03/19/2019
Just poking around on some of my open tabs and stumbled again, on some writings from several years ago...
FRIDAY, DECEMBER 21, 2012
Building Capacity
One of Scout's "assignments" if she wants to live here, is to be gentle with our cats. There are several of them and they each have their own personality. Jinx and Archie took a day or so to figure her out and decided that she would respect their space, so they have returned to their normal behaviors as if they have known Scout for years.
Quick is a semi-feral rescue kitty who sometimes wants to spend time with me though often chooses simply to decorate our furniture - and he does that well with his handsome silver tabbiness. Quickie handles himself just fine. His few feral habits - hiding, sneaking away, hissing and bolting are all useful in the presence of an unknown dog. Scout likes to give a bit of chase, though I know that Quick will always prevail.
Little Cat is another story. Little Cat is the kitten who showed up on our deck last year one week to the day after my beloved car L.C. (Elsie) was totaled. Little Cat is named for Little Car - a great honor to be sure. Little Cat has never been afraid of dogs, even when she was a very sick little kitten. She had no fear of Allie or Allie's friend Bailey (who had very little cat experience.)
Little Cat is afraid of Scout. Little Cat runs and Scout gleefully chases her. Not what I want. I'm pretty sure it's not what Little Cat wants either, though Scout seems fine with the whole deal :) I just need to know that the chase is playful and not "huntful". If it's playful, it all works out fine. This last hurdle has been preventing me from considering that Scout might stay with us. What about Little Cat? She needs to feel some security, some sense of her belonging and her place in the household. What to do?
Last night, I got up in the wee hours of the morning to use the bathroom (get it, the wee hours??) Little Cat came into the bathroom while I was there as she often does. I had not seen her much, nor petted her at all since Scout had arrived. She let me pick her up and snuggle her and fuss over her (which she does not always allow.) We had a conversation about she and Scout for a few minutes and then I set her down on the spare room bed and returned to my bed for some more sleep.
This evening when we arrived home (all the dogs were with me today to visit the chiropractor) I noticed Little Cat walking around. Hmmm.... This won't last, I thought to myself. She strolled around the dining room twirling her tail. Hmmm.... No running. Scout saw her and they looked at each other and then went on about their business. This happened several times over a half hour or so and then Little Cat screwed up her courage and walked RIGHT PAST Scout into the kitchen as Scout lay in the entire doorway. "Wow," I thought, "what's up with this??" Then I remembered talking with Little Cat the night before. I had said to her, "All you have to do Little Cat is not run. Just don't run, stand your ground a few times and it will all be fine. I believe in your capacity to learn and grow from this and I believe in Scout's capacity to learn and grow, too."
Whether or not my "words" meant anything to Little Cat, or Scout, I'll never know. Does it matter though? Was it my intention? Was it that I said, "I believe in you?" Was it just the act of believing? What if I could believe in my own capacity to learn and grow as easily as I believe in them?
I'll start here, "I believe in my capacity to learn and grow from this." Let's see what happens...
