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The Right Fit Marriage Academy

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The Right Fit Marriage Academy

Africa's Marriage Academy
We educate you, Single or Married, to enjoy your Marriage Hello there! What is The Right Fit Marriage Academy? Who is this for? c. d.

My name is Modupe Ehirim and welcome to The Right Fit Marriage Academy.

1. The Right Fit Marriage Academy is a membership based online/offline learning community devoted to helping members achieve their dream of a really happy lifelong marriage relationship and a home environment that gives them joy. There are 3 levels of memberships: Bronze, Silver, and Gold. The bronze level membership is free while the silver and gold levels are paid memberships. Each membership level comes with specific set of benefits and privileges.

2. The Right Fit Marriage Academy is specifically designed to cater to the needs of married people who feel:
a. Dissatisfied with their marriage and wonder, “Is this how things will continue? Will there be a change for the better?”
b. That they are not experiencing the kind of marriage that they have dreamed of. Helpless and think that they have limited choices in their present marital situations. Sometimes emotionally and physically overwhelmed. I am honored, happy to support YOU on your journey to a happy lifelong marriage relationship and a home environment that gives you joy!

29/08/2025

CONFLICT IS INEVITABLE, DISRESPECT IS NOT.

Some years back, a couple booked a session with me.

During the session they shared with me how they had been married for five years, but always found themselves arguing over something as small as grocery shopping. The husband would always want to stick to the budget, but the wife would always want to add “extra” for the kids.

This happened frequently in their marriage and suddenly what began as a simple disagreement quickly turned tense.

During their session, they started raising their voices.

The husband said, “You never think about saving!” The wife responded back, “You never care about what the kids need!”

For a moment, it felt like they weren’t just disagreeing about groceries—they were questioning each other’s intentions. The issue wasn’t the shopping list anymore; it was the hurt from words spoken without care by both of them.

I allowed them for a moment, and when they were through. I told them.

“Every marriage has conflict—Conflict is a part of life. But disrespect? That’s optional.

Conflict can be resolved, Resolving conflicts in healthy ways can even make a couple stronger.

Disrespect, however, attacks and breaks trust and intimacy.

The key is learning to fight fair: attack the problem, not the person.

After counseling them.they agreed to do things differently..

Some weeks after their session, they called me. When I asked them how things were going they told me that they still argue sometimes, but they’ve learned to pause, listen, and remember they’re on the same team.

The truth is, every marriage or relationship will face conflict—it’s part of what happens when two different people start learning to share life together.

Disagreements over finances, parenting, habits, or even small daily choices are normal.

Conflict isn’t the enemy; in fact, it can lead to deeper understanding and stronger connection.

The real danger is when conflict turns into disrespect.

Here's How to Handle Conflict Without Disrespect

📍Use words that build, not break.

📍Focus on the issue, not on attacking your partner.

📍Listen with the intent to understand, not just to respond.

📍Take a pause when emotions run high.

Remember: you and your spouse are on the same team, not opposing sides.

Conflict is a natural part of every relationship, but disrespect should never be. When you choose respect, even in heated moments you will still protect the foundation of your marriage.

So disagree, debate, and even argue, but do it with honor. Because love can survive conflict, but it cannot survive constant disrespect.

🎯 Stream 9 of the Get Yourself Ready for Marriage 12-week Group Coaching Program starts soon. Check my bio or the comments section for the link to register

©️ Modupe Ehirim

28/08/2025

WHY LOVE NEEDS EFFORT, NOT JUST FEELINGS

Love is beautiful, but let’s be honest, feelings alone can’t sustain a marriage or relationship.

The butterflies you felt at the beginning were real, but over time, life happens. Work stress, kids, bills, and everyday responsibilities can dull the initial spark.

This is where many couples get it wrong: they believe that if the feelings fade, love is gone.

The truth is, real love is not just about what you feel—it’s about what you do.

