Zoe Plant ADHD Coaching and Supervision

28/01/2026

Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD) & AuDHD in Women – Let’s Talk About It!

Alright, let’s get real about something that comes up a LOT in our community: Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD).

RSD = big feelings. It’s that gut-punch of emotional pain you get from even the tiniest whiff of rejection, criticism, or failure, real or imagined. If you’ve got ADHD and/or Autism, you’re probably nodding along.

But honestly, anyone can experience it.

Now, for women, RSD can be extra sneaky. We’re often told to “hold it together,” so we end up bottling things up, people-pleasing, or just quietly burning out.

AuDHD – The Double Whammy
AuDHD is when someone is both Autistic and has ADHD. Not just a double label, this combo brings its own unique flavour to life. Women with AuDHD? Often missed or mislabelled, thanks to masking, stereotypes, and all the fun (not) gendered expectations.

How RSD Shows Up in AuDHD Women
Emotional pain that feels way out of proportion after criticism or exclusion
Mood swings, withdrawal, or anxiety after even minor feedback
Avoidance, perfectionism, or going into overdrive to “make up” for things
Loads of internalised shame and self-criticism (especially if you’re not getting support)

Why Do We Miss It?
We’re raised to be “nice” and accommodating, so we hide the struggle
Masking, fawning, and people-pleasing are survival skills
ADHD impulsivity + Autism sensitivity = RSD dialled up to 11

What Actually Helps?
Validation: RSD is real and it hurts. No shame.
Boundaries: Rest and self-kindness are not optional, they’re survival tools
Psychoeducation: Learning about RSD and AuDHD = less shame, more self-advocacy
Trauma-informed support: Safety, autonomy, and gentle emotional regulation
Community: Connecting with other neurodivergent women can be a total game-changer

For the Practitioners Among Us
Please, hold space for the messiness, don’t call it “overreacting”
Watch your language: sensitivity is not a flaw
Be flexible, client-led, and check in about safety

Let’s keep this conversation going, share your thoughts, experiences, or questions below!

15/01/2026

I am now a fully qualified clinical supervisor offering my services to counsellors and coaches online and in person.

14/01/2026

ADHD & Masking in Women: The Hidden Effort

Ever felt like you deserve an Oscar for pretending to be "normal"?
Welcome to the world of ADHD masking, where women become experts at hiding their quirks, losing their keys, and surviving on tea and sheer willpower.

What is Masking?
Masking is basically putting on your "together" face (even when you’re one missed train away from a meltdown).

It’s:
Sitting still in meetings when your legs want to do the can-can
Rehearsing conversations in your head like you’re prepping for the West End
Writing lists on every scrap of paper… and then losing the lot or never looking at them again
Smiling politely while your brain is off planning tomorrow’s dinner (or a quick escape)

Why Do Women Mask?
Because apparently, we’re supposed to be organised, serene, and never forget birthdays (ha!)
To avoid being labelled “scatterbrained” or “a bit much”
After years of being told to “just try harder” or “pay attention, Embody Peace and Love

The Cost of Masking
Utter exhaustion: Like running a marathon in wellies
Anxiety and burnout: Because keeping up appearances is a full-time job
Losing yourself: Sometimes you forget who you actually are under all those layers of “togetherness”

Signs You’re Masking Like a Pro
You feel like you’re acting in a BBC drama every time you leave the house
You collapse in a heap after social events (preferably with biscuits or ice cream in my case)
You’re on high alert for every tiny mistake, (ever find yourself jumping at everything?)
You rarely let anyone see you flustered (unless it’s the dog)

What Actually Helps?
Self-compassion: Masking is survival, not failure. You’re not broken.
Safe spaces: Find your people (the ones who won’t judge if you forget their name)
Gentle unmasking: Try letting your real self out in safe moments, a bit of stimming, a bit of honesty, maybe even mismatched socks
Professional support: ADHD-informed therapy or coaching can help you drop the mask.

05/01/2026

Can I ask for support please and to follow my insta page, I am rebuilding after losing my old page. Thanks in advance

276 Followers, 162 Following, 46 Posts - See Instagram photos and videos from Zoe Plant Counselling, Coaching & Supervision Maidstone ()

31/12/2025

I would like to take this opportunity to wish you a Happy New Year and thank you for your support over the last year.

May 2026 bring you luck, peace and happiness.

See you next year!

Zoe

19/12/2025

“You’re so cold.”

“You have no emotions.”

These are things many people with AuDHD (Autism and ADHD) hear far too often. The reality is, AuDHD people absolutely have feelings, sometimes incredibly intense ones. The difference is, they might process or express those emotions differently, or it might take a bit longer for them to surface.

For many, years of masking, hiding their true selves to fit in, and people-pleasing have made it even harder to show what’s really going on underneath. Sometimes, it’s safer or easier to keep feelings tucked away, especially if you’ve been misunderstood or judged in the past. Others might find it difficult to find the right words in the moment, or may show they care through actions rather than through outward displays of emotion.

If you know someone who seems distant, reserved, or “too quiet,” especially if they’re neurodivergent, try not to assume they don’t feel deeply. Often, they’re carrying a lot beneath the surface, just in their own way.

Let’s keep challenging these stereotypes and make space for all the different ways people process, express, and sometimes protect their emotions. Everyone deserves to be understood on their own terms.

08/12/2025

05/12/2025

I am offering 6 people a free Supervision session as part of my qualification as an online supervisor. Please DM me if you are interested.

04/12/2025

https://the-coachellor-method.kit.com/7d041171b0

I offer reflective, collaborative supervision from my practice in Maidstone and online UK-wide. My approach is trauma-informed, neurodiversity-affirming, and shaped around your real needs, not a one-size-fits-all model.