03/19/2026
At our Own Lives effective support means that we are creating real, trusted relationships with the people we support. But we are not and should not be replacements for friendships and building real connections with our communities!
A support worker is paid. A friend is not. A support worker writes reports, follows policies, and leaves when the shift ends or the job changes. A friend stays because they choose to. When we blur those lines, we risk asking people with intellectual disabilities to pretend that something paid for is the same as something freely given.
Real support should make friendship possible, not replace it. The goal of support is not to become someone’s social world, it is to help them build one. When staff step back from trying to be the friend, space opens to help people to build friendships with neighbours, coworkers, classmates, and community members. The measure of good support is not how close the staff relationship feels. It is whether the person’s life is bigger, richer, and filled with people who are there because they want to be.
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ID: Fionn holds a cardboard sign above his head that reads "I don't want support staff as friends" - a person walking by has stopped to read the sign.
