04/09/2024
Idealization-In the beginning, the partner is idealized. They are put on a pedestal, and their strengths and positive traits are exaggerated. The person in the toxic relationship may shower their partner with affection, attention, and praise, creating a whirlwind romance that feels intense and special.This can lead to deep emotional attachment, making it harder for the partner to recognize or accept the negative aspects of the relationship that may emerge later.
Devaluation-Once the partner is deeply invested in the relationship, the dynamic shifts. The person who initially idealized them begins to find faults, criticize, and undermine their partner. The partner who was once idealized is now devalued. This can involve emotional manipulation, gaslighting, or other forms of psychological abuse.
Discard- After the partner has been devalued, they may be discarded emotionally, physically, or both. The person in the toxic relationship may withdraw affection, ignore their partner, or even abruptly end the relationship. This stage can be particularly confusing and painful for the partner, as it often comes without warning or clear explanation.
Re-idealization/ Hoovering- After the discard phase, the cycle may restart with re-idealization. The person who discarded their partner may attempt to reconnect, often with apologies, promises of change, or by reigniting the intense affection seen in the initial idealization phase.
Hoovering is a way to pull the partner back into the toxic cycle. It keeps the partner hooked and prevents them from moving on. This cycle can repeat multiple times, creating a pattern of emotional instability.
🧚🏻♀️🧚🏻♀️