Here's Why Love Needs Effort:

Feelings are fleeting; they come and go. But effort is intentional, it’s the glue that holds a relationship together when emotions fluctuate.

Effort is choosing to listen even when you’re tired, showing affection even when you don’t feel like it, apologizing even when your pride says no, and making time even when life feels too busy.

Effort is also what makes love grow deeper. Little things like sending a thoughtful message, planning a date night, holding hands, or giving your partner your undivided attention remind them that they matter. Without effort, love becomes passive; with effort, love becomes active, vibrant, and lasting.

Remember, love is not just about saying “I love you”—it’s about showing it, consistently, in ways that nurture connection.

So if you want your love to thrive, don’t just rely on emotions—put in the effort that keeps those emotions alive.

🎯 Stream 9 of the Get Yourself Ready for Marriage 12-week Group Coaching Program starts soon. Check my bio or the comments section for the link to register

©️ Modupe Ehirim

25/08/2025

Marriage is more interesting when two different personality types come together; like an introvert and an extrovert. One thrives on quiet moments, the other gets energy from social connections.

At first, these differences may feel like friction, but with the right understanding, they can actually be one of your greatest strengths as a couple.

Here Are Some Of The Challenges It Comes With:

♦️The extrovert may feel their partner is “too quiet” or uninterested.

️♦️The introvert may feel overwhelmed by too much social activity.

♦️Miscommunication happens when one sees “recharging” as withdrawal, or the other sees “going out” as unnecessary pressure.

Here Are Their Uniqueness
✅ Introverts bring depth, reflection, and calm into the relationship.

✅ Extroverts bring energy, adventure, and connection.

✅ When embraced, these traits balance each other beautifully—creating a marriage that is both grounded and vibrant.

Practical Tips for Harmony

📍Respect each other’s needs: Quiet time is not rejection; social time is not neglect.

📍Create balance: Alternate between cozy nights in and fun outings.

📍Communicate openly: Share what drains or recharges you without judgment.

📍Compromise with love: Meet in the middle—sometimes step into your partner’s world, and sometimes invite them into yours.

Being an introvert or extrovert isn’t a problem in marriage—it’s an opportunity to learn, grow, and stretch together.

When you stop trying to change each other and start appreciating the balance, your marriage becomes stronger, more compassionate, and beautifully unique.

🎯 Stream 9 of the Get Yourself Ready for Marriage 12-week Group Coaching Program starts soon. Check my bio or the comments section for the link to register

©️ Modupe Ehirim

23/08/2025

MARRIAGE IS TEAMWORK. STOP TRYING TO WIN AGAINST YOUR PARTNER.

One of the biggest mistakes couples make is approaching marriage like a competition. Who’s right, who’s wrong, who sacrifices more, who wins the argument.

But here’s the truth: when you keep trying to “win” against your partner, you both lose. Marriage is not a battlefield, it’s a partnership.

In a healthy marriage, both partners are on the same side.

You’re not opponents; you’re teammates working toward the same goals—love, peace, growth, and building a life together. When one person is always trying to prove a point or dominate, it creates walls instead of bridges.

The truth is, competition in marriage leads to resentment. It turns small disagreements into full-blown wars, and instead of solving the problem, it shifts the focus to who wins. This cycle drains intimacy and makes your partner feel unheard or undervalued.

Here's How to Shift From Competing to Teamwork

✅Listen, not just respond. Seek to understand, not to outshine.

✅Choose peace over ego. Sometimes the healthiest response is compromise.

✅Celebrate each other’s wins. Your partner’s success is your success too.

✅Focus on solutions, not blame. Remember, it’s both of you versus the problem, not you versus each other.

Marriage flourishes when you stop keeping score and start building together.

Winning an argument may feel good for a moment, but building trust, unity, and love will last a lifetime.

Remember: marriage isn’t about who’s right, it’s about doing right by each other.

