Deanah McCormack Counselling Services, Tralee, Kerry at 087 175-6857

25/11/2025

Its all about perspective. Get your mind outa the way and just do it.


https://www.facebook.com/share/r/1DF1gZCWDH/

25/11/2025

Theres so much Palpable grief and pain present at the moment. But there is also great beauty as well. The sun always rises, no matter what. 🙏

10/11/2025

Get out, as far away as possible. You cant change them. They're like big voids. Empty, Souless, heartless, no empathy, incapable of committment. They lie, cheat, steal and always have another life going on in the background. They thieve your time, peace, self esteem, confidence and anything else they can. They would sell your soul, use anyone even their own children and throw anyone under a bus for their own pleasure. Leave and don't look back.

If someone ever asked me what hell feels like,**
I’d tell them — being in a relationship with a narcissist.**
It’s a slow burn that destroys you from the inside out.**

It doesn’t start with fire — it starts with warmth.
With charm, affection, and promises that feel like forever.
You think you’ve found your person, your peace, your home.
But slowly, the light shifts.
Their love turns into control. Their words into weapons. Their apologies into manipulation.

You stop recognizing yourself.
You start apologizing for everything — even the things they did.
You question your memory, your worth, your sanity.
That’s how narcissistic abuse works — not with one big explosion, but with a thousand tiny cuts that no one else can see.

You smile in public, but your soul is bleeding in silence.
You keep hoping they’ll go back to who they were — not realizing that version never existed.
The hell of loving a narcissist isn’t just the pain they cause.
It’s the emptiness they leave behind after they’ve taken every part of you that ever believed in love.

That’s what hell feels like.
And survival — that’s what heaven starts to look like.

07/11/2025

If you're here. This is for you. Remember it 😉❤️

💕

06/11/2025

Lol.

04/11/2025

Anam Cara Support meetings for bereaved parents continue monthly from September until June each year. These peer group meetings offer a space of compassion and understanding for those grieving their child - at any stage.

Details for this month's meeting are as follows:

Anam Cara's Kerry Parent Support Evening will take place on Tuesday 11th November at 7.30pm in the Meadowlands Hotel, Tralee Co. Kerry. No registration needed.

If you know any bereaved parents who could benefit from this meeting, please let them know. No registration is needed.

To find out more about the support we offer please email us at info@anamcara.ie or call 085 288 8888.

Anam Cara support services are free of charge for as long as needed.



Kind regards

Dee Regan





Contact Number 01 4045378 or 085 2888 888

Email Address d.regan@anamcara.ie

Web Address www.anamcara.ie



Anam Cara Parental & Sibling Bereavement Support Group CLG, trading as Anam Cara is a company limited by guarantee not having a share capital, registered in Dublin Ireland with registered company number 452644.

Supporting Parents After Bereavement Offering information, resources, practical advice, links to professional organisations and services, general information for parents, extended families and also updates on forthcoming events. Our Supports About Us We aim to take a holistic approach to bereavement...

31/10/2025

They'll turn up for the photo ops and public bragging rights, but they're not interested in anything that does'nt stroke their ego or revolve around them. Thats just too much committment and they're not able for healthy relationships.

A narcissist isn’t interested in raising children — they just want to *look* like a good parent.**

To a narcissist, parenting isn’t about nurturing, guiding, or loving. It’s about image, control, and validation. They want to be *seen* as the perfect mom or dad — the one who sacrifices, who provides, who “does everything” — but behind closed doors, it’s a different story.

Their children often become extensions of their ego, not individuals with their own needs and feelings. Every success the child achieves is treated as *their* accomplishment. Every failure becomes an embarrassment that threatens their carefully crafted image. They’ll post smiles for the world to see while ignoring or criticizing the child when no one’s watching.

True parenting requires empathy, patience, and accountability — qualities a narcissist rarely possesses. Instead, they manipulate through guilt, comparison, or emotional neglect. They play favorites, pit siblings against each other, and demand loyalty over love. The child grows up learning to *perform* for approval rather than simply be accepted.

And when the child tries to express pain or boundaries, the narcissistic parent plays the victim:
“I did everything for you.”
“You’re so ungrateful.”
“You’re making me look bad.”

To them, parenting isn’t a relationship — it’s a stage. Their children are props in a performance designed to win admiration from others.

But children don’t need perfect parents; they need present ones. A narcissist can’t give that, because their love depends on attention, not connection.

So yes — a narcissist doesn’t raise children.
They raise reflections of themselves — and call it love.

