The Secure Relationship

09/25/2025

Here are three ways to help your anxious partner feel more secure:
1. Do What You Say You're Going to Do
2. Validate. Validate. Validate.
3. Talk About Your Feelings

09/25/2025

Secure attachment doesn’t just happen—it’s created moment by moment, through emotional safety, self-awareness, and commitment. Here are 8 hopeful and practical ways to build a stronger, more connected relationship.

Discover 8 powerful ways to build secure attachment in your relationship. Learn how small shifts in perspective, empathy, and responsibility can create lasting emotional safety.

09/24/2025

Avoidant attachment isn’t about not needing closeness—it’s about fearing failure, shame, or loss of self when things get too close. In this 3-hour workshop, Julie Menanno (LMFT, LCPC, author of Secure Love, and host of The Secure Love Podcast) will guide you through the core dynamics of avoidant attachment. Together we’ll explore:

-The fears and coping strategies behind avoidant attachment
-How avoidant and anxious partners both struggle with emotional needs and closeness
-Why emotional loneliness often goes unnoticed in avoidant attachment
-Practical exercises for both avoidant partners and their loved ones to increase understanding, compassion, and connection

This workshop brings attachment theory to life with relatable examples, reflective exercises, and clear pathways toward building secure connections with yourself and your partner.

Recording will be made available to all who register.

Avoidant attachment isn’t about not needing closeness—it’s about fearing failure, shame, or loss of self when things get too close. In this 3-hour workshop, Julie Menanno (LMFT, LCPC, author of Secure Love , and host of The Secure Love Podcast ) will guide you through the core dynamics of avoi...

09/23/2025

https://www.thesecurerelationship.com/the-secure-love-podcast/session-4-why-does-leaving-feel-better-than-staying

What happens when the fear of being hurt makes leaving feel safer than staying? This week, we dive deep into Brian and Bethany’s journey as Brian shares a distressing dream and a painful childhood memory that reveal the roots of his mistrust and his instinct to detach when he feels trapped.

09/23/2025

Follow up from yesterday with practical guidelines. ❤️

*xrelationships

09/22/2025

https://www.thesecurerelationship.com/relationship-tips/the-baddy-club

Join Terra Newell and Julie Menanno as they delve into the transformative power of self-work and emotional regulation in this episode of The Baddy Club.

09/22/2025

Studies show that general well-being is associated with having s*x once per week. When couples increased their s*xual frequency from none to once per week, they experienced overall relationship improvement.

09/22/2025

I hope this makes the distinction clear. Have you experienced positive relationship results from doing self-work? Have you found self-work to be easier when your relationship is feeling secure. Please share your experiences in comments….❤️

09/21/2025

It’s easy to overlook the fact that a response to unhealthy behavior can be just as damaging to a relationship as the original behavior. Behaviors that don’t work are behaviors that don’t work, regardless of where they fall in the sequence of an interaction or event. When you respond with healthy assertion or vulnerability, or not at all for the time being, it puts the original partner in a better position to self-reflect on their own behavior, which makes their own growth more likely. Guarantees? No. No relationship advice comes with a guarantee, but shifting your response is still the healthy thing to do, not just for your relationship, but for your own emotional maturity.

09/20/2025

Did anyone ever teach you how to sit with your feelings before reacting? If not, what did you have to learn to do with your feelings? Please share in comments. ❤️

09/18/2025

Together we can build strong connections with yourself and with your partner ❤️

Register today for my Understanding Avoidant Attachment workshop

09/16/2025

https://www.thesecurerelationship.com/the-secure-love-podcast/session-3-when-you-get-scared-i-get-scared

What happens when a real-life crisis puts your relationship’s progress to the ultimate test?