InnerFocus Therapy

01/05/2026

30/04/2026

Why do you feel stuck in the same patterns, even when you want to change?

In our new blog post, I break down psychological “impasses” — why they happen and practical ways to move forward.

Read the full guide and start unpicking what's keeping you stuck:
https://www.innerfocustherapy.co.uk/post/why-do-i-feel-so-stuck-a-guide-to-psychological-impasses

29/04/2026

27/04/2026

Sometimes children who stay close to a trusted adult are labelled as “clingy.”

But for many neurodivergent children, closeness isn’t a problem behaviour — it’s a way of regulating their nervous system.

When the world feels overwhelming, loud, unpredictable, or fast, staying near a safe and trusted adult can help a child feel grounded and secure. This isn’t about dependence — it’s about connection and co-regulation.

A secure attachment teaches a child:
• I am safe
• Someone is here for me
• I can return when things feel too much

From that sense of safety, confidence and independence grow over time.
Supporting a child’s need for closeness doesn’t reinforce anxiety — it builds the foundation for resilience.

25/04/2026

Bit of a recap of previous posts to match my last post about stress management

23/04/2026

Stress feels overwhelming when everything sits in your mind as one giant problem. A simple way to manage it is to sort your stress into three categories:

1️⃣ Controllable — Act Now
If it’s something you can control, fix, or take responsibility for right now, do it.
Send the email. Make the call. Start the task. Take the first step.
Action reduces stress because it removes the problem.

2️⃣ Uncontrollable (For Now) — Schedule It
Some things matter but can’t be fixed today. Waiting for a reply, a meeting next week, a decision from someone else.
Instead of worrying repeatedly, schedule when you’ll deal with it. Put it in your calendar and let your mind rest until then.

3️⃣ Hypothetical — Let It Go
“What if this goes wrong?”
“What if they think this?”
“What if something bad happens?”
If the situation is unlikely or purely hypothetical, write it down and move your attention somewhere productive. Your brain is trying to protect you, but not every possibility deserves your energy.

✨ Most stress disappears when we stop treating every thought like an urgent problem.

Sort it. Act on it. Schedule it. Or release it.

it go

21/04/2026

Not everyone is ADHD or autistic — but everyone experiences some of the traits at times. That’s because many of these behaviours are part of being human.
• Difficulty focusing
• Interrupting
• Sensory sensitivity
• Wanting routine
• Feeling overwhelmed when plans change

These are common experiences, not inherently pathological.
What makes ADHD or autism different isn’t the presence of traits — it’s the pattern:
• how often they occur
• how intense they are
• how early they began (must be lifelong)
• how much they impact day-to-day functioning
• whether they’re consistent across contexts (work, home, relationships, leisure)

Some people experience frequent, intense traits that affect daily life — but if these aren’t lifelong or are situation-specific, it’s important to consider other explanations, such as mental health difficulties or early trauma, which can present similarly.

For context:
ADHD occurs in ~2.5–4% of adults
Autism in ~1–2%

In the UK (~69.5 million):
• ADHD ≈ 1.5–2.5 million
• Autism ≈ 700,000–1.4 million

Both are widely underdiagnosed — especially in adults, women, and those with strong coping strategies.

So what we’re seeing isn’t “everyone suddenly has it” — it’s more people recognising longstanding patterns and seeking assessment at the same time.

Why does it feel so common?
• Increased awareness
• More people seeking assessment (“wave” effect)
• Algorithms → more of what you engage with
• Homophily → clustering with similar people
• Language shift → naming previously unnamed experiences

Masking also matters — many people compensate or hide difficulties, so impact isn’t always visible.

So yes — traits are universal. But neurodevelopmental conditions are about degree, persistence, and impact.

It’s not that everyone has it — it’s that we’re better at recognising what was already there.

09/04/2026

07/04/2026

The Four-Hob Life

We're told to "have it all." But nobody mentions the fuel tank runs finite.

Think of your energy like gas on a stove. You've got four burners: Health, Family, Work, Social Life. The marketing says turn them all to maximum. The reality? Your flame sputters. One goes out. Or worse—everything burns at half-strength and nothing truly nourishes.

Here's what I've learned: It's not about balance. It's about intention.

Some seasons demand the work burner roar. Others require family to take centre stage. There are times when health needs the heat, and moments when saying "no" to social obligations is the most loving thing you can do.

The guilt comes from thinking you're failing when you choose. But choosing is the point.

Ask yourself today: Which hob needs the flame right now? And what are you willing to dim to light it?