Wise Path Birthing Services, LLC

I am a seasoned birth doula, labor professional, Bradley Method® childbirth educator, and reiki practitioner in northern Virginia.

I specialize in Childbirth education, Bradley Method® classes, Labor support, and Birth doula services in northern Virginia and the surrounding areas.

birthtraumatruths.wordpress.com

The Pitfalls of ‘Going With The Flow’ in Birth

A little lengthy, but it really goes through a common scenario in our birth culture. Good read!

birthtraumatruths.wordpress.com So many of us aim to ‘just go with the flow’ as our birthplan. But could the gentle flow of birth we envisage actually be undermined with this approach? Could ‘going with the flow’ even be detrimen…

That is all.

What wonderful words! She puts a spin on common birth thinking that had never occurred to me before.

YOU SHOULD TRUST YOUR DOCTOR/MIDWIFE 👩🏽‍⚕️👨🏻‍⚕️

“I was stupid…” “I thought I could trust her…” “I mean, I deserved it because I didn’t know better…” “We just didn’t know…”

When I meet a writer, I will usually share with them that I wrote a fantasy novel many years ago.

When I meet a skydiver, I will share with them that I was once a licensed jumper and we will swap stories of being in the air.

And when people find out that I’m a midwife, they usually share their birth stories.
They know I “get it” – I know the right times to congratulate them, and the appropriate time for my jaw to drop because of a scary moment or fist pump their triumph with them. It’s validating to be heard and understood, and they know that I both hear them and also understand their story in a way that many can’t.

Through their stories, however, so many times I hear the statements that I used to open this blog post. “So I was induced and found out it was because of (some non-medical reason)…I just did what they told me to do. I was stupid….”

• “My doctor told me that if we didn’t have a c-section that my baby would die from shoulder dystocia so we scheduled a c-section – I didn’t know it was because he was going on vacation.”
• “My midwife told me that if I didn’t get an epidural now that they couldn’t be sure I could get one later if I changed my mind and it would probably help me dilate since I was a first time mom….I thought I could trust her so I got one.”
• “My doctor told me that if I walked 3 miles every day my birth would be easy. I walked 3 miles every day but then once I went into labor I was contracting for six hours and she still wasn’t out so they gave me a c-section. We just didn’t know….”
• “Oh I had everything for my birth! Induced, epidural, episiotomy…it was horrible! Worth it because he’s here now, but it was horrible! I mean, I deserved it because I didn’t even take a childbirth class so I didn’t know better….but man, that was awful.”

These are all real statements that I’ve heard – and trust me, these are just samplers from a much much larger menu over the last 24 years. I am not about to “Monday morning quarterback” these very valid experiences – I wasn’t there, I don’t know what was actually said or what actually happened. I have heard my OWN clients tell their birth stories in which I’m screaming in my own head, “Umm….that’s not what happened…” but it doesn’t actually matter what happened. When it comes to our memories, what really happened doesn’t matter, the only thing that matters is what you think happened and how it made you feel. If you BELIEVE that someone wronged you, it actually doesn’t matter if they did or not – it feels the same to you because you believe it. Whether that woman was induced because her doctor was going on vacation or because she had a real medical concern is actually irrelevant to this blog post – she FELT like it was medically unnecessary and so for her the trauma of having that happen is real. I am not here to debate the validity of those birth choices – I’m here to discuss this blog posts opening statements.

The idea that women need to educate themselves to protect themselves from bad birthing choices and to protect themselves from their health care providers breaks my heart. You SHOULD trust your health care provider – and if you find that the trust has been betrayed, then that is US failing YOU! Your doctor/midwife is there to protect, to serve, to help and to be trustworthy. Trusting the wrong person doesn’t make you stupid, it makes them the wrong person.

