Des has Lupus

Des has Lupus Living with a chronic illness has changed how I move through the world.

This page is where I share what lupus looks like in my body, in my life, and in my quiet moments💜

28/05/2026

❤️‍🩹I learned the hard way that survival doesn’t always look brave.

Sometimes it looks like a forced smile.
Like “I’m fine, thank you."
Like hiding the exhaustion, the pain, the fear... because this world punishes you the second you stop performing for it.

So yes, some of us became unreadable.
Not because we’re weak. Or fake. Or "skelm".
But because we adapted.

And after a while, pretending you’re okay stops feeling like a choice and becomes instinct.
💜

26/05/2026

HR is not your friend.

They are there to protect the company, not advocate for you, not counsel you, not buddy up with you.

They’ll say all the right things when needed, but never forget: you are the risk they’re managing.

24/05/2026

💜I have made peace with the fact that I, too, need reminding.

That life is not a race.
That my best is good enough.
That I don’t have to prove pain just to feel like I deserve rest.

✨️And this weekend has been one of those times.

So if your mind or body has been asking you to slow down, let this be your permission slip to do exactly that.

Save this for the days when repeating these words softly to yourself is the kindest thing you can do.

21/05/2026

✨️I never pretend to be an expert on autoimmune disease.

This page is about lived experience.

I’ve been at almost every stage this disease can drag a person through except the grave.

I’ve been healthy.
I’ve been disabled.
I’ve been at death’s door.
I’ve almost lost jobs trying to prove I was still “capable.”
I got medically boarded.
I lost people I thought would stay forever.
I spent a long time mentally falling apart while pretending I was okay.

So when I speak, I’m not speaking from a textbook.

I’m speaking as someone who has stood where you’re standing now.

If you’re newly diagnosed — I was you.
If you’re angry — I was you.
If you’re grieving your old body — I was you.
If you’re exhausted from explaining yourself — I was you.
If you feel invisible — I was you.

I’m not here to sell inspiration.
I’m not here to tell you to stay positive.

I’m here to offer what I needed when I got diagnosed:

✨️someone honest.
✨️someone who doesn’t flinch.
✨️someone who says the quiet parts out loud.

And if this page gives even one person clarity, language, or the feeling that they’re not carrying this alone, then everything this disease took from me gave me something back.💜

19/05/2026

💜 I used to think I was disciplined. Reliable. “Good under pressure.”

But looking back, a lot of what I called professionalism was actually self harm.

Functioning on panic.
Refusing to detach from that damn PC long enough to eat or stretch.
Living with constant fatigue, headaches, constantly burnt out.

Being praised for how much I could endure while quietly destroying myself.

And the scary part is how normal it all felt.

This isn’t me ROMANTICIZING collapse. It’s me showing you where that road can lead if you keep mistaking survival mode for work ambition.

Your body keeps score long before your life falls apart. Listen to it sooner than I did.💜

17/05/2026

💔Some days the inside voice is way too loud.

The dating bar is already on the pavement, and somehow because of your chronic illness, you still expected to lower it.

So instead of risking disappointment, you just stay alone.

And after a while, solitude starts feeling safer than attachment.

14/05/2026

✨️HEALING taught me that peace feels better than being chosen.

I hope everyone with an autoimmune disease reaches the stage of acceptance where your nervous system can finally unclench.

No more survival mode. No more overworking yourself for connection. Just peace. 🤍

12/05/2026

Your job is the biggest contributor to your autoimmune disease.

Yeah, I said it.
And I can say it because I lived it.

I was almost fired multiple times for being sick, while working myself into the ground for a company that would’ve replaced me before my chair got cold.

That job had me glorifying stress, normalizing exhaustion, surviving on adrenaline, panic and people pleasing.

My body was screaming long before it started shutting down. I just kept calling it “being hardworking.”

Until I had to face the truth:
the life I built was killing me.

I had to stop working to stay alive.

Had to walk away from things I loved, things I sacrificed for, things I thought defined me.

Because eventually you have to ask yourself a question nobody wants to answer:
Would your job attend your funeral…
or just post your vacancy?”

10/05/2026

❄️Winter has officially arrived, and my body has been sounding the alarm.

This drop in temperature isn’t just a seasonal change, it’s a physical battle for our joints and bones.

☕️Stay warm and stay mindful.
💭Do share in the comments what helps you manage through winter.

31/10/2025

How to protect your income while you are temporarily incapacitated and unable to work with the Sickness Benefit Claim from the Social Security Commission of Namibia 🇳🇦.

Here are the requirements and procedures.
If you have ever utilised the Sickness Benefit Claim please share your experience in the comments.

As usual, click like, share the video with someone who needs the information, save the video or comment with a purple heart 💜 if you found the video helpful. And do like the page☑️

Let me know if there is any topic you would like me to discuss as an autoimmune or chronic pain warrior living in Namibia 🇳🇦

❤️💞❤️

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