Psychotherapy Vienna- Mag. Elena Padurariu

11/09/2025

The Art of drawing a line: protecting your time and energy in remote work

We often talk about “drawing a line” between work and life.
But in remote work, that line it's not clearly drawn for us—we need to create it ourselves.
Without the physical separation of leaving an office, work can quietly spill into evenings, weekends, and even family time. Add in a big project or a pressing deadline, and suddenly every day feels like one long workday.

Although we may all, from time to time, need to work extra hours, making this a regular occurrence can increase our chances of burning out.

The reality is:
We can’t just press a button to “turn off work", although we wish we could.
But we can create rituals that signal the transition from work to life.

To stop the spillover effects of work, we need to consider all three levels: physical, mental, and emotional.

Physical
- If you can, set up a separate office space and leave your laptop/phone in there at the end of the day.
- If space is limited, even just putting work tools out of sight makes a difference.
- A walk, bike ride, or quick trip outside creates a boundary. (My dog makes sure I never skip this step 🐾).
- Changing the work outfit to a comfy one can help signal that we have entered the relaxation zone.

Mental
- Write down tasks, notes, or ideas for tomorrow before logging off. This will make the beginning of the next workday easier.
- Declutter your mind from everything you don’t need to think about until the next work day.

Emotional
- Keep work conversations (especially those loaded with negative emotions) at home to a minimum. Venting helps occasionally, but constant talk about work problems keeps you stuck in it.
- Journaling can be a healthier outlet for processing stress.
- Learn to celebrate small successes, as this will bring positive energy.
- And most importantly—do what brings you joy outside work: play with your kids, cook, listen to music, or read.

The takeaway:
Remote work gives us freedom, but also blurs the line between work and life. The more conscious we are of the spillover effect, the more intentional we must be in creating rituals that protect our time, energy, and joy.
WorkLifeBalance

26/08/2025

⏰ Burnout prevention starts in the morning: The power of a Wind-Up routine

Just as every piece of music begins with a note that sets the tone, every day starts with choices that influence our experience.

Our routines have a bigger impact on our energy and well-being than we often realize. Research shows that consistent routines help us better cope with anxiety and stress, and this matters for burnout prevention.
Think about the difference between:
- Starting your day in a rush, already feeling behind
vs.
- Starting your day with even a few minutes for yourself, grounded and intentional about what you are about to do.
The contrast is huge.

A morning “wind-up” routine sets the rhythm for your whole day.
It doesn’t need to take an hour. Even five minutes can change your emotional state, boost focus, and help you feel more in control.

Most importantly, it’s about giving to yourself before giving to anyone else. And this counts for the relationship to yourself.

Thinking back at my own practice, I’ll admit, in the beginning, it was hard to set time aside. With small children, mornings felt rushed and unpredictable. But as my responsibilities grew, so did the need to care for my own energy, focus, and mental clarity.
I started small — just 10 minutes of breathwork or meditation. Over time, it grew into a one-hour morning ritual that prepares both my mind and body for the day.
And I’ve noticed something important: the more stress I have, the more this routine counts for my well-being.

💡 Ideas for a Wind-Up routine:
Everyone’s routine will look different. For some, it may be:
- Preparing a plan for the day
- Meditation or breathwork
- Jogging or stretching
- A mindful coffee or tea ritual
- Simply sitting quietly and envisioning the day to come.
The key is to experiment, notice what gives you the biggest return in energy, and then keep showing up for yourself.

Main takeaway?
Burnout prevention starts in these small daily choices. The way we start is often the way we continue.
🤔 What’s one small morning habit that helps you feel grounded and energized?
And if you don’t have one yet — what’s something you’d like to try?

18/08/2025

What if burnout isn't just about work? What if it's about self-esteem?

In therapy, I rarely see burnout as the simple result of too many tasks given by the manager.
Instead, I see people who:
Can’t trust themselves to set boundaries
Strive for perfection, punishing themselves when they fall short
Rely on external validation to feel worthy

That made me ask myself:
What if burnout is less about how much we do, and more about how we measure our worth?
In my latest blog, I wrote about the strong connection between burnout and self-esteem. I am curious if this relates to you, too.
You can read the full article here and give your comment: https://www.padurariu.at/post/what-if-burnout-isn-t-just-about-work-what-if-it-s-about-self-esteem

As a therapist, I rarely see burnout as a simple result of an increasing workload.That’s a one-sided perspective that leaves out the power of the person experiencing it. As if we have no agency in how much we take on.In my work, I meet people who: • Don’t trust themselves to set boundaries aro...

04/08/2025

What is the first step in fighting burnout?

Consistent stress awareness!
A daily record of stressors can serve as a valuable tool in learning to cope with stress.
It helps us:
Identify the main stressors we have in our daily life.
We learn about our typical reactions to stress.
Develop a plan for reducing stress, both short-term and long-term.

But let’s be honest: When you're already overwhelmed with work, family, deadlines, and responsibilities, keeping a log might feel like “just another task.”
Yet the time you invest in tuning in to yourself is far less than the time you'll spend recovering if you continue to ignore the signs your body is giving you.

To improve our stress awareness, we can start with four small but powerful steps:
1. Schedule emotional check-ins with yourself.
Pause at least 2–3 times a day—morning, midday, and evening—and ask:
• How am I feeling emotionally?
• What’s happening in my body?
• What kind of thoughts am I having?

2. Connect emotions to context.
Are you anxious before a meeting? Frustrated with a colleague? Depleted from poor sleep?
Understanding the why helps reduce overwhelm and gives you the information for what you might need. Rest? Say no to a new project? Delegate?