As a midwife, I want my clients to trust me and I work really really hard to gain their trust. I always try to put their needs first, to hear them, to help in ANY way that I can – but most importantly, to respect them. I hope that there hasn’t been a single family that has hired me that has walked away thinking that I was making decisions for ME rather than doing what was in their best interest. I’m not perfect, I make mistakes, but I’m always trying my best to be the safest and most respectful midwife I can be. I try to be trust-WORTHY. As I think that every doctor, midwife, nurse, and hospital should strive to be. You weren’t stupid for trusting us, we let you down.
It is a relationship like any other in our lives. To have a care provider betray that trust is like having a partner that cheats on you. You believed in them, you trusted them to put you first, you thought they had your best interest at heart, and then you found out that they betrayed that trust. Were you stupid for marrying them? Heck no! You were an undying romantic that thought you’d have the sunset with the happily ever after! THEY were jerk-faces for betraying your trust, and nothing you could have possibly done to them deserves that. They might have their “reasons”….but that doesn’t make it right and it doesn’t make it your fault. We have to own our actions – and we all have to be held accountable for our actions.

You shouldn’t have to take a class, you shouldn’t have to hire a doula to protect you, you shouldn’t have to avoid, protect, prepare to say no…..

You should trust your care provider – and they should be trust worthy.
You should educate yourself so that you feel good and less fearful of what’s to come as well as to help you making non-medical decisions (which most decisions in birth are! They are non-medical decisions!).
You should hire a doula because they are AWESOME and you can’t have too much love and support during your birthing time.
You should know without a doubt that your care provider is on your side, you are a team and that whatever happens you will be respected.
You should know that we are all on your team and that everything we do is only to help you.

And if we fail you, please know that it is on us. And I am sorry.
#nurturingheartsbirthservices #vitamutari #mesamidwife #mesaaz #midwifery #obstetrics #laboranddelivery #careprovider #birth #doula #pregnancy #postpartum #support #nurse #homebirth #hospitalbirth #birthcenter #healthcare #informedconsent #trust #support #womenshealth

Drugs and Lactation Database (LactMed)

Questions about a drug you've been prescribed postpartum? Along with a conversation with your provider, here is a resource that may tell you more. https://toxnet.nlm.nih.gov/newtoxnet/lactmed.htm

toxnet.nlm.nih.gov Toxicology, environmental health, and chemical databases and other information resources from the Toxicology and Environmental Health Information Program, National Library of Medicine, National Institutes of Health

[10/20/18]   haveyouhadthatbabyyet.com

I had intrusive thoughts, just like this. If it happens to you, you're not a bad parent. But talk to someone about it. Don't suffer in silence.

Intrusive or scary thoughts are thoughts that sneak into our mind. They can be incredibly scary and feel real. They can cause us to be anxious and afraid to be alone with our babies.

Intrusive thoughts, are just that, thoughts. Just because you think something does not mean it will happen, and it does not make you a bad mom.

A lot of new moms experience intrusive thoughts, and it is just another secret that we are often so afraid to speak.

If you are struggling with intrusive thoughts please reach out to a professional trained in perinatal mental health. They can help you start to make sense of these thoughts, and take steps towards wellness.

We know our minds can be a scary place to be, and dear mama we don’t want you to ever feel like you are going through this alone.

www.postpartum.net is a great place to start when looking for a professional in your area who can help you navigate postpartum.

healthline.com

Vernix Caseosa: Benefits for Baby

healthline.com The vernix caseosa is a protective layer on your newborn’s skin. Here are the benefits during pregnancy and delivery.

Wildlife Ambassadors

Wildlife Ambassadors provides education programs featuring non releasable wildlife and displaced exotics . By giving us insight into their lives and habitats, they create a human-wildlife bond, nurturing future conservationists.

eventbrite.com

Celebrating International Midwives' Day ~ screening of Why Not Home?

Why NOT home...? We are so blessed by all the birth options we have here in northern Virginia!

eventbrite.com Why Not Home? is a thoughtful documentary about families who choose to birth their babies at home. Surprisingly, these families are doctors and nurses. The film's director and producer, Jessicca Moore, is a Family Nurse Practitioner. She describes herself as "not a particularly radical person," but....

