http://www.umbrellaministries.org/

Umbrella Ministries Grief Support, 2888 E. Loker Avenue, Suite 110, Carlsbad, CA (2025)

10/16/2025

Sacrifice of Praise
Hebrews 13:15 “Through Jesus, therefore, let us continually offer to God a sacrifice of praise—the fruit of lips that openly profess his name. And do not forget to do good and to share with others, for with such sacrifices God is pleased.”

Today is Labor Day and it doesn’t just mean a day off work; for me it is a holiday that represents the coming of the end of the summer and the beginning of the fall season, which leads into Thanksgiving and Christmas. Since I have always worked full-time, I usually had something fun planned for this particular three-day weekend; it would either be a weekend getaway or an invitation would go out to friends and family for a barbecue or pool party. But things in my life are much different now. I’m no longer married and my disabled son now resides in Heaven, I’ve moved from San Diego to a rural town in East Texas and it is days like this that cause me to feel isolated. I have never minded living alone, but holidays are always hard when my entire family have lives of their own and live in different states. I try not to look ahead and just enjoy the day off, but if I’m honest, the thought of facing another holiday season without solid plans with a significant other or my immediate family is just agonizing for me.

Isaiah 45:3 says, “I will give you hidden treasures, riches stored in secret places, so that you may know that I am the LORD, the God of Israel, who summons you by name.” As I open up God’s Word this morning, He reminds me that I am not alone and that this is not just another amazing day in the beautiful life that He has given me. Yes, it may be that today represents the end of one season and the beginning of another, but so it also is with the seasons in my life. Each new day, each new chapter, represents hidden treasures, riches that are stored in the secret places of my relationship with the Lord and in the moments He allows me to be of service to Him and to others. All I have to do is to recognize what those treasures are and I am immediately reminded of who I am and why I am here on this earth. My life is to be an act of worship to the audience of One and instead of looking at what I don’t have at this very instant or in the near future, I will trust God’s will and plan for my life.

As I turn on some praise music, those feelings of loneliness disappear as I offer a sacrifice of praise and thanksgiving to my Lord and Savior and just like that, His Living Water flows into my heart and soul and the fullness of His Spirit causes me to have an attitude of gratitude for this extra day off and for the person of Jesus who has blessed me so richly and when I share that gratitude with another, I know that He is pleased.
-- Melody

10/09/2025

If the Tears Come.................
When the doctor told my husband and I just before our daughter was born, that she was not going to live, that her survival would only be counted in minutes or hours, the suffocating darkness of grief, and guilt, and emptiness, descended. The darkness encapsulated my world, and I begged God for understanding and hope. I knew if any answers existed, they would be found with Him, and yet, although my tears and darkness continued to cry out to God, it would be years before I realized the answers He had for me. In time, I found His answers of comfort and hope, and even the beauty He wanted to bring from the tragedy of Tonia’s death. He strengthened me, helped me to understand His answers, and shaped me to be a voice of comfort for others. Tonia still had a big place in my heart, a heart that still pulsed for her, remembered her, and wanted to honor her. And sometimes still the tears would come, and sometimes, they still do, especially at weddings.

God blessed us after Tonia’s death with three healthy boys, all of whom I am proud of, all of whom have loved us, and given to us. But Tonia was the daughter her Daddy would have delighted in walking down the aisle at her own wedding. I think my tears at weddings started when I began to realize I was now going to weddings of young girls who would have been about Tonia’s age. I knew for Tonia, her delight was now, and had been, in all the perfections of Heaven and in the presence of Jesus. But still, for me, the tears came........

But God also gives daughters-in-love, the bride who by marriage, also becomes part of our family. Again, we have been blessed, but we have the youngest of our sons, who has looked long and hard for that special one, and in a couple of weeks, Rebecca will become our daughter-in-love. It has been a special joy to start welcoming Rebecca into our family, and to realize the gift she is to all of us. And then, only a few days ago, Rebecca let God give us another gift. She connected with our granddaughter, Emily, who had just bought a beautiful dress for the wedding, and asked her to be her bridesmaid. She would be the only one. Emily excitedly replied with a yes, but Emily’s excitement was echoed by her parents and her grandparents.

