11/23/2023
When I lie down to sleep, and when I hold my children close, my thoughts go to those who cannot.
How do we come back from this? I know that hope is a muscle, and I try to strengthen it, but I don't know how we can heal the harm that has been done.
I put my hands out to welcome a baby into the world and I think about those being born this minute in Gaza. Are they warm? Are they free from pain? Are they hungry? How do we heal the hearts of the people left behind after such suffering?
The would like you to not stress today, everything is going to be ok. For us. For the white people living on stolen land, be it in North America or elsewhere.
But we, the white people ignoring or excusing immense suffering, we will not be all right. eventually, the Palestinian people will heal, but we will never heal from causing such harm. Our lives are darker now, our hearts a little harder, our souls a little smaller.
Yes, I will keep living my life. I will keep attending births, smiling at my children on the playground, cooking a large dinner for my extended family on this day celebrating genocide. But I will be struggling twice as hard every day for the rest of my life to make up for what has been done in my role in it.
Today that means giving more than double the amount of money I spent on this meal to land back organizations. it means sending hardcopy letters to our government demanding a permanent ceasefire now. It means continuing to give a tithe of my earnings to black and indigenous Midwifery student scholarships. It means educating myself on all of the genocides, currently occurring across the globe, and taking it upon myself to do the work of figuring out how to commit myself to protesting them with my money, my voice, my time, and my heart.
God said:
GOD MADE YOU. GOD DOES NOT CARE
IF YOU ARE "GUILTY" OR NOT.
I said:
I CARE IF I AM GUILTY!
I CARE IF I AM GUILTY!...
God was silent.
Everything was SILENT.
— Frank Bidart, from "The War of Vaslav Nijinsky"; Half-light: Collected Poems 1965-2016
"YOU HAVE TO ACT AS IF IT WERE POSSIBLE TO RADICALLY TRANSFORM THE WORLD. AND YOU HAVE TO DO IT ALL THE TIME."
ANGELA DAVIS