©️ Modupe Ehirim

22/08/2025

This single lady shared a story of a man she dated since 2023, found out 2025 that he died that same 2023😳

Please and please, if you are single or married, you need to be a part of the training by Satide Waka show counselor, Modupe Ehirim (Mrs).

Please enrol. It will open your eyes to a lot. You need to know. You need to be prepared. For singles- https://trfma.selar.com/GetYourselfReadyForMarriage

And for the married, click to join the next cohort- bit.ly/2025MPGCP … more info on the comment section..

14/08/2025

Men notice more than they say.

14/08/2025

STOP GLORIFYING STRUGGLE LOVE. YOU DESERVE PEACE, NOT JUST SURVIVAL.

Struggle love is not romantic. It’s not noble. It’s not necessary.

Too many people stay in relationships that drain them — emotionally, mentally, and even physically, because they’ve been conditioned to believe that “all relationships are hard”

Here’s the truth:
👉🏽 Love shouldn’t feel like punishment.
👉🏽 Constant drama is not a sign of passion.
👉🏽 Being loyal to someone who continually wounds you is not strength — it’s survival mode.
👉🏽 Peace, respect, and emotional safety are not luxuries — they’re essentials.

You are not obligated to prove your worth by enduring dysfunction. Love is not a test you have to keep failing and retaking just to be seen or chosen.

WHAT HEALTHY LOVE LOOKS LIKE
✅ You feel safe being vulnerable — not afraid of being blamed or ignored.
✅ Disagreements happen, but they don’t leave you emotionally destroyed.
✅ You don’t feel like you’re walking on eggshells.
✅ Your partner values your peace as much as their own.
✅ You grow together, not just survive together.

Love should nourish, not just test you.
It should feel like a soft place to land, not a warzone you constantly have to fight your way through.

Stop normalizing pain in the name of “love.”
Stop wearing long-suffering as your love language.

You don’t have to earn peace through years of struggle.
You deserve love that doesn’t leave bruises, seen or unseen.
You deserve peaceful love, not just love that survives the storm.

Don’t settle for survival.
Choose peace. Choose wholeness. Choose you.

🎯 Stream 9 of the Get Yourself Ready for Marriage 12-week Group Coaching Program starts soon. Check my bio or the comments section for the link to register

©️ Modupe Ehirim

02/08/2025

MARRIAGE CAN GET LOST IN THE MIDDLE OF MOTHERHOOD OR FATHERHOOD. HERE'S HOW TO RECONNECT.

Parenthood changes everything.

From sleepless nights to school runs, diaper changes to teenage drama, it's easy to slip into the role of Mom or Dad and forget you were lovers first.

And over time, the “marriage” part of the relationship can begin to feel like a background character.

But it doesn’t have to stay that way.

Here's How to Reconnect:

1. Reclaim Your Identity as a Couple: You’re not just co-parents. You’re partners.
Start by calling each other by your names again—not just “Mummy” or “Daddy.”
It may sound small, but this simple act rekindles the romantic identity you once had.

2. Prioritize Alone Time (Even in Small Ways): You don’t need grand vacations.
Sometimes, 20 minutes of uninterrupted conversation after the children go to bed can be more intimate than a dinner date.
Put the phones down. Look into each other’s eyes. Laugh together again.

3. Say “Thank You” More Often: Gratitude softens the heart.
Whether it’s handling bedtime, paying the bills, or folding laundry—acknowledge each other.
Validation is fuel in marriage, especially when both of you are constantly pouring out for the children.

4. Be Gentle With Each Other’s Exhaustion: You’re both tired, stretched, and trying.
Instead of comparing who’s doing more, commit to being teammates.
Ask: “How can I help lighten your load this week?”
Support isn’t always big—it’s often found in little daily gestures.

5. Revisit Your "Before Kids" Memories: Look through old photos.
Reminisce about your first date, that goofy inside joke, that time you danced in the rain.
Revisiting those moments helps you remember why you chose each other in the first place.