It was then I cried my tears, but they were tears of joy. Joy that reminds me God never forgets. God sees and knows and cares, and softens the heart that can still feel pain decades later. Joy that burst forth in gratitude to our God who never quits giving. Joy in ALL of my daughters. Each a priceless gift. Each a song within my own heart. Each a reflection of our loving, caring God. I may still cry at Rebecca’s wedding, but if the tears come, they will be tears of joy.

After hearing Emily will be Rebecca’s bridesmaid, and experiencing my response, in my thoughts, I was briefly in Heaven, talking quietly with Tonia. I asked her, “Did you suggest all of this to God?” And Tonia just smiled.
– Bev
(Related Bible reading: Psalm 40:1-3)

10/01/2025

Moms and supporters of bereaved moms we have a great need to reach more hurting mothers. We could do that by having a greater presence on other social media platforms such as Instagram, TikTok LinkedIn and I don't know all the ones that are out there X maybe.
If you would like to help, please message me and we can talk about it.

09/28/2025

The video of our children's pictures.

09/28/2025

Did you miss our fundraising walk at Mission Beach today? We want to share the photos and a video of the signs with our children photos.
The walk donation window closes Friday night.

09/25/2025

He Who Watches Over Me
Psalm 142:3 “When my spirit grows faint within me, it is you who watch over my way.”

When I was growing up, even though I had an earthly biological father, the memories of him have never been good; in fact, to the contrary, there were traumatic events that happened in my childhood that caused me to feel overwhelming fear, anxiousness, and at times I felt abandoned and extremely unsafe. Gentleness and tenderness were never characteristics I remember as a child and, as a result, trust does not come easy for me. As a child, I learned to retreat into a world of my own when I felt unsafe and I would talk to myself out loud and even then, in those times when I felt so incredibly alone, I knew instinctively that I was not alone. From a very young age I always felt there was a presence who watched over every single thing that happened. It was almost as if I could see that girl crying, but I never really connected with her. I was always reaching out to something bigger, wondering who could see me, who could hear me, who really cared about me, and I knew that someone did, and as a small child, in my loneliness, that is where I drew my comfort.

I love the parable of the mustard seed, "What shall we say the kingdom of God is like, or what parable shall we use to describe it? It is like a mustard seed, which is the smallest of all seeds on earth. Yet when planted, it grows and becomes the largest of all garden plants, with such big branches that the birds can perch in its shade." (Mark 4:30-32.) Developing faith and trust in our heavenly Father is a very slow process and it takes a very long time; in fact, for most people it takes a lifetime. I began to develop a trust in something greater as a very young child and that little seed that the Lord planted in me as a child has grown over the years. If you look at the rest of this scripture, in Mark 4:34, it says, that Jesus “did not say anything to them without using a parable. But when He was alone with His own disciples, He explained everything.” It has always been when I am alone with Him that the Lord has shown me His greatest insights, has given me my most significant epiphanies. Always it has been when He has taken me aside and shown me how to examine my heart, how to give Him my fears, how to lay down my doubts, that He has given me back in return every time I get alone with Him. He gives me a little bit more tenderness, a little bit more gentleness, a little bit more peace, a little more understanding, things that the world has never been able to give me. It has taken a lifetime for me coming to a place where I am finally so comfortable with Him that I long to be alone with Him every opportunity I have.

In Hebrews 13:5, Jesus says, "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you." He will never abandon me, He will always be with me, He will always see me and track with me. He will be that consistent friend who will never forsake me or disappoint me. But the best part about my heavenly Father is that he is giving me what my earthly father never was capable of giving me, tenderness, sweetness, gentleness, patience, goodness, kindness, comfort, peace, security, healing, adoration and most of all the love that I have craved my entire life, and it is only found in One place. And His promise to me is that “surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age." (Matt. 28:20) That alone for me is the best source of comfort I will ever have.

– Melody

09/19/2025

The Hope of Heaven
Isaiah 55:8-9 "For My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways My ways," declares the LORD. “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways and My thoughts than your thoughts.”

