Eve's Counselling

20/05/2026

In May we had mental health week. Be Kind to your Mind. Your mental health is as crucial as your physical health.

Our emotional part of our brain impacts on our body and nervous system. Sometimes physical symptoms are a response to what we have experienced or are holding emotionally. Conversely if we are dealing with something that physically impacts us, it will affect our mental health.

The problem with mental health is…it can be invisible.

People suffering may experience a lack of empathy and understanding from those around them. Our culture does not give enough care and kindness to those who struggle. Phrases like "keep a stiff upper lip", "aren't you better yet", "what are you doing about it" "pull your socks up" or "just get on with it" comes from our British culture of keeping your emotions inside and carrying on. It’s not people’s choice to find life challenging. It can be very scary when you are stressed, burnt out, feeling unwell or not yourself mentally.

Remember outwardly it might look like someone is managing, but they may be overwhelmed. Talking and sharing what's happening helps you and others experiencing the same feel less alone.

Ways of looking after your mental health:

• Acceptance of ourselves is important. Be kind to yourself rather than critical when something goes wrong. Life is complicated and confusing and we are continually learning and make mistakes.
• Celebrate progress and every small step.
• Focus on activities and beliefs that give you purpose and have meaning, not what someone else expects of you.
• Surround yourself with people who make you feel good about yourself.
• If you feel isolated use local libraries, walks in nature and community groups that bring people together. Even if you don’t feel like it, sometimes you have to do the opposite of how you feel if you are stuck indoors.
• You didn't choose what happened to you. It is not your fault. With support you can build resilience by exploring ways to respond, manage and regulate emotion. And find an outlet that is helpful rather than harmful.
• Having realistic daily tasks can give direction, motivation and much needed structure.
• Reduce stress by being mindful and fully present in the moment. Notice thoughts, feelings, what’s going on in your body and tune into your senses. When you practice this try to let go of thoughts about past and future.

Where you can in areas of your life stop..... even if you can only spare a brief moment: rest, slow down or be still. Build in moments of calm. Listen to your body.

19/04/2026

I am available for counselling sessions.

Call me on 01865 638619 or email eve@counsellingnearyou.co.uk for support, advice or more information.

12/01/2026

Life can be hard. There are times when we don’t feel ourselves when we get hijacked by emotions or hormones that can stop us functioning, we withdraw, feel frozen by day to day activities and unable to work, we stop connecting with others. It won’t always be like this. Go slow, take each day as it comes. Hold hope. Be honest about what’s happening with people.

05/12/2025

We’re so happy to share our very first themed Shared Journeys gathering… A warm, festive Christmas Coffee Gathering for adult women in Dorset ☕️.

There are moments when life feels busy, pressured, or a little overwhelming. Our December gathering is an invitation to slow down, step away from the noise, and simply breathe again.

This space is for women seeking a moment of calm, connection, and warmth. A chance to settle with a hot drink, ease the weight on your shoulders, and be around others who understand the demands of life.

There’s no pressure to share, no group introductions, and no expectations. Just a cosy room, comfortable seating, gentle conversation if you want it. We’re creating an atmosphere that feels calm, welcoming, and unhurried. A space to just be, whether you feel like chatting or resting quietly... the simple comfort of pausing for a while.

As therapists who care deeply about comfort, safety, and genuine connection, we’ll be there to welcome you, hold the space gently, and offer support in a way that feels natural and unforced.

If you’d like to join us for this first festive gathering, you’re warmly invited.

📩 Message us privately to register your interest.

Full details, including dates, times, and locations, will be shared privately with those who reach out.

More themed coffee meet-ups will be announced soon…
and we can’t wait to welcome you.

With love,
Mel & Eve 🤍

21/11/2025

14/11/2025

You are not "broken" you are just hurting. And need someone to listen with compassion and care.

05/11/2025

What are your needs? Take time to figure this out. It really helps.

It allows us to meet our own needs in a gentle way, with care, compassion and communicate them to others. Giving ourself what we need is the most powerful thing we can do, it can have a ripple effect on people around us.

Don't assume people know what you need (or use 'should') as this can cause further problems. People are not mind readers. We have to tell people how we feel, what we need, the reasons why and be willing to admit whats ours.