Devon Roe Photography

Join me at this amazing event! If you are planning/trying to conceive, are currently expecting or recently had a baby, this event is for you! RSVP info on the flier!
I will have a table, raffle (or two!💕), and some extra specials just for stopping by! You won’t want to miss this!

DevonRoePhotography.com
#devonroephotography #loveyourbabyday #belovedyogasanctuary #prenatal #pregnancy #postnatal #birth #doula #midwife #birthcenter #health #wellness #yoga #yogateacher #prenatalyoga #momlife #dadlife #momtobe #mommytobe #empower #empoweredbirth #inspiredpregnancy #baby #newborn #newbornphotography #maternity #novaphotographer #dcphotographer #northernvirginiaphotographer #dmvphotographer

[04/29/18]   🤣🤣🤣 A word of truth!

m.news24.com

Mavis to the rescue: 'SAA air hostess personified Ubuntu when she tied crying baby to her back'

What a sweet story about the power of love and team effort!

m.news24.com When Kate Whalley-Hands struggled to put baby Imogen to sleep during a 15 hour flight from New York to South Africa, SAA air hostess Mavis Xotongo came to the rescue.

leesburg.macaronikid.com

Day out with Thomas @ B&O Railroad Museum, Baltimore (4/27-29) | Macaroni Kid

Well, who doesn't love a day with Thomas?!?

leesburg.macaronikid.com Thomas the Tank Engine returns to the B&O Railroad Museum in Baltimore! Take a 25 minute train ride behind Thomas the Tank Engine, meet Sir Topham Hatt, and enjoy a full day of live entertainment

npr.org

Redesigning Maternal Care: OB-GYNs Are Urged to See New Mothers Sooner And More Often

npr.org Sweeping changes in medical practice could improve the dismal U.S. rate of maternal deaths and near-deaths, an influential doctors group says.

leesburg.macaronikid.com

Summer Fun Activities to Plan For Now | Macaroni Kid

Did you know fourth graders can get a FREE pass to national parks??? We did this last year, when my younger was in the fourth grade, and the park we went to waived the $10 parking fee at the Harper's Ferry lot! This is an awesome deal-do take advantage of it.

leesburg.macaronikid.com Summer is right around the corner and the lazy days without a schedule and alarm clocks are simply bliss. But as parents we know some planned activities are necessary to maximize summer fun and,

Impact of delivery type on female sexual function explored

There’s a belief out there that vaginal delivery can be harmful to the “sexy time” moments, leading some of us to choose Cesarean delivery. Here is some new evidence on that to help inform us.

contemporaryobgyn.modernmedicine.com In primiparas, route of delivery does not have a long-term effect on female sexual dysfunction, according to Iranian research published in Electronic Physician. This is contrary to popular belief am

Creative Child Magazine

100% accurate!

via Smart is the New Sexy

Dancing For Birth

Are Your Hips Too Small For Birthing?

Find out in our latest blog post, video and free infographic: http://dancingforbirth.com/are-your-hips-too-small-for-birthing/

leesburg.macaronikid.com

St. Patrick's Day Fun in Loudoun | Macaroni Kid

Found an article with some St. Patty's ideas for you and the family!

leesburg.macaronikid.com Celebrate all things green, Irish, and lucky at these family friendly St. Patrick's Day events happening around Loudoun.  🍀3/10 Cooking with Kids 'Eat a Rainbow for St. Patrick's Day' @

Bad Parenting Presents

I figure this is the new staple video....every birth educator ought to have something like this on their page, don’t you agree? Explains it so well!

I have five kids, three of whom I birthed from my own body, so I thought I pretty much knew how childbirth happens.

OMG WAS I EVER WRONG.

This is the coolest demo I've ever seen explaining how labor works—I just wish I'd seen it *before* my babies were born!