I’ve been doing an in-depth study of Heaven since Elisha has transitioned to his permanent heavenly home and yet there are still so many questions I have, so many things I still want to understand. The more I desire to see glimpses of our eternal home, the more the Lord brings me comfort, peace, hope and assurance about what I do not see, about what is to come, not only eternally, but here on Earth. I desperately want to understand the “why” of all of this and I want to understand what God is doing, what He is about to do and what the future holds. Sometimes I think if I knew what was coming, I would feel better about what was happening.

Randy Alcorn, author of one of the best books I have read called, “Heaven,” said, “Insisting on knowing the unknowable dooms us to frustration and resentment toward God. We lack God’s omniscience, omnipotence, wisdom, holiness, justice and goodness. If we insist we have the right, or even assume we have the capacity to understand the hidden purposes of God, we forfeit the comfort and perspective we could have had in kneeling before His vastly superior wisdom. God’s answer is beyond our understanding.” And so it all boils down to trust. Trust is something that the Lord has been developing in me daily as He shows me continually day after day, how incredibly faithful He truly is. Even in the midst of my dull lack of faith, He shows up in such amazing ways, I can scarcely begin to write them all down. But I find it interesting that His timing is always perfect.

Corrie ten Boom, author of the “The Hiding Place,” was a martyr for the Christian faith and she went through deep suffering and sorrow in a N**i concentration camp; she watched her father and her sister die and only she survived. When she was a little girl she said to her father, “Daddy, I am afraid that I will never be strong enough to be a martyr for Jesus Christ.” “Tell me,” said her wise father, “when you take a train trip to Amsterdam, when do I give you the money for the ticket? Three or four weeks before?” Corrie replied, “No, Daddy, you give me the money for the ticket just before we get on the train.” “That’s right,” he replied, “and so it is with God’s strength. Our Father in Heaven knows when you need the strength to be a martyr for Jesus Christ. He will supply all you need just in time.” When I stop and think about how many years the Lord was equipping and strengthening Corrie while she was trapped in the concentration camp, my heart is humbled to the core.

I realize that my sufferings are minuscule compared to what this woman went through, and now she stands in the presence of our Savior with a crown of righteousness because she believed that there is no pit so deep that God is not deeper still. Romans 8:37 says, “In all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us.” A sweet friend of mine told me that trust is like being on a trapeze. As the trapeze artist jumps from one bar, and is just about to grab the other bar that is coming, he is suspended in the air for a time until the other bar comes to him, where he will grab on and get to the other side, to a platform that is stable and safe. That is where I am at right now, I am waiting. I am suspended in the air, ready to grab the rung that the Lord is about to give me. I know it will be great and I know it will be awesome, however, right now, I am at that awkward place where I am in transition, suspended, trusting in Him, waiting on the Lord and knowing that what He has in store for me will be far better than I could have ever hoped, dreamed or imagined.
– Melody

09/08/2025

Please join us on September 27th for our third annual Mission Bay, CA remembrance fundraising walk.

08/22/2025

Eternal Perspective
Job 23:10-11 “But He knows the way that I take; when He has tested me, I will come forth as gold. My feet have closely followed His steps; I have kept to His way without turning aside.”

Have you ever noticed that the storms in our lives not only drive us into the arms of our Savior, but our faith seems to grow exponentially in the midst of them? In Texas, the weather changes from moment to moment, and there was recently a heavy rain storm that came out of nowhere, causing the river to swell over 22 feet in 4 hours, surging over its banks, wreaking devastating havoc, snapping trees like they were toothpicks, swallowing up cars and homes and sweeping away sleeping children and families. The fallout was overwhelming. There are personal storms that each and every one of us face every day, and those storms may come out of nowhere and blind side us, knocking us off our feet, and, at times, may leave us debilitated. It seems that so many people I know are going through such difficult trials. One friend’s husband just died suddenly; another friend is going through treatment for stage 4 cancer, and another friend just lost her daughter. Faith is that God-given ability that allows us to put things in perspective, even in the midst of such unbearable tragedy.

