Jill Attree - Grief and Loss Specialist

13/02/2026

Thank you to Grief Specialists for the opportunity to write this article. If you would like to chat further please do contact me. Tel: 07940542660. www.whenlifewobbles.com

Thank you to Jill Attree - Grief and Loss Specialist for today's article, rather timely ahead of Valentine's Day. Moving into a new relationship after loss can feel both hopeful and deeply complicated. For many people who’ve experienced bereavement, opening up to love again isn’t just about dating, it’s about working your way through vulnerability, trust, memories of the person they lost, and the fear of hurting someone new, or being hurt by them.

Jill explores how intimacy after bereavement shows up in real life, how grief influences connection, and practical ways to build closeness with a new partner while remembering your past.

Read more here: https://www.griefspecialists.org/post/finding-intimacy-with-a-new-partner-after-loss

10/02/2026

Facing Valentine’s Day After Loss.

For many people, Valentine’s Day is a day filled with hearts, flowers, and declarations of love. When you’re grieving, it can feel like a day that shines a harsh light on what’s missing.
Whether you’ve lost a partner, a loved one, or even the sense of connection that once made the day meaningful, Valentine’s Day can stir up sadness, longing, and even anger. It can be a painful reminder of love interrupted, and of the space that grief leaves behind. It can feel like those around you may be celebrating love, but your heart is doing something entirely different, it’s learning how to hold love and loss at the same time.

When Love and Loss Collide

Valentine’s Day is designed to celebrate togetherness. But when your person is no longer here, the day can feel isolating. You may notice memories flooding back, the sound of their laugh, the way they made you feel safe, or the small rituals you once shared.
It’s normal to feel pulled between wanting to honour that love and wanting to avoid the pain altogether. Both responses are human. There’s no “right” way to face a day like this when your heart is still healing.

Allow Yourself to Feel What Comes

One of the kindest things you can do for yourself on Valentine’s Day is to allow whatever emotions arise, without judgment. Grief is not linear, and special dates often reopen tender places in the heart. The places we may feel scared to visit.
You might feel waves of sadness, bursts of anger, or moments of unexpected peace. Let them all come. These emotions are both natural and normal. They’re part of your ongoing connection to what you’ve lost. If tears come, let them. If laughter surfaces, welcome it. Both are signs that your heart is still alive, still capable of love.

Redefining What Love Means

After loss, Valentine’s Day can be an opportunity, not to celebrate as before, but to redefine love in a way that honours your present reality. Love doesn’t disappear when someone dies or leaves. It changes form. It becomes memory, legacy, compassion, and gratitude.

Sometimes, it becomes self-love, learning to tend to your own needs with gentleness and care. You might choose to spend the day quietly, journaling, lighting a candle, walking in nature, or writing a letter to your loved one. Or you might connect with friends who understand. There’s power in choosing how you acknowledge the day rather than letting it happen to you.

If You’re Opening to New Love

For some, grief and new love coexist. You may be starting to feel drawn to connection again, and that can bring its own mix of hope and guilt.
Remember: finding love again is not a betrayal of the past. It’s a continuation of your capacity to love. It’s love expanding, not replacing. You’re allowed to carry what was, while opening to what might be.

A Gentle Reminder

Valentine’s Day after loss is not about pretending to be okay. It’s about acknowledging your heart exactly as it is - broken, healing, human, and still capable of love.
You are not alone in this. Many others are walking this same quiet path through February, learning that love doesn’t end; it simply evolves.
Be gentle with yourself.
Your love story didn’t end, it changed shape.
If you are struggle with grief, know that support is available. Do contact me if you would like to chat further. TEL 07940542660

17/12/2025

My dad ❤️. Dad another year goes by. We will be celebrating you and Sharon on Friday when we go out for our Christmas meal. We will raise that glass of Drambuie high. Cheers dad 🥃. I love you xx ❤️❤️

11/12/2025

09/12/2025

9th December. Another year has passed. Another year without my sister, my big sister. The memories, the love, the laughter will always stay with me. I love you Sharon. Thank you for helping me become who I am today. Forever my guiding light xx ❤️

09/12/2025

If you’re grieving this season, please know this: there is no “right” way to get through Christmas. Some days you may feel okay, and other days the weight of missing them feels unbearable. Both are valid.

Grief has a way of showing up louder at this time of year — in the empty chair, the traditions that don’t feel the same, the moments you wish they were still here for you. Some days you may feel okay, and other days you are just about getting through, learning that both can exist at the same time.
Give yourself permission this Christmas — to change traditions, to say no when you need to, to talk about the one you miss, and to feel whatever comes up without judging it. Joy may still find you in small moments, and when it does, allow yourself to feel it without guilt.
If you’re carrying grief this Christmas too, please know you’re not alone. You don’t have to be strong, cheerful, or “over it.” Just showing up — in whatever way you can — is enough.
Holding space for all of us who are missing someone this Christmas 🤍

03/12/2025

This National Grief Awareness Week (2nd–8th December) we would like to highlight the importance of recognising how deeply and differently grief can affect people.