Motherhood and fatherhood are beautiful, sacred roles—but they shouldn’t erase your marriage.

Your children need to see love modeled, not just spoken about.

When you prioritize your connection, you’re not just investing in each other—you’re also building a stronger, more secure home for your children.

🎯 Stream 9 of the Get Yourself Ready for Marriage 12-week Group Coaching Program starts soon. Check my bio or the comments section for the link to register

©️ Modupe Ehirim

24/07/2025

WHAT TO DO WHEN YOUR SE*X DRIVES DON’T MATCH?

Mismatch in s*xual desire affects more marriages than people admit

One of you wants it often.
The other… not so much.
And suddenly, something that’s meant to bring you closer becomes a point of frustration, rejection, and misunderstanding.

You start asking questions like:
“Am I not enough?”
“Is something wrong with me?”
And before you know it, bitterness replaces desire.

Here’s the truth:
You’re not broken. Your marriage isn’t doomed. And mismatched s*x drives are more common than you think.

Here's How Couples Can Navigate Mismatched S*x Drives Without Constant Conflict?

✅ Stop Taking It Personally: Desire fluctuates for many reasons—stress, hormones, body image, or emotional disconnection.

It’s not always about you. Start with compassion towards your spouse, not assumptions.

✅ Talk About It (Without Pressure or Shame): Many couples don’t talk about se*x until it becomes a fight.

Create a safe space to say:
"I want to understand what intimacy means to you."

Not everything is solved in the bedroom—some things begin with honest, shame-free conversations.

✅ Understand Each Other’s “Why”: For one partner, se*x might be how they feel loved.
For the other, they might need to feel loved first before being open to intimacy.
Different approaches—same need for connection.

✅ Find Middle Ground: Intimacy isn’t just in*******se.
Touch, quality time, emotional bonding—these all feed desire.
When both partners feel emotionally close, physical closeness often follows.

✅ Consider Counseling: If this keeps creating emotional walls, don’t suffer in silence. Professional guidance can help both of you understand yourselves and each other better.

The truth is, your s*x life doesn’t have to be perfect to be healthy.
It just needs mutual respect, open communication, and patience.

Desire may not always match—but your willingness to work through it together is what builds real intimacy.

©️ Modupe Ehirim

09/07/2025

There will be days when it’s hard.
Days when you don’t feel in sync.
Days when everything feels off.

But hear this → A good marriage isn’t one where everything is perfect.
It’s one where both people refuse to give up.

Because love isn’t always butterflies.
Sometimes, it’s showing up tired but willing.
Sometimes, it’s choosing grace over being right.
Sometimes, it’s choosing each other again... and again... and again.

Remember, perfection isn’t the goal—commitment is.

Rooting for you

©️ .e

08/07/2025

HOW TO APOLOGIZE IN A WAY YOUR SPOUSE ACTUALLY RECEIVES

Saying “I’m sorry” isn’t always enough. Especially in marriage.

Sometimes, your spouse hears your apology, but it doesn’t land. It feels rushed, defensive, or empty. And then you're both stuck in a cycle of tension and misunderstanding.

So, how do you apologize in a way that your spouse actually receives it? Not just hears it—but feels it?

Here’s how to do it right:

1. Understand Their Apology Language: Just like love languages, people receive apologies differently.

Some need to hear the words, “I’m sorry.”
Others need to see changed behavior.
Some want an explanation, while others just want you to sit in discomfort with them for a moment.

Also, ask your spouse: What helps you feel truly heard when I apologize?

This one question can transform your communication.

2. Be Specific, Not Vague: Instead of “I’m sorry for everything,” say,
“I’m sorry for raising my voice and making you feel unsafe. That was wrong.”
Clarity builds trust. Vague apologies feel like a brush-off.

3. Drop the “But”: “I’m sorry, but you started it.”
“I’m sorry but I was stressed.”

The moment you insert “but,” you cancel the apology. Own your part without conditions. Accountability is attractive.