21/10/2025

🙏

17/10/2025

This is for all you moms out there. Guilt is the gift that keeps giving but your intentions are always honest and pure and your love is unquestionable. There is noone out there that can be the kind of mom your child needs except you. That's why you were chosen. Be kind to yourselves. Love to you all. ❤️

So you think you’re a bad mom?

Well… let me tell you, you’re not alone.

When he was a baby, I was holding him on my hip when I took a corner too fast.

I lost my breath as I heard the thud of his sweet little noggin bounce off the corner.

He cried for about five minutes.
I cried for hours.

When he was three, I let him cook with me.

I got distracted for a moment, and didn’t notice his chubby little hand reach for the pan.

The burn barely left a mark, but that moment left a scar on my heart.

When he was five he began displaying terrible anger outburst. It became so bad, I was often afraid to take him out in public.

I would get furious with him, yell at him, punish him.

Only to later realize, he wasn’t a bad kid that deserved punishment. He was an anxious kid that needed guidance and support.

All the while I developed severe guilt for not recognizing his anxiety earlier.

When he was in 1st grade, he came home from school and asked where I’d been for author day.

Everyone else’s mom came in.

I felt faint.

I’d been visiting my nana in the hospital, and had completely forgotten.

Sure, there was a lot going on in my brain, but my kid should have been first and foremost.

He forgave me in no time.
I’ve still never forgiven myself.

Over the years, I’ve forgotten dates, deadlines, and yes, some big events.

I’ve overlooked issues that I should have given more attention to

I’ve missed some signs.

I’ve gotten too busy.

I’ve caused some pain.

I could tell you all the wrongs I’ve committed as a mother in great detail.

After all, those are the things that play over and over in our heads nightly, right?!.

All the ways we could be screwing up our kids.

It can really devour you, that mother’s guilt.

It’s a ravenous beast that feeds off regret.

Kinda like quicksand.

The more frenzied you struggle with it, the quicker it swallows you up.

But.

If you still your thoughts

Take a deep breath

And fuel yourself with radical grace

You can wade through the muck and find your way back to solid ground.

Back to the foundation of intention.

And friend, if you’re here, I know your intention.

It’s hopeful.
It’s honest.
It’s strong.
It’s pure.
And it puts Love above all else.

So instead of remembering how I’d caused an egg on my little guy's head, I remembered how I held him and sang to him through his tears.

Instead of letting the image of a burn mark on my toddler’s hand get seared into my brain, I let the memories of Mickey Mouse pancakes, gingerbread men, and sprinkled cupcakes pour in.

Rather than harp on the fact that I completely misdiagnosed my son’s anxiety, I began to sing praise for the help we got him with a professional and how far he’s come since then.

Rather than beating myself up for missing author day, I remember his smile when I walked in on Monday, the mom who might have been a day late, but still showed up. And you bet your butt I showed up to every school event since.

I’ve screwed up more times than I can count.

But those tally marks can’t outweigh all the ways love and grace have been my buoy.

And this grown boy, right here.

With this smile, this hug, this heart.

It’s all I need, to know I’m doing ok.

So if your struggling with guilt

You’re not alone.

If you think you’re a bad mom…

You’re not alone

But if you’re showing up

learning from your wrongs

And pouring all the love you have over your children.

Let me tell you,

You’re doing pretty amazing, mama. ♥️

©️ Mehr Lee
Raise Her Wild

14/10/2025

😁

07/10/2025

💯

NARCISSISTS will never co-parent with you, they will counter-parent. They don't care about the damage their constant drama causes the children, as long as it creates chaos and stress for you. This behavior is a classic trait of a narcissist, who prioritizes their own needs and desires above all else, including the well-being of their children.

Counter-parenting is a manipulative tactic used to gain control and power over the other parent, often by undermining their authority, belittling their parenting, and creating conflict. This can be incredibly damaging to the children, who may feel caught in the middle, torn between their love and loyalty for both parents.

Narcissists often use their children as pawns in their game of manipulation, using guilt, gaslighting, and emotional blackmail to control and influence their behavior. This can lead to anxiety, depression, and low self-esteem in the children, as they struggle to navigate the complex and toxic dynamics of their parents' relationship.

It's essential for the well-being of the children that the other parent remains vigilant and proactive in protecting them from the narcissist's toxic behavior. This may involve setting clear boundaries, seeking support from family, friends, or a therapist, and prioritizing the children's emotional and physical needs above all else.

By doing so, you can help mitigate the damage caused by the narcissist's behavior and provide a more stable and loving environment for your children to thrive.