Shoreham Counselling

31/10/2023

On what has become a daily routine of walking I have this wonderful place to visit. A place full of unrelenting energy, power and potential danger. It provoked thoughts about my life as a cancer patient and how out of control it can feel. How having this new identity, or rather label, can feel more powerful than who I feel I truly am whilst subjected to being thrown against the rocks and dragged back down the shore. It describes for me the cycle of appointments, surgery, recovery and waiting for results and next steps with any news to starve the feeling of disempowerment. It was there on those rocks, listening to the smashing and the dragging that I made a decision to use this energy and gently tease away from my medicated fatigue and get help and support to face the cancer diagnosis with all its push and pull on my emotions. Realising I am excellent at blocking thoughts, fears and discounting reality to protect me I called out for help and allowed my independent self to be at ease. My life seems so surreal that I can’t really connect to this being my story - a cancer story. But it is. Today I chose to take steps to embrace the fear of my diagnosis and start to speak empowerment back into my life. This looks like connecting with those in a similar place, changing the diet I have and the under clothes I wear - all underwired bras are gone! To begin to piece together a new normal seeing this as an opportunity to make things in life the way I’d like them to be. I quite like the idea from Sharon Blackie who describes going through this middle aged time of life as Hagitude - a hag with attitude, just this hag also has cancer - for now. The surgeon and oncology results team will be the next step in my journey but in the mean time I am enjoying rediscovering myself at a time of so many changes which I see reflected in the season we have just entered. My favourite one……though spring,
when she comes, will be very welcome.

28/09/2023

So this was my 50th birthday in June 2023. A time when life took an unexpected turn. The day before this amazing party I was diagnosed with breast cancer. Since then I have had many challenging experiences and been shown so much support by those guiding my care and treatment and those close to me. Life has to change now, no going back to what was but moving into a newness of what will be with something I never thought I would have to consider - Cancer and how to live like a survivor. I’d like to share some of that path I have in front of me, if I may. For now, the memory of this night and the smile across my face is due to all the wonderful people in my life that helped me ease into my 50th year despite the journey so far and the one I have ahead. Life will never cease to throw up challenges so…to begin with this one..….. ( I have yet to learn about #! 🤷🏽‍♀️😂apologies if I have done it completely wrong! ) 🙏🏼
💖💃🏾💖

04/09/2023

I love how the mind can take the simplest of resources to nurture a determined spirit and develop skill bringing joy to the soul 🥳

18/04/2023

Stepping out with this little message! Such a great weekend with BAATN gatherers and now taking a little piece of them with me into the world. ❤️👩🏿‍🤝‍👩🏾👬🏿❤️

25/10/2022

What an utter privilege to have been amongst a small audience at Shoreham Ropetackle to watch this wonderful woman in her powerfully written and superbly performed story of Nina Simone ‘Black is the colour of my Voice’.

The journey this monologue took me on was full of resonance in both the joy and pain simultaneously embedded in the struggle depicted in this play. A powerful message carried on the sublime voice of Apphia Campbell.

To me the standing ovation given for this outstanding performance felt multi edged - for this amazingly talented performer, for the sheer defiance of the songstress Nina Simone doing all she could to break through white power and domestic violence and - what felt to me - the audience standing in solidarity with the message.

Truly a moving moment in my life.

28/07/2022

Such a privilege to work with autistic students. I have supported this particular one for the last four years. So much growth. So much commitment to each other and this….simply took my breath away and brought a tear to my eye. ❤️

12/06/2022

A long awaited addition to Shoreham Counselling Cottage garden today……the humble apple tree. Fresh, crisp and sweet. It will take time to share the reward in its fruit much like the work people engage in with me. This tree was significant for me as I’m planting it on the eve of my birth to acknowledge all those who are no longer with me here on my life journey in the same way. To my dad who used apples to make delicious cider, to my brother who used to love munching on a toffee apple, to a dear family friend Aka Auntie who spent hours with me picking the wind fallen fruit to compost from her own tree and within the last few days my mum who made apple crumbles that made everything feel alright. Sounds idyllic but my own therapy journey has taken the patience to plant and grow, to bear fruit whatever they are like (the apples aren’t always sweet) and so lovingly accept the fruit with gratitude to make it sweet, nourishing and sustaining to my sense of well being be that drinking it, sweetening it, discarding it or enjoying the pudding of life in ‘soul food’.

17/05/2022

The w**ds are rampant in Shoreham Counselling cottage garden today. Just noticing their beauty. Pulled out by so many and left on a pile of discards to wither away. But they have a will to live and come back to life wherever they are - popping up in the lawn, the borders or the compost. Power to the strong and mighty w**d. Power to all my clients who strive to live wherever they are in life, however they are perceived, whatever their circumstances. I am humbled. ❤️

15/05/2022

Such valuable and humbling learning for this important subject in support of those who come to me living with domestic abuse and violence in their world, whoever they are. Remaining open minded and ready to help them remember the light in world that can seem very dark.

14/02/2022

Interesting read put so clearly. We all need time to process what happens to us in our lives and the pandemic is no different. Even though a collective experience it has been different for each one of us and for that we need time to heal.

Just like with a physical injury, rushing the recovery might only make things worse.

15/01/2022

An interesting and disturbing read that keeps it real facing the uncomfortable life experiences that can no longer go hidden, ignored or diminished. The sadness for those of us that continue to live a life of ‘hidden’ racism whilst pushing forward in an attempt to be seen and really free continues. But I have a hope that all voices will be heard. That they will be treated with respect and the difficult feelings raised will not be a reason to shut the conversation down but face the pain of this reality, together.

Aggrey Burke was the NHS’s first Black consultant psychiatrist. Rather than becoming a pillar of the establishment, he was forced to challenge it when he saw how other people of colour were treated

26/10/2021

Having completed some training in counselling children, young people and families through play, I have spent some time rediscovering stored away toys. It struck me how through life experiences and simply ‘ growing up’ can lead to storing away our free Child and forget to play. I have enjoyed reconnecting with mine today and see where it will take me in my consultation room with people who would like to use creative processes to explore their world and heal through play.