19/08/2023
Hello Friends! Welcome to
Tips to improving your mental health
PASSIVE RELATIONSHIP AND YOUR MENTAL HEALTH
Have you ever been in a relation where you literally carried the entire weight while your partner merely follows? You initiated calls, made suggestions, begged for attention, endured excuses, etc. If YES then you were in a passive relationship.
How did you feel while the relationship lasted – hurtful, angry, suspicious, etc.?
ï‚® Passivity in a relationship means that one of the parties in the relationship leaves things to the other person. It is a really distorted way of responding to love
ï‚® It simply means your partner do not take the lead but is the constant follower.
ï‚® Passivity is an enemy of love in any relationship.
ï‚® Passivity can be one of the main causes of a breakdown in relationships.
 Passive behaviors can affect any area in the couple’s lives, emotional, economic, work, etc.
ï‚® Loving someone who is passive in love means you are already alone. It means having someone who is beside you but effectively absent, someone who does not care about you, support you or commit to you.
Love requires dynamism. Indeed love demands effort, discipline, and time. Therefore, falling in love with someone who takes you for granted and barely pays attention to you, hurts.
Passive lovers harm their partners without even lifting a finger. They hurt them due to their lack of initiative and emotional responses.
Possible causes of passivity in a relationship
- Education, cultural biases, and personal factors: For example, feminism and traditional roles. Some individuals have been used to others nurturing their needs and validating their emotions right from childhood.
- Anxious-passive attachment: Those who often become obsessed with receiving the affection of others passively, without investing in reciprocity. They understand love in a unidirectional way, aimed only at obtaining ’emotional resources’.
- Authoritarian and demanding upbringing: In this instance, the individual has been devalued for so long that, in the end, he/she has decided not to act to avoid any conflict. Due to personal insecurity, they let go and allow their partner to take responsibility for the relationship.
- Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD): People with this disorder often exhibit passive behaviors in emotional relationships. They might frequently forget many things, not finish what they started, and find it difficult to demonstrate their commitment to their partner.
- Poor management of discrepancies and conflicts: Some people with clearly childish attitudes, after series of conflicts or discrepancies in their relationship, might decide to stop acting or accept any responsibility. They may even stop talking to their partner.
- Lack of interest in the relationship: A partner who is no longer interested in the relationship and beginning to withdraw self may become passive.
- Competition and comparison with a third party: When your partner is unfaithful and measures your gestures less than what his/her other partner provides
What can you do if you have a passive partner?
If your partner is really passive, the last thing you should do is make the situation chronic by taking full responsibility. You must act and demand change.
- The first step is communication. Establish an assertive and sincere dialogue to understand what the cause of the passivity is.
- Try to understand your partner’s motive for being in the relationship in the first place (e.g. love, somebody paying for his/her bills, materialistic, etc.).
- Specifically assign some tasks to your partner to take responsibility and assist when necessary with love.
- If the reason for being passive is lack of interest, kindly let him/her go and move on for the sake of your mental stability
Always remember that NO ONE is worth draining your emotional/mental battery. There are millions of potential partners out there who will appreciate and adore your cares.
