorial, and all these other clever people are making insanely detailed, eloquent points about the week's reading - and you have no idea what they're on about.

'Everyone is so much smarter than me', you might think, or 'I don't belong here, but these other people do'. If these thoughts sound familiar to you, you'll have more than a passing acquaintance with imposter syndrome.

If it resonates with you, you’re not alone. Around 70% of people have experienced imposter syndrome at some point in their lives, according to the International Journal of Behavioural Science.

In reality, you feel this way because the bar was set too high for you…. Too high for anyone. In essence, you feel defective for not being able to meet the IMPOSSIBLE.⁣

But it doesn't always have to feel like you're the only idiot in a room full of geniuses - and what's more, when you think that's the case, it really isn't.

Unravelling where this feeling stems from (if possible, alongside your therapist) is the first big step to overcoming Imposter Syndrome.

Next time you're dealing with a painful emotion, try 'putting on the brakes.'Firstly, acknowledge how you’re feeling rig...
07/06/2022

Next time you're dealing with a painful emotion, try 'putting on the brakes.'

Firstly, acknowledge how you’re feeling right now. - this is easy to do, just try saing ‘I’m noticing... that I’m feeling angry” or “I’m noticing… that I’m feeling sad”.

Then sit or stand up straight, and feel your body waking up. Push your feet down into the floor and try to feel the sensations in the muscles of your legs and feet. Make fists with your hands, squeeze them tight - then open them up again, and repeat this over and over.

Now look around you, and silently name three or four things you can see. And then two or three things you can hear. Now reach out and touch one or two objects, and make sure to notice what they feel like.

So right now, there is this painful emotion, AND there are the sensations in your hands and feet, AND all the things you can see, hear and feel. Keep going with this for as long as it feels helpful, noticing what emotions arise, and then noticing any sensations in your body.

Emotions move and change in their own good time. Always remember that no matter how big your emotions get, they can never get bigger than you.

Drop a 🚗 emoji if you're committed to putting the brakes on next time you're dealing with a painful emotion.

If this resonated with you, why not check out our Self-care Courses? Self-care is a one-stop library of evidence-based therapy skills and techniques, all at your fingertips. The courses will take you through the skills and techniques you’d learn during therapy, helping you to make daily mental and emotional well-being practices more sustainable.

https://bit.ly/MOTselfcare

Change can be wonderful - but it can also be scary. That’s because change takes us out of our comfort zone. But progress...
06/06/2022

Change can be wonderful - but it can also be scary. That’s because change takes us out of our comfort zone. But progress is impossible without change.

If you’re feeling stuck this Monday morning, therapy is the perfect place to set the wheels in motion to bring meaningful, life-affirming changes to your life 💪🏻

Sadness, fatigue, loss of interest in activities you used to enjoy - many of us are familiar with some of the main sympt...
02/06/2022

Sadness, fatigue, loss of interest in activities you used to enjoy - many of us are familiar with some of the main symptoms of depression.

But there are many more effects someone suffering from depression might experience - it's important to be aware of them so you can spot them if they start to occur for yourself, or for others.

When you’re feeling anxious, do you try to understand why you’re thinking or feeling like this? We’re all guilty of pinn...
31/05/2022

When you’re feeling anxious, do you try to understand why you’re thinking or feeling like this?

We’re all guilty of pinning our hopes on understanding - that understanding why we’re feeling anxious, will help us to stop feeling anxious.

But that’s where we’re wrong.

Think about the example of a car. Cars are full of hundreds of components - parts, engines, motors, brake systems - the lot.

Do you know how your car works? Do you stand beside it, trying to understand everything last thing about what enables it to move around and get your from place to place?

Let’s be honest - everybody just accepts that cars work, and then they get in them, and drive to wherever they want to go.

If what you want out of your car is simply to get home, then understanding the car won’t help you get there.

Similarly, if your simple goal is to feel better, then understanding the complexities of why you’re feeling a certain way isn’t going to help you get there.

We all have one - that one friend who takes days to get back to you, no matter how pressing the situation or how urgent ...
30/05/2022

We all have one - that one friend who takes days to get back to you, no matter how pressing the situation or how urgent the message.

It can be easy to find yourself getting annoyed at these 'bad repliers' in our lives - but today, let's take a minute to think about why someone might be a slowpoke at responding to you.

It could be busyness (feeling overwhelmed with messages) causing the slow response times, or they might have underlying anxieties that lead them to be a bad replier.

Sometimes it can also be about control. When we feel anxious and overwhelmed, we might try to take control of the situation i.e. “It’s up to me when I get back to someone”. It’s a way of avoiding a feeling of being coerced to engage with someone (or something) in moments we don’t wish to.

So next time you find yourself raging at your 'bad replier' friend, take a second to think what could be causing their behaviour.

Do you sometimes find yourself full of rage with your friends, family or colleagues - but with no good reason at all? It...
27/05/2022

Do you sometimes find yourself full of rage with your friends, family or colleagues - but with no good reason at all?

It's totally normal to get angry sometimes, if somebody has let you down or done something malicious. But if you feel the red mist descending all too frequently, something deeper might be up.

Try to understand the underlying causes for why you’re feeling angry.

Make a list of your triggers, and what you need from others. Try to identify whether there may be a more vulnerable feeling beneath your anger.

Anger tends to be a secondary response to feelings of shame and vulnerability. Practice mindfulness to calm your mind and keep your emotional state at a different baseline.

If these tactics don't work, the cause could be more deeply rooted and you may benefit from seeing a therapist who can provide a more structured intervention plan.

Happiness looks good on everyone.
26/05/2022

Happiness looks good on everyone.

Your power lies in determing what you can control - your attitude.Start the week off right by committing to control your...
25/05/2022

Your power lies in determing what you can control - your attitude.

Start the week off right by committing to control your reactions to whatever happens.

23/05/2022

It’s Monday, a day on which many of us will have made grand declarations about starting to work on our personal goals. We’ve all told ourselves from time to time that ‘from Monday next week, I’ll start on that project’, or ‘from Monday, I’m going to start exercising more’. But is this a good way to think about setting goals?

The problem with setting high expectations for Mondays is that it might be easier to make throwaway promises to ourselves that are either unrealistic or too vague. For example, we might convince ourselves that being unhealthy this week is OK because, “from Monday, I’ll be healthier”.

It doesn’t matter what day of the week you decide to set a goal for yourself, the most important thing is that those goals are specific and achievable.

Take some time out of your day for some self-compassion.Place your hand over your heart… Feel the rise and fall of your ...
20/05/2022

Take some time out of your day for some self-compassion.

Place your hand over your heart… Feel the rise and fall of your chest, and the warmth of your hands against your skin…As you do this, ask yourself, “what do I need to hear right now?”

It might be words like: “I’m here for you”, “May I be kind to myself”, “May I find ease” What words speak kindness for you? They might be the same words you offer a friend when they’re feeling down. Try offering this to yourself right now.

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About Us

At My Online Therapy, we’re on a mission to make therapy accessible. By providing on-the-spot access to first class psychologists in multiple different ways, alongside digital psychological and educational tools, we want to put the power of change back into each and every person’s hands. We enable people to become the best version of themselves so that they can build a life with greater meaning, fulfilment and purpose.

We envisage a world where mental health is just as much about prevention as it is cure. Where the relationship you have with yourself is just as important as the relationships you have with others. Because when things change inside of you, they begin to change around you too.

We are a small, dedicated team passionate about psychological therapy and the powerful changes it can bring to people’s lives.

Radical change begins with you. Sometimes it’s just about finding the right guidance to lead us onto the right track.