Big thanks to Liz Chalmers, co-owner of Puget Sound Birth Center Kirkland, WA and Puget Sound Birth Center Renton, WA! For more info check out birthcenter.com

leesburg.macaronikid.com

Spring Consignment Sales in Loudoun | Macaroni Kid

The latest consignment sales!

leesburg.macaronikid.com Loudoun Fairfax Moms of Multiples Club Consignment Sale   Saturday, March 10, 2018 Where: Ashburn Elementary School 44062 Fincastle Dr, Ashburn, VA 20147 When: 9:00 AM - 12:00 PM

balancedbirthsupport.com

Natural Ways To Beat Cold & Flu Symptoms While Pregnant - Balanced Birth Support

Good article on some time-tested, “Grandma” remedies for the season.

balancedbirthsupport.com Author: Renee Corbino Renee keeps Balanced Birth Support organized and amazing as the Administrative Manager. She lives in Northern Virginia with her awesome fire fighting husband and two cute little boys. She is a breech birthing mama and supporter of empowering births.

livingsocial.com

PAW Patrol Live!: The Great Pirate Adventure (February 2–4)

Paw Patrol is so popular right now- I see it all over the schools! For those older sibs....😻

livingsocial.com Based on the animated TV series, PAW Patrol Live! brings everyone’s favorite pups to the stage for an action-packed musical adventure

wusa9.com

Check out Village at Leesburg's Winter Ice Festival January 13th

Neat, I hope to walk me kids around this one! Sounds like a good family time.

wusa9.com A local winter wonderland

youtube.com

Whose Line is it Anyway - Placenta

Now that's what it's all about!!!

The new Hit song from kiss

mamanatural.com

10 All-Natural Art Activities for Kids | Mama Natural

What a perfectly timely blog post for those of us who are stuck indoors on a cold, windy Snow Day! Tell me which one you try with the kiddos!

mamanatural.com Next time you're looking for indoor fun, try these 10 natural art activities that are safe and flexible for kids of all ages.

From The Start, Postpartum Doula

A new local resource to keep us learning about our growing families, and how we can get support out there! Check it out, and let me know your thoughts!

Supporting, educating and empowering growing families from the time the newborn(s) arrives continuing throughout the fourth trimester. I provide in-home care for newborns, mothers, partners and siblings to help with the transitions to life with a newborn.

mindfulreturn.com

Home

We study birth. We research our birth team, birth location, birth this and that. but what about AFTER baby? Here is a resource to check out. If you do, share with us what you think!

mindfulreturn.com Planning your maternity leave and return? You’ve come to the right place. Mindful Return is here to help guide you through your pregnancy, maternity leave, and return-to-work journey. Through the blog and e-course, you’ll find resources that will help you feel more informed, prepared, and calm a...

leesburg.macaronikid.com

Guys, I use Instacart myself! The time savings has been HUGE, and the extra fees are swallowed up in less wear and tear on my car, gas I'm not paying for to get there...plus those awful frosted cookies I'm now not buying, because I'm not having to walk past them nearly as often. Not to mention the savings on my waistline... In other words, TOTALLY worth it! Here you can read Macaroni Kid's review of Instacart.

leesburg.macaronikid.com

npr.org

Nearly Dying In Childbirth: Why Preventable Complications Are Growing In U.S.

A scary truth, and a reason for education and self-advocacy in pregnancy and birth. Here is a chance to have a conversation. What are your thoughts? How can we help this situation?

npr.org The rate of life-threatening complications for new mothers in the U.S. has more than doubled in two decades as a result of pre-existing conditions, medical errors and unequal access to care.

Love Wide Open

It's not your job to fix people. Just love them.

balancedbirthsupport.com

How To Survive The Holidays With a Newborn - Balanced Birth Support

Sensible, simple....a good little reminder at this busy time of year!

balancedbirthsupport.com Author: Renee Corbino Renee keeps Balanced Birth Support organized and amazing as the Administrative Manager. She lives in Northern Virginia with her awesome fire fighting husband and two cute little boys. She is a breech birthing mama and supporter of empowering births.

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P.O. Box 724
Ashburn, VA
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