4. Validate Their Feelings: It’s not just about what you did—it’s about how it made them feel.

Say something like,
“I can see how that made you feel ignored. I would feel that way too.”

Validation softens the heart faster than a bouquet of flowers.

5. Follow Through with Change: Words matter, but actions matter more.
A true apology is backed by consistent behavior that says, “I’m working on this.”

Remember, apologizing well is a form of emotional maturity and love.
It’s not weakness—it’s strength.

When you apologize in a way your spouse can receive, you create safety, healing, and deeper intimacy.

So next time you offend your partner, pause and ask yourself,
“Am I apologizing to move on… or to truly reconnect?”

Coming Soon - A 12-week Group Coaching Program for Married People.

You don’t have to struggle by yourself anymore. Join other men and women who are determined to learn the skills they need to enjoy healthy marriages. If you want to be notified when the program is starting, go to bit.ly/2025MPGCP.

©️ Modupe Ehirim

26/06/2025

How Financial Stress Affects Affection and Intimacy

Money problems don’t just affect your bank account — they affect your bedroom too.

Many couples don’t realize that financial stress can quietly erode emotional closeness, affection, and intimacy.

What is FINANCIAL STRESS? Financial stress in marriage is the tension, worry or conflict that couples feel when money is tight, income is uncertain, or financial goals and spending habits don’t align.

It’s not because they don’t love each other anymore.
It’s because when survival feels like a priority, connection becomes a luxury.

Here’s How Financial Stress Shows Up in a Marriage:

1. Tension Becomes the Default Mood: When bills are piling up, one or both partners can become anxious, irritable, or withdrawn. Even small disagreements feel like big battles — and tenderness is replaced by tension.

2. Affection Takes a Backseat: It’s hard to hug, kiss, or laugh together when one partner feels like they're drowning. Physical touch becomes rare, not because love is gone, but because stress takes up all the emotional space.

3. Blame and Resentment Creep In: One partner may feel they’re doing too much. The other may feel they’re not doing enough. Over time, unspoken expectations turn into silent distance or explosive arguments.

4. Self-Worth Affects Desire: When someone feels like a financial failure, their confidence drops — and so does their desire for physical intimacy. They may pull away, not because they don’t want their partner, but because they don’t feel worthy of being wanted.

5. Communication Breaks Down: Instead of talking openly, couples may avoid conversations altogether. This silence builds walls, and those walls don’t just stay in their finances — they move into their hearts and bedroom too.

If You’re Experiencing Financial Stress In Your Marriage, Here's What You And Your PartnerCan Do About It

✅ Talk Honestly (Not Emotionally Charged): Have regular, calm conversations about your finances. Don’t hide your fears or frustrations. Transparency builds trust.

✅ Separate the Person from the Problem: Blame solves nothing. Remember, it’s both of you against the problem — not each other.

✅ Keep Touch Alive — Even When It’s Hard: Small gestures like holding hands, cuddling, or simply sitting close can remind your partner, “We’re still in this together.”

✅ Support Each Other Emotionally: A listening ear and a reassuring word go a long way. Remind your partner that their value is more than their paycheck.

✅ Seek Help If Needed: Financial coaching or therapy can make a huge difference. Sometimes having a third party helps couples create plans and restore peace.

Financial stress is real — but so is the love you share.
And while money may shake your plans, it doesn’t have to shake your bond.

Stay connected. Be kind to each other.
Don’t let today’s hardship rob you of tomorrow’s closeness.
Because couples who fight for each other — not against each other, find a way through anything.

For more about how to deal with Financial Stress in your marriage get my book, “30 Reasons Why Couples Quarrel About Money” from https://trfma.selar.com/nbop

©️ Modupe Ehirim

Address

Lagos

Opening Hours

Tuesday	09:00 - 17:00
Thursday	09:00 - 17:00

Telephone

+2348176582658

Website

http://www.rightfitmarriage.com/

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