2 Corinthians 1:3-4 says, “Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God.” The Lord never ceases to amaze me that He strategically put these three beautiful ladies into my life right here and right now, just when I need them most and just when they needed our Savior’s hope. I know that my Father has equipped me and has prepared me for such a time as this and He has given me a divine opportunity to give away what has so freely been given to me. I can’t help but think about my eternal home in Heaven and my beautiful child who is waiting there for me there. It’s almost as if God has given me a whole new perspective about why I went through my own affliction and there is a yearning in my soul to share the peace He has given me in my own grief journey with those who are suffering in the same manner. What a beautiful story of redemption.

Hebrews 13:14 says, “For this world is not our home, we are looking forward to our city in heaven, which is yet to come.” I don’t understand everything God is doing, but I do know this, apart from Him there is no hope. And when we have hope, we have faith. We have a tendency to think that all the things happening on earth is all there is and we certainly live that way much of the time. I know that God has given me an eternal perspective since the loss of my son and I make every effort to live my life being about His business. I make myself available to Him in any capacity and it is my greatest desire to be in His service. And you know what, He has always honored that longing by allowing me to comfort others with the comfort I have received from Him. When we walk down the path together, with each other and with our Lord, He knows the way we should go as we walk closely in His footsteps without stumbling.

– Melody

08/06/2025

Love Changes Lives
“By this all will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another.”

How much can love change a life? Let me count the ways. The Lord has blessed my life with people who love me and whom I have loved. My parents raised seven of us and showed us what unconditional love looked like. They gave me the love of family which I and my brothers and sisters hold on to. They gave me a love of faith in God which I chose to walk away from at the age of 21. Big mistake!

At the age of 43, I found myself in a dark place. My life and my marriage were unraveling. My sister lovingly came to my house every day. Through tear stained eyes, I shared with her all that was wrong in my world with no hope to hold onto. She shared with me her newfound Savior. She told me how He loves me unconditionally and wanted healing in my life and marriage. Her love of Christ and her persistency brought me to a place of surrender. My sister’s love and the love of the Lord healed my marriage and my family.

As I look back at that time, I know the Lord was preparing us for what was to come - the death of our daughter Katie. It was at that time that I was in a storm like no other, the storm of grief. I was holding on to the Lord with all I had. I was broken and battered. I needed a lifeboat, a safe place to rest.

Unbeknownst to me there were two women preparing a lifeboat to come and rescue me. Donna Luke and Daisy Catchings Shader loved the Lord. They also had a love of moms who were in their own storm of grief. They wanted to comfort others as they had been comforted. Their love created Umbrella Ministries.

I have witnessed how their love, compassion and encouragement has changed not only my life, but thousands of moms throughout the world. These two women not only wanted us to survive, but thrive. It wasn’t long before I was able to climb out of my boat and climb into another mother’s grief boat and give her a safe place. She in turn found a way out of her boat and so on and so on.

Lord, through Your love and those who have been Your hands and feet, women have taken a leap of faith from their life boat and have found a life worth living.

– Michele

08/02/2025

Perfect Peace
Isaiah 26:3 “You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in You.”

As I turn my heart to the Lord this morning, my soul is filled with a mixture of emotions, a combination of gratitude and sadness. Today is my birthday and as I reflect on who I am and consider my journey on this earth, I can’t help but feel an overwhelming sense of gratitude for my God who has radically changed me into the woman He has intended me to be. My life is beautiful and amazing. I’m so incredibly blessed with a job that I love and a boss who is remarkably exactly what I have always prayed for, a lovely home, financial stability, wonderful friends, two loving dogs and perfect health. But, for some reason, on this day, I tend to look at what it isn’t and what I don’t have. Ten years ago today, we took my 22 year old son, Elisha, off life support. He passed away six days later, on June 19, 2015. My birthday has never quite been the same.

