death WORKS NZ

09/05/2026

A poem by Donna Ashworth titled: MOTHER’S DAY WITHOUT HER, says, “Do all the things you know she loved on earth. For her.”

My mother was a dressmaker, and she has a natural flair for crafts and creativity. She loved her beautiful clothes; she was always fabulously dressed in her own unique sense of style.

She loved her trips into town for shopping, and she was also a prolific op-shopper, always able to spot a bargain! But more than clothes, she loved nothing like celebrating and a good party!
Costumes were one of her great passions, and at one stage, she had an entire wardrobe dedicated to outfits for plays and parties.

In our family, most special events became the reason for another fancy dress, and because for her, life was something worth celebrating, even her funeral guests came in full costume, truly capturing her true essence.

05/05/2026

Reclaiming Dying

03/05/2026

May the 4th be with you ✨

02/05/2026

I loved reading this post, and seeing how our neighbours across the ditch are embracing other cultural traditions.

𝗞𝗢𝗧𝗦𝗨𝗔𝗚𝗘 ‘𝗕𝗼𝗻𝗲-𝗣𝗶𝗰𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗴’ 𝗖𝗲𝗿𝗲𝗺𝗼𝗻𝘆 ⁣
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We recently assisted a Japanese family to have a version of the traditional Japanese Kotsuage ceremony, and we were struck by the immediacy and deeply moving reality of this experience.⁣
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Although it wasn’t possible to have exactly the same rendering of the ceremony as in Japan - our cremators are very different and here less full bones are left; they also come out more jumbled up due to the machines - even so, we worked closely with the team at GMCT to try and meet the wishes of the family to find the hyoid bone - which is very precious because it’s the bone that is linked to a person’s voice and speech.⁣
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This process of sorting bones and gathering some up to be kept is both beautiful and wrenching. Through this act we really understand what ‘ashes’ are. We must confront the depth of loss and also that we are here with the relics of our person.⁣
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It made us think that perhaps this ceremony is not cultural so much as it could be universal. It is a deeply human experience.⁣
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So we would like you to know we can offer this to you should you need or want this, and can tailor it to what feels right.⁣
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As Kimba is also deeply connected to Japanese culture and language, we are soon going to have an offering for Japanese families beginning with a page explaining our offerings in Japanese. Kimba can also offer small sections of ceremony in Japanese and we have a livestream service with Japanese subtitling.⁣
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lasthurrah 骨上げ⁣
葬儀⁣
メルボルン

27/04/2026

Maybe death is easier to accept when we are ready for it. ⚰️

24/04/2026

I was delighted some of our poppies were still growing, beautifully timed for the Rongotea ANZAC Remembrance Service.

Poppies represent the blood-soaked battlefields of World War I, where poppies were the first flowers to grow in the ravaged soil of Flanders, in France.

Lest we Forget.

24/04/2026

The tōtara tree holds deep significance in Aotearoa, often serving as a living memorial to soldiers and embodying the concept of strength and leadership.

Kua hinga te tōtara i te wao nui a Tāne.

Lest We Forget.

Mangatera Cemetery, Dannevirke

19/04/2026

A positive funeral discussion for one of my followers.
Thank you for sharing your experience and sending your feedback! 🙏

18/04/2026

When you've sat at a bedside as someone is dying, the moments that follow their death, we simply can't get back - so try not to rush, sit, or put on the jug if you want, and importantly be present.

The first thing to do when someone dies is: nothing.

I know that might feel strange. Your mind may tell you to do something, call someone, or fix something. That desire comes from love, but it also comes from modern Western culture not teaching us how to simply be with death.

If you’ve ever been at the bedside of a dying person, you’ll know that there’s a grace to being with someone you love as they make their transition out of this world. It’s a precious time.

What that moment calls for is presence, quiet, and time to let the truth of it land, for you and for them.

Think of it this way, they are a newborn in the next world. Hold that space with that kind of energy. Put the kettle on, sit with their body, and let yourself adjust to the reality that they are gone.

If you’d like to learn more about how to be with death, comment “DOWNLOAD” to receive my free E-Book: The Principles of Sacred Deathcare.

17/04/2026

Would you be happy if you died tomorrow?

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