When our needs are not met we feel fear, hurt, anxious and angry. We can hold onto these feelings and get stuck in a mind body loop, playing out what has happened over and over, our body reacting with stress and tension. When these feelings and physical sensations show up, use them to figure what needs are not being met.

Do you need trust, respect, honesty and loyalty?
Do you need to feel significant, valued, appreciated and acknowledged?
Do you need to feel seen for who you are, understood or heard?
Do you need to be supported, encouraged and treated fairly or equally?
Do you need to feel useful, loved or cared for?
Do you need to belong?

24/10/2025

Early warning signs in a relationship from a Hampshire Domestic Violence Service for teenagers, young people and adults of all ages.

💔Many of the signs that people may interpret as being attentive, caring and romantic ARE actually WARNING SIGNS of future abuse:

1. Constantly asks you where you are going, who you are with, when will you be back. This may start off being attractive because someone is concerned about you and your whereabouts. But can become intrusive and oppressive.
2. Wants to spend as much time as possible together, wants you all to him/herself. Has negative opinions about family and friends, and tries to convince you not to spend time with them. Encourages you to drop out of any outside activities and not to engage with external agencies and services.
3. Gets serious very quickly and wants to settle down together, get married, have children etc after only a few months. Puts pressure on you to accept these arrangements.
4. Come on really strong, is extremely charming and an overly smooth talker.

🚩 Other signs may reveal an underlying lack of respect for you, your wishes and needs:

5. Blames others for his/her feelings or problems. Fails to take responsibility for the consequences of his/her own actions.
6. Has unrealistic expectations and expects partner to be able to meet all his/her needs.
7. Makes all the decisions and doesn’t take into account your needs or wishes. It may take some time to notice that you are not making any decisions, as at first you may just be whisked away on dates. However, if you mention that you do not want to do what your partner has planned - they become angry or upset. This is a sign that they have no awareness of your needs.
8. Gets very upset or acts hurt if things don’t go his/her way, takes offense when others disagree with an opinion, gets very upset at the normal inconveniences of life.
9. Gets angry if their wishes are not fulfilled, or what they want to do is not anticipated.
10. Refers to people of your s*x with negative remarks, shows a lack of respect towards all women/men.
11. Unable to handle emotional or s*xual frustrations without becoming angry, sulky or withdrawing.

🗣️There may be clues in the way your partner talks about your or their past:

12. Secretive about past relationships or talks about how they were treated terribly by the ‘evil ex’.
13. Not allowed to see their children from a previous relationship, blames the ‘evil ex’ For this.
14. Accuses you of flirting with other men, does not like you talking about previous relationships or spending time with other male friends, becomes jealous easily. Although this may be presented as a sign of his/her love for you. It is not, it is a sign of possessiveness and lack of trust.

National Domestic Abuse Helpline. Call for free and in confidence, 24 hours a day: 0808 2000 247.Use our chatbot to chat to us and find information.

PARAGON is part of The YOU Trust and is their domestic abuse, s*xual violence and stalking team.
https://paragonteam.org.uk/

Paragon Dorset
0800 032 5204
ParagonDorset@theyoutrust.org.uk

16/10/2025

A new video - a brief moment to meet me.

Southbourne, Bournemouth.

15/10/2025

Our identity is shaped and influenced by others throughout our life. Our beliefs about ourselves have often been imposed by those around us, our environment, the culture and society we live in. We are affected by what people say, how they behave and how they react and respond to us. It is so easy to compare ourselves with others and feel less than. The impact of this is we can feel stressed, anxious, depressed, isolated, hopeless and stuck.

You can choose to challenge other people’s negative or critical beliefs and actions, as they are not accurate and do not reflect who you are. We have all made mistakes and won't always get it right. This is what makes us human. You can have a different relationship with yourself which is gentle, forgiving and understanding.

You have courage and can be assertive. You are valuable and worthy of respect. You are wise, resilient and capable. You are organised and responsible. You are different and interesting. You have something to offer. You can connect with others. You don’t deserve to have experienced what you did and you are not to blame.

Imagine being in control, creating an identity and way of being based on your own beliefs and what you might learn about yourself in the process.