
21/09/2023
Ooh this meme is a goodie and resonates so much, both in my own story and those of my clients.
When you’ve experienced past childhood trauma, it’s likely that you grow up on permanent high alert.
You don’t always realise it, but there’s a scared little child in you that continues to scan the world for threat.
And so with every experience, every opportunity we face, our unconscious reaction is a sense of “what can go wrong here?” “Will I be safe?”
Why? Because sadly as kids, the potential for things to go wrong was our “normal”. Not feeling safe was our “normal.”
Trying to control every situation to keep ourselves safe became our “normal.”
We’re used to things going t**s up, it feels familiar, it’s why we’re often drawn into toxic relationships…
It’s like the little kid inside us spots a dysfunctional adult from 10 paces and goes “oh yeah, I know you, I know what to do here” and gets drawn in like a moth to a flame.
BUT when things go well? Ooh no, that feels REALLY UNCOMFORTABLE.
Especially in new relationships.
When we meet healthy functioning adults, they can initially feel so nice to be around but…
Gradually, they can start to feel way too grown up and calm for us, it pushes us out of our comfort zone.
“What is this nice feeling I’m getting with you, I don’t recognise it too well but if feels so good…
In fact it feels TOO good, this is unnerving me, I don’t trust it to stay around…
I just know this is going to get taken away from me 🥹
And without us even realising it, we manage to push joy away.
It’s just one of the really sad parts of living with unresolved childhood trauma.
But one of the main reasons to get help…
Because everyone deserves to live a life where they can handle the joy 🥰
Meme credit