03/03/2025
A story ....a novel
The Chronicles of a Beekeeper in Trouble
A Hilarious Tale of Apples, Women, and Unplanned Chaos
Chapter 1: Loudspeaker Confessions
Nyua Ciothe Bar is buzzing, quite literally. The music is loud, the drinks are flowing, and my phone—oh, my phone—is on loudspeaker, because, let’s be honest, that’s the unspoken rule of bars. Favor, my self-appointed nutritionist, philosopher, and part-time life manager, is on the other end of the call, asking why I’m late.
Late for what, you ask? A royal feast of ashwagandha and meat she was supposed to prepare. A meal fit for a king—or at least a man who enjoys both herbal medicine and questionable relationship decisions. But as Favor talks, something strange happens.
"Wait… what are you doing at night in my orchard?" I ask.
There’s a pause. Then she fires back, “Why have you packed apples in khaki papers while still on the tree?”
Now, if I were a weak man, this is where my downfall would begin. But I am not. I am a beekeeper, an innovator, and, most importantly, a man who knows that khaki paper protects apples from birds without interfering with photosynthesis, unlike nylon.
Unfortunately, I’m explaining all this while Gitonga, seated next to me, is not listening. His eyes are glued to Winnie, the new waitress, who has singlehandedly reduced his IQ to that of a boiled potato.
“I’m talking about apples, Gitonga.”
“Uh-huh,” he mumbles, not even pretending to care.
That’s my cue to leave. The night has too many moving parts, and the last thing I need is Favor checking my wardrobe and finding the chief’s daughter’s clothes. (A long story, one I don’t intend to explain in a court of law.)
Chapter 2: The Favor Problem
The next morning, the rooster hasn’t even finished its morning warm-up exercises when I shake Favor awake.
“Get up. We’re leaving.”
She grumbles, rolls over, and tries to argue, but my mind is made up. I have an appointment in Nyandarua, Engineer, and I have a surprise for everyone. Favor, however, is more concerned about the fact that I skipped dinner.
“You can’t live like this,” she sighs, looking at me like I’m a lost cause.
“I can and I will,” I reply, leading her to the car.
Chapter 3: Nyandarua’s Big Surprise
Nyandarua is chilly, but the excitement in my heart keeps me warm. I have a surprise, and everyone will love it. What is it, you ask? Well, let’s just say it involves bees, unexpected guests, and a lesson no one will forget.
As I step out of the car, Gitonga is already there, grinning like a man who won a bet he shouldn’t have placed. Winnie the waitress is nowhere in sight, meaning he has rejoined reality.
“What’s the surprise?” he asks.
I smile. “You’ll see.”
And that, my friends, is where the real story begins...to be continued....