3. Choose a small rebalancing action.
It could be a deep breath, a body stretch, a short break, or something more strategic, like setting a boundary or asking for support.
Small resets help now. Bigger changes help in the long run.

4. Spot the patterns.
Over time, your check-ins will reveal common “hot spots.”
Who or what drains your energy?
What can you change, or how can you respond differently?

In time, as you become more aware of your stressors, you will learn to deal with them more effectively, increasing the sense of control over your well-being.

What’s one small way you’re checking in with yourself today?

16/07/2025

Are you feeling overwhelmed by just going through the day? Like a fish in water, we often don't notice our own stress. Dive into my latest blog to learn how to identify and approach burnout. Read more: https://www.padurariu.at/post/are-you-a-fish-in-water-how-to-think-about-burnout

A fish doesn’t know it’s in water because water is its normal environment. In the same way, people under chronic stress often don’t realize they’re stressed. The stress becomes their “normal.”Until being generally tired and stressed turns into exhaustion that is overwhelming. People star...

23/06/2025

In every relationship, it's normal to go through ups and downs. However, after a while, we get caught up in what bothers us rather than cherishing what we love.
Check out my latest blog on recognizing the positives in our partners and enhancing our relationships:

The more I work with couples, the more I notice a similar pattern.At the beginning of a relationship, we often see our partner’s best qualities: their planning skills, their generosity, or maybe their willingness to help others. But over time, especially under stress or during conflict, we begin t...

22/05/2025

Forgiveness is often perceived as a gift we extend to others, but in truth, it’s a powerful gift we give ourselves.

In my work as a couples therapist, I’ve seen how important forgiveness is in helping individuals and relationships move forward. When past hurts are left unresolved, they can quietly weaken connection, trust, and emotional safety.

One of the most important signs of emotional growth is the ability to turn resentment, blame, or bitterness into something more constructive and healing. Forgiveness doesn't mean forgetting or pretending it didn’t hurt. It means remembering with wisdom, making peace with the pain, and choosing to release its influence on your present.

In couples therapy, forgiveness is part of the process of repairing the relationship. It means no longer demanding punishment or repeatedly bringing up the past. And it doesn’t happen overnight. It's a process that takes time and that involves:

Self-reflection – acknowledging the emotional toll of holding onto the grudge.
Seeking understanding – exploring why the hurt occurred.
Expressing the hurt – naming feelings like sadness, anger, or disappointment.
Rebuilding trust – through sincere apologies and acts of reassurance.
Letting go – releasing the pain, and the power it holds.

Forgiveness doesn’t mean the person who caused harm must stay in your life—it means you’ve made peace with the experience and chosen not to carry it into your future.

Letting go is hard and each of us has our own pace. But it’s also one of the most liberating steps we can take—for ourselves and our relationships.

22/03/2025

You don't need lots of money to offer yourself moments of luxury. You just need to seek these moments.☺️

19/03/2025

When Expectations Clash: Role Conflicts in Relationships & Work

As a therapist, I often see how conflicting expectations create tension—whether in romantic relationships or the workplace. We all step into roles with assumptions about what we and others “should” do. But when these expectations aren’t clearly communicated, misunderstandings, frustration, and resentment can build.

Last weekend, at a conflict management seminar, I reflected on how many of the conflicts I see in my clients stem not from bad intentions, but from differing, unspoken, or unclear expectations.

In relationships, partners struggle with:

Who manages finances?
How much time should be spent with extended family?
How do we balance personal time and family time?
How do we divide household responsibilities?

At work, employees often feel:

Expected to take on more than their role describes.
Unclear on priorities, leading to stress.
Frustrated by a lack of control over their tasks.

The biggest takeaway from last weekend?
Most conflicts aren’t about personality differences—they’re about misaligned expectations.

The solution? Clarity, communication, and mutual understanding. The more we talk openly about our expectations, the less likely we are to feel frustrated, taken for granted, or misunderstood.
But before we step into a conversation with our partner or manager, we have to take time to reflect on what our expectations are for the roles we have? What we can offer, what not?

14/03/2025

There are times to think, times to do things. And there are times to just breath and catch up with yourself. Because you deserve it! ☺️

12/03/2025

What’s in Your Stress Management Toolkit?

Stress hits all of us—sometimes when we least expect it. And when it does, we often struggle to figure out how to cope.
But ideally, we should have a "toolkit" ready before stress becomes overwhelming.

Here are some tools I keep in my own stress management kit:
✔️ I stick to my sleep routine and exercise regularly.
✔️ I identify the biggest source of stress and get clear on what's in my control — and what's not.
✔️ I take action on the things I can control.
✔️ I keep doing those little things that make me happy, even if I don't always feel like.

And most importantly? I stop complaining about how hard life is — and instead take small steps to move forward.
Because any small step toward reducing stress is better than doing nothing.

Take some time to reflect. Maybe for you, that small step is:

🌿 Learning to give yourself time to relax instead of letting your work follow you at home and in your bed
💬 Speaking up and asserting yourself when you feel frustrated
💖 Managing anxious thoughts. Anxieties are helpful only up to a certain degree
🥗 Balancing healthy life style habits. Those habits are there to support you all the time, not only in times of calm.
Whatever it is—just don't stay stuck. Progress is progress, even if it's tiny.

What I hear from most of the people I work with, is that with the increase of stress, there is a decrease in all those activities that are usually helping in balancing their mental health.

My advice is the opposite, the greater the stress, the more you need to make time for your coping tools.

06/03/2025

For those searching for a helpful resource about adult ADHD, I found this:

Adult ADHD information, strategies and tools for thriving while living, working, parenting and relationships from ADHD expert, Marcy Caldwell