The annual campaign is led by The Good Grief Trust and this year's theme is “Growing with Grief”.

Our latest article encourages open conversations about grief and reminds us that compassionate support can make a meaningful difference.

For anyone feeling the impact of loss, or for anyone supporting someone who is, our article offers reflection, guidance and a reminder that help is available.

https://www.griefspecialists.org/post/standing-with-those-who-grieve-supporting-national-grief-awareness-week-2025

15/10/2025

Wave of Light - tonight 19:00 🕯

🌱 A message of hope
Each loss is a story, a love, a memory that matters. During Baby Loss Awareness Week, we light a candle not just for loss, but for visibility, for healing, and for change.
We hope for:
✨ Better support and understanding for grieving families
✨ Medical research and improved care to prevent loss
✨ A world where grief is held, voices are heard, and no one feels alone
If you’ve felt this kind of grief, your baby mattered — and they’ll always matter. 💗

10/10/2025

Baby loss, regardless of gestational age, is a deeply emotional and often isolating experience. Whether the loss occurs early in pregnancy, during later stages, or even shortly after birth, the grief is profound. Each loss represents the hopes, dreams, and bond that parents begin to form from the moment they learn they are going to become parents.
Society sometimes tends to differentiate grief based on how far along a pregnancy was, but the truth is, no loss is "too early" or "less significant." For the parents, whether it’s six weeks or six months, the attachment to their baby is real. The plans they’ve begun to make, the visions of a future with their child—these are shattered, leaving them to navigate an immense void.
Emotional responses to baby loss are diverse. Some may feel numb, others overwhelmed by sorrow. Guilt, confusion, and anger are also common, as parents question why this happened or what could have been done differently. It’s important to understand that these feelings are valid and natural.
What’s often overlooked is that loss at any gestation can carry a deep sense of loneliness. Parents may feel hesitant to talk about their grief, especially if their loss was early in pregnancy. They may fear their pain won’t be understood or that it will be dismissed. Yet, sharing these experiences can be a vital part of healing.
Support is key—whether it’s through loved ones, counselling, or joining a community of those who have walked a similar path. Every grieving parent deserves space to honour their child, no matter how brief their life may have been.
The message we should send to those experiencing baby loss is clear: Your loss matters. Your grief is valid. Your well-being matters. Together we care.
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09/10/2025

Today marks the start of Baby Loss Awareness Week 2025, a time to come together to remember and honour the precious babies lost too soon and support families who have experienced the heartache of miscarriage, stillbirth, or infant loss. A time to reflect, remember and reach out. Grief after baby loss can feel confusing, hopeless and often isolating.

Every baby matters, every story deserves to be heard.

For all those who have suffered baby loss my heart goes out to you. Together we can raise awareness, shares stories and advocate for better support and care for those affected by this profound loss. If you are grieving the loss of a baby you don't have to face it alone. If you would like to share your story please do contact me.

www.whenlifewobbles.com
TEL: 07940542660

Please share - you never know who may need to see this.

27/08/2025

I wanted to pop on here today to just express my gratitude to absolutely every person who is involved in fighting the enormous fires up and down the country at this time. The way that they ALL pull together and work as a team is something else. These people put their life on the line to keep us safe. This summer I have really felt ALL the losses that come from these fires. So I say a HUGE heartfelt thankful to our fire service, our farmers, the game keepers and volunteers. You are all incredibly courageous. THANK YOU ❤️ 🔥 ❤️

24/04/2025

I did say that there were many things I wish people understood about grief. Here is another one I hear so much.

I wish people understood they didn’t have to hide their emotions.
So often, someone will sit across from me and say quietly,
“I’m going to cry now…”
And it’s said like a question.
As if they’re asking for permission.
As if tears are something to apologise for.
You don’t have to smile when you’re breaking inside.
You don’t have to keep saying “I’m fine” when you’re anything but.
You don’t have to protect everyone else from your pain.
Somewhere along the way, we seem to have learnt to tuck our emotions away.
To stay composed. That tears make people uncomfortable.
That we need to be strong and that “strong” means holding it all in.
Grief isn’t meant to be tidy.
It’s not polite or predictable.

Grief is meant to be felt. Not hidden. Not buried beneath busy days or polite smiles.
You don’t have to hold yourself together for anyone else’s comfort.
Your pain is not a burden.
Your tears are not a weakness.
You are allowed to feel - fully, honestly, unapologetically.
And if the tears come, let them.
They’re part of the love.
Part of the release.
Part of being human.
There is nothing weak about being real.