It’s so easy to go down a rabbit trail once I begin to focus on what I don’t have instead of being grateful for the blessings the Lord has provided. So here I went spiraling into the negative thinking in my head. I woke up this morning feeling lonely since I am a single woman who longs to have a lifelong companion to share my life with. I went out to the barn to get a couple of buckets of dirt to fill up a newly planted palm tree that had been uprooted as a result of some heavy storms. I tried to sweep the pool, which had overflowed with muddy water from the torrential rains. I sat in the hot tub and thought about my day, I would be flying out to San Diego in a few hours to spend the weekend with my son, my sisters and my friends, but I really wanted a special person in my life to come with me, but that didn’t happen. Do you see where this is going?

Psalm 118:24 says, “This is the day the LORD has made; let us rejoice today and be glad in it.” Then I sat down to spend some time with the One who has always been my constant companion and boy, did I get convicted. My first thought after I read these scriptures was how did I lose my peace? I have the most faithful, devoted Friend a person could have, Jesus. I am not alone, He is always with me. I have a huge barn filled with tools and things that I need and He has equipped me with everything I need to take care of things. I have a beautiful pool to sweep and in a few hours my son will be picking me up at the airport and we are going to the Fair. I have hotel reservations with my sisters on the beach in Coronado and my friends are meeting me for dinner tomorrow night. And just like that, my mind shifted back to a sense of excitement and anticipation of things to come because this is the day that the Lord has made, and when my mind is steadfast upon Him, I am in perfect peace.
-- Melody

07/27/2025

Receive Grace. Give Grace.
I had learned the principle over the years, but there was a time when my awareness of the grace God had given to me in its totality, unreservedness, and even unfairness, because Jesus gave me His perfect rightness and exchanged it for my sin (2 Corinthians 5:21), the principle of my giving grace because I know the profundity of grace being received, overwhelmed me. And I gave, because God had given to me, in totality, unreservedness, and even unfairness. And in truth, I gave too because God’s grace enabled me.

The Message paraphrase clearly shares with us a group of people who were blessed themselves by God’s grace. Their first response was a giving of themselves to God, and to give themselves in turn to others. Here is the account from “The Message."
Now, friends, I want to report on the surprising and generous ways in which God is working in the churches in Macedonia province. Fierce troubles came down on the people of those churches, pushing them to the very limit. The trial exposed their true colors: They were incredibly happy, though desperately poor. The pressure triggered something totally unexpected: an outpouring of pure and generous gifts. I was there and saw it for myself. They gave offerings of whatever they could – far more than they could afford! – pleading for the privilege of helping out in the relief of poor Christians.

This was totally spontaneous, entirely their own idea, and caught us completely off guard. What explains it was that they had first given themselves unreservedly to God and to us. The other giving simply flowed out of the purposes of God working in their lives. That’s what prompted us to ask Titus to bring the relief offering to your attention, so that what was so well begun could be finished up. You do so well in so many things—you trust God, you’re articulate, you’re insightful, you’re passionate, you love us—now, do your best in this, too. (2 Corinthians 8:1-7)
What has pushed you to the limit?? What fierce troubles have been yours? Did you place those things in the hands of God and trust Him for His provision and care? Did you find yourself a recipient of God’s grace, either directly, or as He used the hearts, the hands, the love and compassion of others? Or maybe, the grace you are so certain of, came as Jesus’ sacrifice became the eradicator of your guilt, and you walked forward as a growing child of God to become more and more like His Son, Jesus? Whatever is your own story, our awareness of God immersing us in His grace, needs to flood our hearts with a gratitude that continually motivates us in our response to God Himself, but then also, in our responses to others. What are their needs? How can I share God’s grace with them? And my giving of grace may be helping with physical needs, or it may be a listening ear for someone else who has been pushed to the limits – someone who is broken by misunderstanding, or loss, others isolating them, or ........... Build the bridge of relationship. Walk with them in their grief. Share God’s truths of forgiveness. Encourage them by just being present. Fill some care-giving hours for them.

That’s the pattern of God’s grace. Receive grace. Give grace. And give praise to God for all He gives, and for all He enables. Personally, there is no greater joy.

– Bev

Umbrella Ministries Grief Support

10/16/2025

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10/01/2025

09/28/2025

09/28/2025

09/25/2025

09/19/2025

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