Sandy Millar - Celebrant & End of Life Doula

22/09/2025

If you're wondering what to do with you wedding dress after the event, here are a few ideas:

A perfect wedding gown is a priority for most, if not all, brides. From dress shopping to getting multiple alterations, the process of finding the right dress

21/09/2025

People often say to me, "I don't want a funeral." But there are plenty of reasons to have one, especially for those who are left to grieve. And it can be as simple or sophisticated as you like, and customised to reflect your interests, values and beliefs. Choose a time and place that's meaningful for you, or use the facilities offered by funeral services across Aotearoa (see link). Why have a funeral? https://share.google/fGNaWSXH8sFftDXEl

15/09/2025

When my grandad died 34 years ago, he was buried on a hillside next to a young boy who had been murdered in his own home. At the time, I wondered if his storytelling skills about boats and the sea would be put to good use. But I also wondered if it was what my grandfather wanted - after all, his wife was buried nearly three hours away in another city. If he'd had an Advance Care Plan, maybe this wouldn't have happened. Don't assume that your family or whanau will know what you want when you're at the end of your life. Have the conversation now, and leave no doubt. Instructions and forms are readily available here in Aotearoa - contact me or one of my doula colleagues for more information, or head to www.myacp.org.nz

03/09/2025

Great to hear from Jane Goodwin about ACP - Advance Care Plans - and why they are so important for us here in Aotearoa, even when you're fit and healthy. Grab your copy online or from your health provider or doula.

02/09/2025

It's Dying Matters Week, and the fabulous Treza Gallogly, our ELDAA chair and all round good woman, talks to Kathryn Ryan on RNZ this morning at 11:20am. Listen in to learn about end of life doulas like me, who are making a difference to people and their whanau before, during, and after death. #

28/08/2025

It's Dying Matters Week next week, but if you can't get to one of the in-person events, how about attending an online event? Check out what's on offer, including our very own Belinda Price with her Dying to Know podcast. https://gowithgrace.nz/dyingmatters/online-events/

27/08/2025

Grief doesn't have a timeline, it's not linear or predictable. Grief is as individual as you are. Deep love leads to deep grief. Be kind to yourself 🙏

25/08/2025

There's lots going on in September during Dying Matters Week here in Tamaki Makaurau. Join one or more of the events in your local library.

The team from Honohono Tātou Katoa are bringing Dying Matters Week back to Auckland in 2025. This event is all about connecting people across Aotearoa to start conversations in a safe space, learn from local experts and seek support to get affairs in order and navigate grief or loss.

21/08/2025

Thinking about the future? Maybe it's time you wrote your Advance Care Plan.

21/08/2025

Wise words from Dr Kathryn Mannix. Hope shifts as we begin the transition from living 🙏

Hope is an essential companion in life, and realistic hope relies on access to honest information about our life circumstances.

Throughout our lives, we adjust our hopes in response to our life circumstances. My palliative care patients have shown me how realistic hope adjusts and flexes as their health changes. To begin with, sick people hope for cure; when cure is no longer possible, they hope for remission, for symptom management, for memory-building with their dearest people.

Beyond those hopes, people continue hoping: to live comfortably, to die peacefully, to leave a legacy of good memories (and maybe some tangible gifts), for their beloveds' flourishing in their future lives.

Telling the truth doesn't make people hope-less. It allows them to adjust their hopes and stay the course.

The truth, unwelcome though it may be, can be told with kindness and compassion. Breaking unwelcome news is a skill that can be learned and practised. Withholding the truth is not a kindness, it is an abdication of caring.



What do you think?

16/08/2025

A beautiful, gentle and informative clip from the incredible Dr Kathryn Mannix. Worth a watch with your cuppa on a Sunday morning

In modern British society, death is out of sight and behind closed doors. Many of us lack direct exposure to the dying process - with all sorts of potential ...